My dad will be walking me down the aisle. I left home years ago and was married once before. I live with my FI. I'm not really being "given away" if you know what I mean. How should the minister phrase the "Who gives this woman away?" question?
We didn't use the phrase at all. I presented myself to be married, no one else had anything to do with it. Our celebrant agreed that anything related to a family of origin was not appropriate at this point. She had the assembled guests offer a blessing. ~Donna
This question is not required, even at a first wedding. If you want to acknowledge your parents in the ceremony, you could always follow a Jewish tradition that is becoming more common in other ceremonies: have both of FI's parents escort him, and both of your parents escort you. That acknowledges your roots, without sounding like a medieval property transfer.
I *think* my dad will walk me down the aisle, depends on whether he gets over his fear of being the center of attention, LOL. He's 85, so it's a pretty ingrained fear.
I like the idea of not saying anything, the minister does not have to include that in the ceremony.
My father escorted me down the aisle. We stopped at the first pew, where my mother was seated. He gave me a kiss and I went on my merry way -- by myself -- up to the altar. There was no mention of him/them giving me away.
This time around, FI and I will process up the aisle together, after spending a good 15 - 20 minutes (we think) greeting each of our guests.
My dad walked me down the aisle, I was married in a Catholic mass and asking who is giving the woman in marriage is not part of the how weddings are done. My dad walked me down the aisle where my husband (groom) was waiting below the altar, kissed my check, shook my husband's hand and then I took my husband my his arm and we walked up to the altar together.
I think your dad can escort you without giving you away.
I recently attended a wedding where the couple's grown children said something in unison about approving of the union (I think hers first, in unison, and then his). I'm thinking of doing something like that, or maybe having my son walk me down the aisle, or all my children.
My son is walking down the aisle and the minister is asking "who asks this mas to join this family" and having all three of mychildren reply in unison.
Re: Giving the bride away
One of the reasons I found vows that made no mention of that. Regardless of age or whatever, I am not medieval chattel to be given away.
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I like the idea of not saying anything, the minister does not have to include that in the ceremony.
This time around, FI and I will process up the aisle together, after spending a good 15 - 20 minutes (we think) greeting each of our guests.
I think your dad can escort you without giving you away.