Second Weddings

Resources for a Second Wedding? Magazines, etc?

LOVE the Knot, but... does anyone know of any other resources out there for second time brides?

I went through the bookstore this weekend and there was an entire wedding section. And every book and magazine seemed targeted toward first weddings.

I'm sure some of you can relate - this time around will be smaller, more intimate - less about the details and more about the commitment. Meaning - I am not having a dress, or a cake, or groomsmen. It's depressing - all it does is make me second guess my decision to forego all of that pomp and fluff this time around... it's marketing.

Is there a magazine out there that I might find useful? Or not :( ?

Secondly, what are some of you doing to make sure your moment is magical if, like us, you are choosing to do something super small and intimate?

Thanks,

Gonnaberachelk

This isn't our second time at the rodeo; this is our LAST time at the rodeo. Loving my homeboy God-guy!!!

Re: Resources for a Second Wedding? Magazines, etc?

  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree, there are no magazines that target primarily second time brides. You might google "books for second weddings" or something like that.

    Some of us are doing all out stuff, some smaller and scaled down. I'm sure you will get a lot of input here, everyone is very helpful.

    This is my first marriage, but my fiance's 3rd. So while it's not a subsequent wedding for me, I'm much more mature than the first time brides and feel very welcome here.

    As for your plans, I'd talk to your fiance and see what he envisions. I've read on some posts, imagine it's the day after your wedding, what would you like to be talking about? Who was there? What happened? What things did you "re-do" that you did the first time you were married, but it felt better this time around? Is there a place that's special to both of you where you'd like to celebrate the ceremony and/or reception? Doesn't have to be fancy, but meaningful.

    Good luck. I'm sure the inspiration will come to you.
  • 2dBride2dBride member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think Offbeat Bride is a particularly wonderful resource for encore brides, although it is not limited to them.  Indeed, it is not actually limited to brides who are "offbeat."  Instead, it is geared toward brides who have not bought into the whole Wedding Industrial Complex, and are working to make their weddings meaningful to them and their spouses.

    As for ways we made our intimate (a dozen guests) ceremony meaningful, you might want to check out this post I did about our wedding planning.  Suffice it to say that everything from having my ex-husband give the blessing over bread to coming up with a custom ketubah (Jewish wedding contract) was very much "us."
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I have found Real Simple's Weddings magazine to be very useful.  While not targeted at first timers exclusively, it dispenses with assumptions of what "must be" done.  There is also a great pull-out section to use for planning each element of the wedding and reception.

    I find the following books very helpful, for reality checks, if not out-right advice:  

    The Smart Couple's Guide to the Wedding of Your Dreams: Planning Together for Less Stress and More Joy
    by Judith Sherven, James Sniechowski

    Simple Stunning Weddings: Designing and Creating Your Perfect Celebration
    by Karen Bussen, Ellen Silverman

    The Wedding Guide for the Grownup Bride: Getting Married When You're Old Enough to Know What You're Doing
    by Shelly Christiansen

    I also love to go to stylemepretty.com.  I find inspiration while browsing through their Real Weddings section.  In fact, I found both my wedding canopy and cake topper (and we weren't even considering a cake topper) while looking at the site.

    Best of luck!
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_resources-second-wedding-magazines-etc?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:730013ff-d949-4f11-9498-bdbb18532048Post:c6034152-ba62-4f4f-8940-f2c9627abf4b">Resources for a Second Wedding? Magazines, etc?</a>:
    [QUOTE]LOVE the Knot, but... does anyone know of any other resources out there for second time brides? I went through the bookstore this weekend and there was an entire wedding section. And every book and magazine seemed targeted toward first weddings. I'm sure some of you can relate - this time around will be smaller, more intimate - less about the details and more about the commitment. Meaning -<strong><font color="#ff0000"> I am not having a dress</font></strong>, or a cake, or groomsmen. It's depressing - all it does is make me second guess my decision to forego all of that pomp and fluff this time around... it's marketing. Is there a magazine out there that I might find useful? Or not :( ? Secondly, what are some of you doing to make sure your moment is magical if, like us, you are choosing to do something super small and intimate? Thanks, Gonnaberachelk
    Posted by gonnaberachelk[/QUOTE]

    Wait a minute!!  <strong>Are ya planning on being naked??</strong>  Or have you decided to wear pants?  Either is a valid option, although you might be arrested for going au naturel.  LOL!

    I'm not wearing a bridal gown (nor did I for my first wedding), but certainly plan to make it a dressy affair (for me).  Take a look at the post re: wedding gowns for brides over 50 (down there somewhere) and see if you find inspiration.

    Good luck!
  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lisa - There was a time when I was threatening to be the naked bride...Wink
     
    GonnaBeRachelK - no where does it say that you have to give up the things you would like for your celebration of love.  If you want a dress, get a dress, if you want attendants have them - have the wedding you want.  If you want an intimate ceremony with a party afterward go for it. 

    I agree though that there are a lot of resources that assume all brides are first timers and young. Which isn't the best assumption to make in this day and age.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm almost grateful there are so few resources because then we might succumb to the silliness of the younger brides.  The beauty of our weddings is that we can do what we want and not what the wedding industry tells us we "have" to do.  If you want a fabulous gown, have it or don't.  If you want a large party have it or don't.  Because there are no rules, like Burger King, we can "have it our way."  My wedding is four days away, and I am hoping my guests will be saying, "beautiful, elegant and sophisticated," but I have eliminated many, many wedding cliches: tosses, receiving lines, wedding cake, dancing, a bar, bachelorette party, an entourage of attendants, boudoir photos, foot washing, ring warming, unity candles and probably a host of other aggravation makers younger brides indulge in, and who knows, maybe one of us will write that book for the somewhat older and much more sophisticated bride on how to have an unforgetable wedding without the stress of the traditional, cookie cutter event espoused by the wedding industry. 
  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    AlexMom2 - Well said!
  • vmmomvmmom member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    "Secondly, what are some of you doing to make sure your moment is magical if, like us, you are choosing to do something super small and intimate?" =

    We decided to do a destination wedding.  This helps us alleviate the temptation to start inviting lots and lots of people.  It is just us and immediate family.  And since we are getting married the first day of our cruise we will have a whole week to celebrate with our families!
  • edited December 2011
    We should start a website for second time/older brides.  I think princesss dresses and such are beautiful.  But if it isn't your first wedding or marriage or if you are seasoned we might want to do things differently. 

    Like dresses, veils, family, invites, etc.
  • lwhitworth67lwhitworth67 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    That's the beauty of second weddings though! You can do things any way you wish! There's no need to go by "tradition" or anything else unless you choose to. Our wedding theme is going to be "A Whole New World" because for us it is a whole new world... And my fiance treats me like a princess..so why not be one for a day?!

    You can keep it as low key or as fancy as you want! Ours is going to be a small, back yard wedding. So casual, informal... but whatever makes us happy is what we'll do! :)  And that's how it should be done!

    In God's Hands
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