September 2012 Weddings

Update on the forgetful GM issue

So FI brought up again sending the invites now to his GM and other people he really wants there.  Over half of "his side" is his extended family that we are inviting only to appease his mother (he has a huge extended family) and he doesn't care if they show up or not.  He said he's afraid people will make other plans if they don't have the invitation.  I was wary and you all advised against sending invites at different times yesterday.  But, I feel like him bringing it up everyday is him fearing that the few people he does want there won't come.  I only talk to one of the GM's wives/girlfriends (and that GM is on point, go figure).  The rest I'm not close with so aren't the constant reminders to their man that he is in a wedding on Sept 29.

I even said we should warn FMIL so she doesn't get fussy about why the family isn't getting invites yet.  He shrugged and said all he cares about (from his side) are the people he wants there and is sick of people trying to control our wedding.  I feel like for him to be worried about this it is a real concern of his and I should just give in to it.  I think it is interesting how this wedding brings out a lot of vulnerability in my FI.  Anyone else experiencing these kind of sensitivities with their FI?

Re: Update on the forgetful GM issue

  • Can you make a quick and east "save the date" that you send to the people that FI is concerned about?  I don't know how well it works, but you can even buy magnetic paper and just print your own. 
  • I noticed certain sensitivities too. He has been really hurt by our best man, who has blatantly chosen his princess gf over us repeatedly. Its not just a wedding issue, its a friendship one, and it hurts him badly that it's gotten this bad. I guess all you can do is go along with his wishes or provide a little guidance if these things are really bugging him.

  • There are definitely sensitivities coming out with FI regarding the wedding!
    As PP said, you could do some cute little magnet for him to give to just the people he's worried about! People LOVED our magnets :)
  • We did email STDs....FI just never gave me any of their emails.  We have our tasting in 2 weeks and idk if we are doing meal choices or not.  I asked FI if we could at least wait until then because if we end up doing meal choices and any of these people already RSVP'd, we are going to have to then get in touch with them about what they want to eat.  Too much work IMO.  So we agreed we'd send those people their invitations after the tasting.  Though the irony is we'll be seeing 4 of his 6 GM on the same trip as the tasting because we are also going to one of his GM's wedding that weekend! 
  • There's a time to be informal - shoot them a Facebook message and be like, "Hi, this is FI's fiancee!  I wanted to let you know to be sure to block off Sept 22nd for our wedding in Town, State.  I know it's super important to FI to have you there if you can make it, so I wanted to make sure you had plenty of notice to make plans.  If you have any questions, let me know!  Looking forward to hopefully seeing you there!"

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    Anniversary

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