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Etiquette question

GJones27GJones27 member
1000 Comments
in Christian Weddings
An aunt of mine just passed away, and she and I were close (when I lived in Greece for a year, I lived with her).  She passed away on the same day I received my CD of wedding photos.  I had been impatient to share them with family, but out of respect, I'm not posting them right now.  But the question is, how long should I wait until I put them on Facebook and circulate to family?  I know that if she were here, she would want me to go ahead.  But then again, this is my Greek side of the family, and the culture views death very negatively.  I don't want to burden my family with such questions now, but I'm thinking wait until the funeral is over.  Should I wait longer than that?  Thoughts?
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Re: Etiquette question

  • LindzMarie19LindzMarie19
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would definitely wait until the funeral is over, because then it would seem like you were only thinking of your wedding,which you are obviously not. I think the length of time you wait really depends on how you feel and how your family is feeling after the funeral. If everything seems better after a week, then you can probably circulate them then.  It really just depends on how quick people begin to come to terms with her passing. Was she at the wedding? if so, then sharing pictures would bring back happy memories together and can help with coping with the loss. I hope this helps, this is a hard and sad situation. Sorry for your loss.
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  • joie424joie424
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I know you're probably looking for some kind a time stamp (I know I would be). Personally I'd wait until the funeral is over and whatever family gatherings are over as well. If it were me personally - I would wait 2 full weeks at least after all of the events had passed. That said - if you were a family member of mine, I would not judge you for putting them up if it were 1 week past the events that took place.... so I guess just use discretion at whatever you think your family will think. I hope that helps a little bit :/ So Sorry for your loss G :(
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  • GJones27GJones27 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for your opinions.  Yeah, I definitely agree wait until after the funeral out of sensitivity and respect, and I wouldn't contemplate doing it before.  It's just I didn't know how much after that, as I had already committed to people (like DH's family) to put up photos soon and I don't want to push it so far back that people get frustrated.  I'm always afraid of violating some unknown etiquette rule or something.  Sadly, my aunt was not there at the wedding, as she was very old and battling cancer in Greece.
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  • iamjoesgurliamjoesgurl member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for your loss.  It must be difficult being so far away.
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  • mrandmrsbristmrandmrsbrist member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    First and foremost, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers.

    As for the pictures, I would (as you've already said) definately wait for the funeral to be over. If any of the people you've committed to sharing them with ask about them, offer to email them or get together and show them the pictures (if that's an option). I don't know your relationship with your parents, but if I were in your shoes, I'd talk to them and talk through the questions you have.

    This is kind of hard to answer not knowing your family. Hope I helped a little bit. <3
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  • AshNoel8AshNoel8
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_etiquette-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:aa9becd8-6bc3-4b6a-94ba-66a7a6010e96Post:cd128bc8-e04a-45ea-9245-09e4d71b0400">Re: Etiquette question</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>First and foremost, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers. As for the pictures, I would (as you've already said) definately wait for the funeral to be over. If any of the people you've committed to sharing them with ask about them, offer to email them or get together and show them the pictures (if that's an option). I don't know your relationship with your parents, but if I were in your shoes, I'd talk to them and talk through the questions you have.</strong> This is kind of hard to answer not knowing your family. Hope I helped a little bit. <3
    Posted by mrandmrsbrist[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>
    </div><div>This exactly. I will keep your family in my prayers. 

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  • Bett2012Bett2012 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be hard for you and your family - so much happiness because of your recent marriage and so much grief from missing your Aunt.

    You mentioned you had told other who are not family member of your Aunt that you would give them as soon as you could - I want to encourage you by saying that if it's better for you and your family to wait a few weeks before circulating them, I'm sure the other people you are referring to will understand.  Things come up, and I'm sure they'll know that you are grieving right now and will share pictures when you feel it's appropriate.

    God bless.
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