Second Weddings

My third. His first. It feels like MY first!

I have been browsing the boards this morning and I was so inspired to write a post that might help cast a ray of sunshine on you beautiful ladies.

It seems like there is a lot of fear and doubt and worry of judgement because you are embarking upon "another" wedding. I just wanted to send my love to you all. I understand that vulnerability. I had a pang of it earlier last week when an old friend and my Aunt, both made comments about it working out THIS time. I let it affect me for a few minutes and then I realized... I JUST DON'T CARE!

My fiance and I are on cloud nine over our love and anyone we come across, sees it. We don't NEED to prove that this is the right marriage. We don't need to explain that we deserve a REAL wedding. We don't need to be defined by MY past marriages. We are in love now. We are engaged now. Our past is just that... PAST. In fact, the past only exists because someone dwells on it.

I am living out loud. I live on purpose. I live in the now. We are in love and we will celebrate, register, honeymoon, have bachelorette parties, showers, STD cards, engagement parties and my fiance even asked for my Father's permission!!!

This love should not be penalized!

Ladies, jsut remember, your marriage (and how YOU choose to celebrate it), is between you TWO!

Re: My third. His first. It feels like MY first!

  • Woot woot...you go...love it!

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    image 35 are ready to party! image 6 have better things to do image41 are lollygagging
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  • Thank you for this post. This is my first and his second, but sometimes those thoughts attack me when I'm alone. We are both for forever. We don't believe in divorce. His first wife left him for another man. Sometimes, though, when I'm vulnerable, it's easy to let those nasty thoughts get in that say "what if?" Thank you.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_my-third-his-first-it-feels-like-my-first?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:83a95e63-db3c-4d61-91db-16a77e068ab0Post:9c84e254-173b-4708-96e2-b40c3027dc8b">Re: My third. His first. It feels like MY first!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Regarding LOVE as an "oh, here you go again," cheapens love, and is just downright tacky.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Love this, my sister who was all drama tried to pull this when we were talking about my and DH's wedding...  I shut her down, nicely and then put it back on her if she wanted to be a guest or an attendent. </div><div>
    </div><div>This is my first marriage to my DH and his to me.... so there. </div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_my-third-his-first-it-feels-like-my-first?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:83a95e63-db3c-4d61-91db-16a77e068ab0Post:6925e16c-7324-4e36-bd61-6847d870b588">Re: My third. His first. It feels like MY first!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thank you for this post. This is my first and his second, but sometimes those thoughts attack me when I'm alone. We are both for forever. We don't believe in divorce. His first wife left him for another man.
    Posted by geieran[/QUOTE]

    Wow, this is ME, too (my situation exactly)!  And I echo the thanks to OP.  It's so encouraging to hear that from the party who has been married before ... I would hate to think that FI was getting 2nd best, somehow.
  • What an inspired post! Thank  you. THis will be my 3rd and his 1st so it is very exciting for me to have a guy that has never taken that step to do it with me. I have been harshly judged all over the place for my previous bad choices  of abusive partners and I can tell I haven't had a real wedding before. We have not rushed into anything, everything has fallen into place at the right time ect. It is so sad though that some people can't seem to move away from the past and  be happy for you only once.
  • Thank you for the encouragement!!! This is my third time, as well and his first. He had always swore off marriage. We have gotten engaged rather quickly, but we are so in love and know that this is the real thing! Despite my happiness, I tend to find myself avoiding certain people, because I know they won't understand. I have been miserable for the past ten years and deserve to be happy! If only everyone could understand that. My first marriage was right out of high school and didn't even last two years... I love reading everyone's stories and seeing that I'm not alone!!! Thank you ladies!
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  • I am so glad to see this post today...I am in the same boat and feel the exact same way - I am ecstatic to be marrying the man I love! Congrats to you and everyone else as they prepare to walk down the aisle!
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