Am I the only one or something

DJTraceyD · May 2010

It is both FI and I's 2nd marriage, we both have children (3 mine 2 his, 4 girls one boy all together)

Anyhow...we are doing the full wedding so we can "do it right" this time around...and allow our little girls to get the whole flower girl/jr bridesmaid experience...anyone else doing this??

I keep getting weird looks when looking for a dress etc...cause i want a normal wedding gown and not an overly casual one, my opinion is you know what...I"m spending more on a nicer dress than a casual one, be happy about that LOL

Anyone else dealing with this and how do you approach it...I just smile and keep going, cause i know i have 4 excited little girls at home who are looking forward to being in their mommy and daddy's wedding and it will make them feel more like part of the union and family and that WE ARE ONE BIG FAMILY!!!
(not going into the deal with the boy, he's a 9 yr old boy and dressing up isn't something he gets excited over!! LOL)

melissamc2 · May 2010

This is my third wedding and it's completely over the top. Whenever anyone frowns upon it, I point out to them that if what I'm doing with my wedding is the most pressing thing they have going on in their lives and are really that lacking of things to bitch about, then I'm glad to give them something to talk about for the next few months.

Congratulations!

MikesAngie · May 2010

Hi! And congratulations!! The best advice I have for your situation is do it your way! If you get a "look" that is disapproving move on they don't need your business this is your celebration and your special day - celebrate it your way!! Wear what you want who cares if it's your second, third or whatever time "down the aisle" it's still your first marriage to that person and you are celebrating that love.

Enjoy the planning and have as much fun as possible while doing it!

Amomtomanyluvs · May 2010

well i have a few family members who feel i should be having a causal dress, perhaps not white. but i am not even sure i want white...ivory maybe. and yes casual but still elegant.

i have 2 girls, and 1 boy and a soon to be step son. and although our wedding will be casual...it will be extremely personal and very much full of character i feel a perfect wedding should have. my 2 girls will be the flower girls and we bought their dresses already and so many people...mainly my friends and my fam like my mom and dad...and FI parents etc. are very much for all that. im paying for everything myself anyways (well FI is...) and our sons will be ring bearers...

its your wedding...screw anyone who doesnt agree...

deepcovejackie · May 2010

This time around, I'm not doing this for anyone but myself, FI, and our kids. We, as a group, will be doing what feels right to us. There are no rules, and I'm ignoring any side-eye that I get from friends and family. Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

SheDiva4 · May 2010

I get looks as well, this is my and my FI's 2nd as well and we have 4 children between us. Even though we both had "weddings" before we are still having a wedding, with BM, GM and all. Our Children are a big part and will be BM and GM.

I was asked by someone, "why are you getting married in a church" As if the 2nd time around you are banned from getting married in a church.

I've also heard I should just wear a nice suit and go to the courthouse.

I don't let these comments or the funny looks get to me. It's their issue not mine.

I've usually ignore them or act as if they are speaking a foreign language.

Sue-n-Kevin · May 2010

As you can see, you are not unusual.

The odd looks & comments came when I went to a wedding show recently with my fiance & 15 yr old daughter. ALL the vendors thought SHE was the bride and we were just the parents of the bride. HA! She is taller than I am, but still, I don't think she looks old enough to be getting married!

This is the "no rules" board. We all want the type of wedding we want, regardless of the previous weddings.

Welcome, and have fun planning!

pamila51510 · May 2010

I am havin a party period. I have finally found the right guy this is my 3rd time around. I don't care what anyone else says I am havin a tiara and a veil and the big ball gown and I love it!!! Below is me and my 3 girls 2 are bridesmaids the oldest twin is gonna be my flower girl .

lele7575 · May 2010

dont worry about what other people think!! this is YOUR day (and your fi day) and you should plan and do whatever you want to. it's going to be mine and my fi 2nd time around and he is going all out and i'm loving it!!!

DJTraceyD · May 2010

Oh we're having a blast!!! and its sooooooo fun watch our little girls get all excited and crazy over it!!! And the fact that I'm not pregnant this time around :P Honestly, I don't even feel the stress like i did the first time around (again i was pregnant and threw it together pretty fast and had no help from the ex), My FI is right there with me planning and helping and so are our parents...I don't even think my mom was this happy and excited the first time around, its just all helping us add fuel to the fire and its gonna be a BLAST!!!

DJTraceyD · May 2010

btw...we are completely paying for the whole thing...parents are just there to help

His mom even told me she don't care how the wedding goes as long as she's included and he's marrying me!!! So YAY!! lol

thealphabride · May 2010

Hey Tracy,
Welcome to the board and congrats!!!
If vendors give you so much as a wierd look or the side eye, take your business elsewhere. Second wedding money is as good as first wedding money. If anyone says anything to you... here's a good reply:

"i'm sure you didn't mean for that statement to be as ignorant as it sounded, bless your heart" I'm very willing to look elsewhere if you don't thin you can help me, then smile and wait for the response, if an appology isn't immediately given walk out.

Got the "bless your heart" from the southern girls on the board..

Obviously a lot of us have had a few comments and wierd looks, you've come to the right place for come backs, we got a million of em.

So, What are your plans?

AdelphiTN · May 2010

"Bless your heart" is one of my favs. Memorize my other fav: "Well of course I'm wearing a wedding dress. It's a wedding. Where else could i wear the silly thing?" and then smile sweetly.

BeladonaUK · May 2010

I am the oposite. My first wedding to my late husband was a casual dress and at the court house. This time I want some pomp, although it be in a garden and still quite informal.
There are so many second or third weddings these days, people should be used to people wanting another formal wedding and should not be bating an eye.

Erin McCormack · May 2010

Hi and congratulations, I felt the same way as you do until I got plenty of great advice from these ladies. Just because this is a second wedding, doesn't mean that it doesn't deserve the same excitement. It's still a celebration of the union of two loving people and in this day and age, that's something to celebrate. My older boy's are your typical boy's, tell them when and where and that's all they want to know. My daughter and my FI's daughter ( 9 & 10 ) on the other hand are so excited. They're going to be our jr. bridesmaids and they love the idea of being in the wedding. For the girls this is making us a family officially which is so important to them.

I say, our maturity affords us the wisdom to know that we can do as we wish, make great memories and a great model for the girls to look up to. Again, Congratulations!

DJTraceyD · May 2010

hehe southern sayings

gotta love em...my family is originally from the kentucky area, lived in Nebraska since I was 7, and my mom still has this thick southern accent and all the southern phrases...just love it!!

You guys put me at ease a bit and we really didn't care but it just seemed funny lol...we got our reception hall booked sunday, it was kinda funny, we had an appt since we live out of town, and some couple just kinda dropped in, for the same date so it was like a race to see who could get the check in first lol (we won the race!! hahahahaha :P) Now comes the church...that's gonna be fun :P

BluValkyrie · May 2010

Do what you want. If you want a big puffy princess gown, get it! I know I'm only counting down to my first wedding, but when I hear about people who "disapprove' of couples having a big elaborate second wedding, I kinda get a little miffed.

It's your life, do what you want.

and besides, a big wedding helps the economy!!!

luckyme502 · May 2010

Wear the dress you want. Don't let other people stop you!

robinmichael · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_am-only-one-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:d95b816e-4795-47fa-b223-d30d93dd7977Post:7c6a374e-1d55-496a-85ad-567c04e30fe0">Re: Am I the only one or something</a>:
[QUOTE]This is the "no rules" board. We all want the type of wedding we want, regardless of the previous weddings. Welcome, and have fun planning!
Posted by Sue-n-Kevin[/QUOTE]
amen! Third times a charm and thats why we're keeping our guests down to very close family and friends. I won't accept any grumblings about how either of us has been married before, how we SHOULD be doing things, attire, etc. He is my soul mate and we both deserve to celebrate with those we love in a grand way.

Am I the only one or something

Re: Am I the only one or something

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