Snarky Brides

Need to vent / my fmil

Ok so we've been planning for over a year... the wedding is outside at our house the whole deal is there. our whole thing has been super casual, fun, not to weddingie, wedding.  NOW my fmil is like what about this song (religious overtones) or having a singer ( insert local voice here) or dont you really want a tiered cake,  this or that etc... but then she says whatever you want it's your wedding.  I want to try and keep it easy but I dont know how to respond anymore.  anybody else have someone wanting to make your deal to Weddingie???

Re: Need to vent / my fmil

  • edited June 2012
    Is your FMIL helping pay for the wedding? If she is then she has a say in those things. If not, just stop talking about the wedding with her! Smile, say you've got it covered thanks, and change the subject. If she persists just walk away.
  • Try something like, "Thank you for the suggestion!" Then smile and walk away.
    If she isn't paying, then her opinion doesn't matter.
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  • I would just avoid discussing your wedding with her.  Change the subject when she brings up ideas.
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  • My FMIL does this all the time. She's notorious for coming up with these (not-so) brilliant ideas and then after pitching them to you, saying "...Just a thought." It's easiest to politely thank her for her suggestions, say you'll take her ideas into consideration, and then continue planning. But don't just write her off completely, you never know if she's going to throw out an awesome idea you actually like.
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  • I wouldn't be completely dismissive though.  My FMIL isn't paying for anything, but I still want her to feel that her opinions are being heard and considered.  This is afterall her son's wedding too and I'm sure she has been looking forward to it.  I would try to compromise with her and maybe add a couple details that she suggested but on a smaller scale.  Instead of an extravagent 3 teired cake with lots of little extra flourishes, maybe you can do a simple, elegant, teired cake that incorporates your casual, fun vision.
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  • Even if your FMIL is paying, it is your wedding and her opinion can be appreciated but the final say is on what you and your groom wants.  Anyone else can have whatever they want at their own wedding.
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