set up and clean up???

pickels09 · May 2012

We're planning to have our wedding at a venue that doesn't provide set up and clean up, I told my mom that our wedding party and close family can help us do all the set up and clean up but she insist that no one should have to or will want to do that. is this something that the wedding party shouldn't have to do? should we hire someone to do all that for us? please any advice will help, thank you!

meganpow87 · May 2012

My Friends and Family volunteered to help me clean up and set up, I've had all sorts of people ask me to tell them what they can do to help. My GM have especially volunteered to help set up, and I have them a room they can shower and get ready after set up. We all help each other out like that, I went to a wedding of one of FI this weekend and I stayed until about midnight and helped clean up until I was dead tired but that's what we do for each other...

If this isn't an option for you, maybe you can coordinate your florist, caterer, dj and such to set up their own tables and things they need. Or if you have hired a wedding coordinator she/he can help you find someone to set up and clean up. Hope this helps! Good luck!

bunni727 · May 2012

No, the wedding party shouldn't have to set up or clean up afterwards.

If they ask how they can help, then you can tell them. I have a couple of friends who will be helping, but only because they volunteered. If no one offers, you need to hire someone.

kmmssg · May 2012

Your mom is right. You need to hire some people to do this. You asked these people to stand up in your wedding not set up the reception and clean up the garbage afterwards.

ETA - it is entirely different if you have a scenario like Megan's where people volunteer to do these things. If people ASK if you need help setting up/tearing down that's great! I do that for close family and friends. Just don't ask.

Summer2011Bride · May 2012

I would not expect family and friends to set up or tear down. They shouldn't have to work for your wedding. If someone offers without you asking or hinting, then it's fine to take them up on their offer. But I would hire some people (check event planning business in town, etc). I would not want to have to do all that myself; that's something I'd be fine with paying for to take the stress off me.

AurorasEnvy · May 2012

Like PPs said, if they offer, great, if not....look into other options.

A friend of mine in school was a BM in a wedding - the bride asked her to ask around our class for anyone who wanted to make some money for a couple of hours of work helping set up/clean up her wedding. They found plenty of people willing to help out for a few bucks.

I also have a DOC (day of coordinator) who does this, among other things. I'm not getting married until Saturday, but she's probably been the best money I've spent just knowing I'm not going to have to worry about any of the little details or chores of the day.

Just a few thoughts.

erollis · May 2012

I had plenty of people offer to help with setting up and taking down what we brought to our venue (flowers, centerpieces, decorations, guest book and unity candles). There was even a couple of guests that showed up early that decided to help out. My mil helped set up even though I insisted that she shouldn't. After several times of her offering I gave in and agreed to her helping out. I just got lucky. Thankfully our venue set up and took down tables, linens, chairs and places for the food. The vendors (dj, caterer, backer) set up in the places they were provided.

If no one offers then you must hire someone or set it up yourself. I am sure a couple of the neighbor kids/ high-schoolers would not mind setting up if you pay them.

I was forced to set up at a couple of weddings because I was apart of the bridal party. It was just this has to be done tonight, so do it. If I was asked nicely well in advance I would have said yes (and been much happier).

Queen Jane · May 2012

Your mom is right. Our DOC was in charge of setup. We paid our caterers a small fee to have them clean up the tables and put them and the chairs away, remove garbage, etc. Don't pawn this onto friends and family.

If anyone offers, set up is a far better option than clean up, IMO.

librababy · May 2012

If they offer, then by all means, take them up on it. People will offer to help you set up (anyway they do in our families) and more than likely, people will stay after to help clean up as well.

We also have a venue that we will be responsible for setting up and cleaning up afterwards (I still have to work out all the details of that). BUT I am hiring a DOH (day of helper) to handle most of that. She will help us set up and will handle the clean up, along with the caterer.

pickels09 · May 2012

thank you for all the input!:)

Cackle6 · May 2012

Ditto PP - unless your guests have offered the help, you should not be asking anyone do do that. My family offered to help set up, which I took them up on, but I hired someone to do my ceremony set up and my reception tear down.

If you haven't had your wedding yet and are still looking for someone to do your set up and clean up, I just used Jodi from Avail in Minnaepolis and she did a great job and is very affordable!

http://www.availmn.com/

RNMOMTO3 · June 2012

My mom graciously paid for 2 people that my good friend/ bridesmaid had worked with waiting tables and they were a God send. I didn't have to worry about those things and it allowed me to fully enjoy our day.

set up and clean up???

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