2 Questions: #1 Wording on Invites & #2 What to do with registries and letting people know

Crazy_Sunshine55 · May 2010

So here's my first question:

My fiance and I are completely changing our last name. We have a good reason for doing so. To make a long story short....His dad cheated REALLY badly on his mother and he later found out that the whole side of his dads family have been cheaters. So he doesn't want any association with that last name. So we found a last name that we both love. The way we see it, it's starting our own family tree, our own lives together, it's something that's just us, and starts our life together as a family.

The problem I'vefound is how do we word the invites because we want to give a heads up and not have everyone at the wedding asking us what's up or question why the DJ introduced us as someone else. And were doing an Adult Only wedding so that's another thing we are trying to word out on the invites.

Question #2

I've read that it's HORRIBLE to have the registry stuff with the invites....so what do you do with all of that stuff and how do you let people know, wait for them to call and ask??

THANKS GUYS!

lauralaur · May 2010

Hmmm, I have no suggestions on the names, but. Yes, it is horrible to include registry info in the invites so yes, you do wait for them to call and ask.

Simply Fated · May 2010

I would wait after the wedding to change your names. This way, it might help the wedding go smoother when it comes to names.
if you are set on changing your names before then, the guests will hear your new names before the reception... when the officiant says your names. "Do you <name /> take you <name>" etc, lol

And there is no way to word registry info or Adults only info politely on invites, so it's word of mouth or bust. When adressing the invites, don't put the kids names on them. You might have to field phone calls because of this, but it is what it is.

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

I'd suggest changing your names after the wedding. FI and I thought about doing this too. I think it's really cool you've both found a name you love.
You don't need to put any reference to Adults Only on the invite. Just put the names of those invited on the envelope. If they rsvp for their kids, call and explain that only Mr. and Mrs. Smith are invited.

Registry information is spread through word of mouth.

Crazy_Sunshine55 · May 2010

Yes, We have decided to wait to change our names, we were just going to keep them the same til we got back from our honeymoon since we got our tickets already and they are in our current last names. SO if we wait, do we just tell people to not say Mr. & Mrs....."......"?

Brie2010 · May 2010

Re: the names--have you looked into this at all? It's a lot more complicated to do this kind of name change than it is to just do a marriage name change. You have to petition the court, usually, and hire a lawyer to just pick a new name out of nowhere to use.

Crazy_Sunshine55 · May 2010

Yes, I've looked at it

cschuma2 · May 2010

I wouldn't wait until after the wedding just to avoid answering the questions. If you don't announce your new last name at the wedding (even if it isnt officially changed yet), people will just be confused later and may not even know you changed your name. I would definitely make sure that you have talked it over with both of your families first so there are not surprises and to eliminate the confusion at the ceremony/reception. The more people you tell before... the less you will have to talk about it at the reception.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · May 2010

Announce your new last name at the wedding. Sign your thank you notes with the new last name. You can also send out "at home" cards. These are somewhat old-fashioned, but they are basically change of address cards. Even if you aren't moving, these will tell your guests your current names and addresses. You can put these at everyone's seat at the reception, include them with the thank you notes, or send them out separately.

Do not include "adults only" or any reference to the registry in the invitations.

Crazy_Sunshine55 · May 2010

Thanks. So for the adults only thing.....am I going to have to call everyone, which could be hard bc some of the phone numbers "don't exsit"

2 Questions: #1 Wording on Invites & #2 What to do with registries and letting people know

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