Briday Party Complete!!!!

Re: Briday Party Complete!!!!

• AshJohnson30 member

  

  July 2012

  That's great you'll have your nieces with you!
  
  Ohhh guest lists. I had the exact same issue. FMIL's list was about 100 addresses she didn't count the individuals so FI had to have a few discussions with her about it.
  
  FI should follow up with her immediately and see who she must absolutely invite. Hopefully she's flexible so you won't be over. If she's not flexible either cut back from your side (which stinks!) or see if you can budget for 170 instead. Definitely get it resolved sooner than later though. It can be a huge headache. I hope it all works out in your favor!!

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• abwatts

  

  July 2012

  We are meeting with the caterer tonight, so tomorow we can give her a "this is what our budget is" kind of speech. I dont think the realized what she did! The problem is they are very active in their church AND her entire family lives in the same town and goes to the same church.. so they invited pretty much the entire family/congregation!!!
  
  My FI will be making a call tommorrow to wrangle her in a bit..

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• arco13 member

  

  July 2012

  I was worried about having the same issue with my mother and grandmother's churches, but luckily they're both pretty understanding about trying to keep it small. I told them to start on 2 lists, who they think I NEED to invite, and who they think I SHOULD invite if we have the budget for it. I also told them to make sure to use words like "small" and "intimiate" when discussing the wedding.

  
  

  Hopefully once you explain the budget to her, she'll understand.

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• AshJohnson30 member

  

  July 2012

  Yep my FMIL basically took the church directory to make her list. It'll all work out though!

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• roseofdeborah

  

  July 2012

  My father was going to post on his high school class forum that gets about 70 hits a week that anyone who wanted to come was welcome. And he was going to do this a week before the wedding. So him and I had a sit down about what he could do to invite people and what he could not do. Your fiance will most likely have to do the same with his mom.

  

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• CATurren member

  

  July 2012

  I had the exact same problem except it was my FI's stepmom (who no one really likes or gets along with).  Our number was 150 so I split it down the middle and said we each get 75.  When he finally dit down with them, she came up with 90+.....I said that better change.  She said they would make up the difference with the money, but we had deposits down on everything with 150.  I just got snarky and said you have 75, that's it, you cut it down or I will.  

  I am mostly paying for the wedding so I want to celebrate with MY friends, not my FI's great second step uncle who he never sees.  It got kind of messy, but I just couldn't afford it.  

  It's an awkward convo and situation, but you just have to be firm.

  -Cassidy

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• arco13 member

  

  July 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_briday-party-complete?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:102Discussion:28fc469e-5372-42b4-bb16-1b6e9fa36903Post:06d6366c-346b-478d-9b49-78d904c0586d">Re: Briday Party Complete!!!!</a>:
  [QUOTE]<strong>My father was going to post on his high school class forum that gets about 70 hits a week that anyone who wanted to come was welcome. And he was going to do this a week before the wedding</strong>. So him and I had a sit down about what he could do to invite people and what he could not do. Your fiance will most likely have to do the same with his mom.
  Posted by roseofdeborah[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>Baaaaaaaahahahahahaha. This really made me laugh for some reason. I can just imagine a clueless father thinking that's ok. It's probably good that my dad went to high school in Ohio.
  
  </div>

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• abwatts

  

  July 2012

  My FMIL is probably the NICEST person in the world. And yes I am pretty sure they got out othe church directory. I habe no problem with them inviting people from the church, but if thats the case then my FI suggested that since we are having our wedding here and not in Texarkana where the masses are, that we have some sort of reception at the church (cake and punch thing) after the fact so that they can feel like they have included the ENTIRE congregation.
  
  FI did talk to his dad and they will get it under control.. but you're right, we are not going to cut OUR friends so that people can come for etiquette sake! It will be ok, it was just a huge shock when I saw her list!

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