I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!

Laurie109 · March 2012

ok, i just got messaged on fb about a younger child (5 years old) coming to the wedding. the invitation was addressed just to the parents, which they recognized, but how do i tactfully say that only the parents in this case are invited (there are "kids" coming - but by kids, I mean high school age and up). I am not going to attempt asking this question on ettiquette because those b-i-t----- will eat me alive! (lol) i need a quick answer, can't post on fb until I do...otherwise they will know i got the message and am ignoring it!

pantherRN · March 2012

Besides WP, will there be kids there? And are they out of town? If both answers are no, then politely let them know that unfortunately you cannot accommodate Junior. Let them know you hope to see them though.

leopardgurl831 · March 2012

Did you have a set age cut off? FI and I cut off around 16 or 17. I might say Sorry children under the age of "x" were not invited.

FutureMrsW9 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_i-know-weve-been-through-this-but-i-need-a-quick-answer-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:8b90a55a-e2be-4fd3-85f9-71c909b505d5Post:ee82eaf8-b2af-44ff-bd5d-69cb0ed0a21e">Re: I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Did you have a set age cut off? FI and I cut off around 16 or 17. I might say Sorry children under the age of "x" were not invited.
Posted by leopardgurl831[/QUOTE]

This. We had an unofficial age cutoff. I have one first cousin who is 10 and it's important to me that my first cousin who I've been babysitting since he was 2 month old be at my wedding. That said, I have a lot of older cousins who have little ones - none over the age of 6, so if they ask i'm going to say that my age cutoff is 10.

mandi921vh · March 2012

If you have a cut off age at say 17, then let them know that.

SunshineShades · March 2012

I agree with PPs I would just say "Sorry we are having an age cut off of 16 (or whatever) years". Like everyone says, just be prepared that they may not come to the wedding.
We are having a no kid wedding too. The exceptions are my niece (FG) and babies under 1 year (I have about 4 people who have babies only a few months old, so had to make that exception). The next youngest are 15 and 16 I think. If we had opened the wedding to kids, i counted... there would be 26+ additional guests lol.

classykat22 · March 2012

We limited kids to immediate family and WP only. Have already had guests try and add their kids. We just politely explained that we are only able to accommodate the kids that will be there (explained that they were family/WP) and that we hope they will still be able to join us. We didn't use the budget/space aspect but know that it's also an option if we need to.

Laurie109 · March 2012

Thanks ladies!!

AurorasEnvy · March 2012

I agree with the age cutoff thing =]

Egrauvog · March 2012

We are only having kids at the wedding who are our neices or nephews and then to of my cousin's kids because they actually know who I am

. I am about to send out invitations, but will also plan on explaining that we are only able to accomodate kids who we knew well. Plus a lot of the other kids are the kids of my cousins so I will have no problem politely explaining to them

LuckyHeather · March 2012

I have the same problem.

I invited 2 children outside of our family to the wedding. They are children of very close friends, who are always at our house (and us at theirs) and play with my son. I feel bad telling other parents "no" when I know we will have those 2 kids there, but I don't know the other people's kids...and if we opened it up to other kids the list would get way out of hand.

So we politely told her "No, we weren't planning on them coming to the wedding. Let me know if you have problems finding a sitter."

That went over well, and she found a sitter.

toothpastechica · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_i-know-weve-been-through-this-but-i-need-a-quick-answer-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:8b90a55a-e2be-4fd3-85f9-71c909b505d5Post:37217b28-5cbd-4719-b678-8641ff8cf981">Re: I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!</a>:
[QUOTE]I just have to laugh... I think we have about 25ish lil kids coming... heck our wedding party has 9 kids b/w 4 families. We decided early on to limit the list a little which means a couple of my friends with 3 and 6 kids in thier families just couldn't be included. Just call them... you have a perfectly reasonable position.
Posted by COSmitty[/QUOTE]

Hahah this is us too....we have 7 children under the age of 2, and pretty much any reletives or friends who we are not close to who had more then 3 children didnt make the list at all. I think explaining the age cut off NICELY is your best option, I wouldnt make an exeption for them unless there was good reason (theres actually no on on the planet who could babysit and they are flying across the country). You addressed the invite to who was invited, they need to respect that.

dori851 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_i-know-weve-been-through-this-but-i-need-a-quick-answer-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:8b90a55a-e2be-4fd3-85f9-71c909b505d5Post:ee82eaf8-b2af-44ff-bd5d-69cb0ed0a21e">Re: I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Did you have a set age cut off? FI and I cut off around 16 or 17. I might say Sorry children under the age of "x" were not invited.
Posted by leopardgurl831[/QUOTE]

We did this as well. That's the easiest way to do it without being unfair, hurting people's feelings, etc.

I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!

Re: I Know we've been through this ... but i need a quick answer!!! help!

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