Plus-Sized

I'm not dieting- not yet anyway- are you?

I'm curious to find out how many other brides aren't on a diet...I sometimes feel like I'm the only one who isn't trying to lose weight for the big day! I don't really know why not; I mean, I'm not skinny and am technically obese even though I carry my weight pretty well. (Fact: My dress was purchased in the largest size it comes in and it's a good three inches from closing- easily solved with a corset back.) And I'm not completely immune to getting down about my looks, I hate my gut and my thighs- and don't even get me started on how for all my extra padding I still have no boobs! I even know that the calorie counting works because at one point I was almost 30 pounds lighter and in the past two years I've gained it all back. But it's the size that I was when I first met my FI 4.5 years ago and I know he loves me no matter what. 

I  do believe in being healthy and eating right (I've been a vegan for about six years and always cook balanced meals for me and FI, who's omnivorous.) The truth is I have always been a bigger girl and even if I'm not always happy about the way I look, I am healthy. I don't even doubt that some day I will probably try to lose some weight again. But I can't imagine trying to plan a wedding and being at a new job (started in October, a few months after getting engaged) and attempting to lose weight all at the same time. I guess I had to pick two, so I decided planning a wedding day that we love and working hard at my job were it!

So if you're dieting or not dieting prior to your wedding, why or why not? I'd love to hear what everyone else thinks.
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Re: I'm not dieting- not yet anyway- are you?

  • I'm not dieting...  my dress fits as it is right now. But, I am starting to try to be more active. I wouldn't mind losing about 15-20 pounds before my first fitting. 

    I don't want to starve myself to get married though.  I want to try to tone my arms more, since I unexpectedly ended up with a strapless gown...  but, other than that, I just want to try to get my belly under control a little more... and lose a few pounds.   I don't want to be miserable for the next 4 1/2 months.
  • I'm not dieting per se either, I've simply wanted to be more active and eat healthier in general-not just for my wedding. I wouldn't mind if some weight comes off though! Like PP, I'd like to tone up my arms a little since I have a strapless dress.
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  • Oh, I hear that! My dress is strapless and my arms have some jiggle- not doing the bolero thing either because I'm gonna be hot enough without it in August! And I hate cap sleeves so there goes that option. 
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  • I am watching what I eat. I would like to lose 15-20 lbs before my wedding in September. This is just because I feel best at that weight and I want to feel as good as possible on my wedding day! I would love to tone my arms more too! UGH I hate my arms!
  • I'm kind of forced to diet these past few weeks.  Was recently diagnosed diabetic (I knew it was coming - I have diabetics on both sides of my family and I had gestational diabetes while I was pregnant) so I don't really have a choice.  The doc sent me to a dietician who put me on an 1800 calorie diabetic diet.  I just have to say that I have been a miserable beast and I'm ALWAYS starving!  But the good thing is, my numbers aren't THAT bad so I've been able to get by with just oral meds.  And I can't really cheat with them because if I eat too many carbs/sugars, I spend the whole day in the bathroom.  Awesome. 

    I lost 40lbs in the 8 months I was pregnant - wonder how much I can lose in a year.
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  • I am not dieting, but plan to when we get back from the honeymoon. (It's a little too late to plan to lose for the wedding..it's in 6 days.) I gained quite a bit after FI & I started dating. The fact that I had a baby certainly didn't help. I've lost all of my baby weight, and have maintained my pre-baby weight for about a year now, but I was still quite heavy before getting pregnant and could stand to lose 50+lbs. After getting engaged, I kept telling myself I would try to lose weight before the wedding, and I always kept telling myself I had time. Around the beginning of the year, I just decided to make it my goal not to GAIN weight before the wedding. With all the stress of wedding planning, working 50+ hours a week, going to school, being a mom, keeping up with all the housework and everything else I do, I knew the added stress of trying to reach a goal weight just wasn't worth it. Do I wish I could be thinner for my wedding? Absolutely! But I'm not going to beat myself up for it. My FI loves me whether I'm a size 2 or a size 20. Once we get back from the honeymoon, I'll have a little bit of stress off my shoulders and some extra free time (no classes over the summer) and I can focus more on weight loss. Thinking I might try Weight Watchers again..that's how I lost all my baby weight.
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  • I'm pretty "meh" about it. I've gotten more active and I eat better, but I was working on that before the engagement. Like PPs, said, I'm more target oriented at this point, if I can just tone my arms enough so I don't feel like they look like Christmas hams, my dress will cover up or squeeze in the rest (thank you ball gowns with corset backs!). I refuse to Master Cleanse my starving way for the next 6 months. FI would hate it, and I would hate myself.

    I have had a lot of issues with disordered eating in my past, so when I start to think about dieting it can lead down a really slippery slope of crazy. I prefer me healthy and able to eat like normal people to weird and obsessive. 
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  • I'm not specifically dieting for the wedding, or dieting at all.  It has been motivation to try to stay active and eat healthier in general, but I was trying to do that before we got engaged.  I'm trying to work on the long range plan, and just keep being active and eating a moderate amount of healthy meals while enjoying the not so healthy items on occasion.

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  • I'm not dieting per-se, but I have started actively food logging and exercising. I lost 90 lbs about 4 years ago and was the smallest I'd ever been in my life, but because I did it thru medical weight loss and eating those fake protein powders, it wasn't sustainable weight loss. I gained almost all of it back within 2 years.

    I'll admit the thought of getting married and all the wedding photos and eyes on me was definitely the motivating factor to losing weight again, but this time I want to do it the right way and keep it off forever. It's been slow going, but I'm looking at it as a lifestyle change, not a diet. I still eat all of the things I want to do, I'm just teaching myself moderation. I have cut out a lot of fast food, but that's purely out of not enjoying it very much anymore.

    I think it's a mistake to put off till tomorrow what you COULD start today. For all you brides thinking you're too busy, you're not. Even if you just start looking at how you're eating you can make positive changes that will impact your whole lifestyle in a positive way.
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  • im doing weight watchers
  • I dieted for the wedding.  H and I got engaged in August 2010, and looking at photos from Christmas 2010 I was disgusted with myself; I didn't want my wedding photos to look like that.  So I started a very regimented diet* and by June 2011 I was down 50 pounds.  I got to re-order my dress two sizes smaller and I felt AMAZING on my wedding day (and for the first time in a long time was comfortable in a swim suit in public, which was important since we honeymooned in Hawaii).

    I've gained some of it back in the last 9 months, but not b/c the weightloss wasn't sustainable - simply b/c I started making food choices I KNEW were wrong.  I actually re-started my diet last week and am counting on being back in wedding shape or better by our 1 yr anniversary in July :-)

    *while the very regimented diet might sound painful for some it's important for me; I have a hard time with portion control - if you tell me I can have some bread next thing you know the whole basket is gone at a restaurant.  The diet I'm on allows me to eat as much as I want as long as it's the right foods and it has worked WONDERS for me (and my mom, and several of H's cousins, and a few friends who all started it after being inspired by my weightloss)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_im-not-dieting-not-yet-anyway-are-you?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:b8f0e72e-fb71-4560-9a0e-56c6aa63952cPost:11ab75ce-6749-465c-bd07-8064d6b7c6ce">Re: I'm not dieting- not yet anyway- are you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I*while the very regimented diet might sound painful for some it's important for me; I have a hard time with portion control - if you tell me I can have some bread next thing you know the whole basket is gone at a restaurant.  The diet I'm on allows me to eat as much as I want as long as it's the right foods and it has worked WONDERS for me (and my mom, and several of H's cousins, and a few friends who all started it after being inspired by my weightloss)
    Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

    May i ask what program... I am working with a training and doing lots of cardo and i think i need to follow something more for my diet - the trainer is pushing me to eat for my blood type but i am not into that style -  I want something i can do forever - looking great in pictures is a plus but I need to lose for my health and to have a child one day - i qualify for WLS but i dont want to have to wait the 2 years after before i can get pregnant. thanks :)
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  • @ kate61487 May i ask what program... I am working with a training and doing lots of cardo and i think i need to follow something more for my diet - the trainer is pushing me to eat for my blood type but i am not into that style -  I want something i can do forever - looking great in pictures is a plus but I need to lose for my health and to have a child one day - i qualify for WLS but i dont want to have to wait the 2 years after before i can get pregnant. thanks :)
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  • I am dieting, but I get really frustrated when everyone thinks it is just because I am getting married.  I have always been unhappy with my wait and how I look in pictures.

    I will say I have been more successful at keeping to it and being more active as the wedding approaches.  I think it is just the extra motivation and not a reason though.  I plan  on taking a breif break on my honeymoon and then getting right back on track after.

    I just track my caloreis and try to work out at least five days a week.  I would like to drop another 15 pounds by the wedding and I know it won't be easy!  Even if I hit that goal, I will still want to lose another 30-40 pounds over then next year or so.  I am working to be healthy and confident, not for one day of my life (even if it is a BIG day).
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  • Question for all you dieters- how do you count calories if you do your own cooking?? I do 99% of my own cooking so there's no calorie count to them. And I can't really cut a ton out of my diet or use WW recipes because most of those aren't vegan (no egg, dairy, meat- including fish and chicken, honey, gelatin) so how do I monitor my calorie intake? 
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  • Guess I'm jumping in late, but hope you don't mind!
    As my first disclaimer, I did not diet for the wedding, but I am trying to tone up for the honeymoon.  I was overweight for about 95% of my life and, quite honestly, found nothing wrong with that, and do not feel that anyone should, provided you are still in good health.  For me, I can't explain it, but I simply changed my mind one day, and started down a different path.

    Random-I pretty much ONLY cooked in while I underwent the largest portion of my weight loss journey (100 lbs), and am still finding it the better alternative while losing the last few inches and attempting to tone (though not doing so well at it right now!)  You'd be surprised how much you can find online with comparable calorie counts on livestrong and other sites.  
    If you can't find anything close, you can take the calories of the key ingredients, and then google search your method of cooking.  The key things with cooking are to be careful of your ingredients, oils/butters, and cooking method. I try to steam most things, no matter if on the stove, in the microwave, or in the oven.  I have lots of healthy and yummy recipes if you're ever in need of some new ideas!
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  • Kate61487 - I'm also very curious as to what your diet was.  I have about the same time and I'd love to lose about 40 lbs.

    To the OP - I am dieting.  Or should I say very closely watching what I eat and going to the gym.  This is going to be one of the most important days of my life, and I don't want to look back on pictures and be disappointed in how I look.  I can push aside a vacation picture I don't like, but wedding pictures are forever.  :)

  • I don't really fry anything anymore- if I'm cooking on the stovetop then it's either by boiling or sauteing with the zero-calorie cooking spray (I don't know how those manage to be zero calorie and still work!) I bake a lot of things and usually buy fresh produce instead of using  canned or jarred- the exception being spaghetti sauce and beans. I will try to find something comparable online to help me get some idea but I'm surprisingly useless with the internet! I do realize when some of my meals are less light than others- and I eat whole grains, no white bread or white rice in our house! 

    I've just always been heavier and also healthy and while I do have some clothes in my closet that used to fit and unfortunately don't right now, I have never been a size 4 and can't really imagine it other than I would probably look A LOT more like my sister, hah. Like, supposedly the healthy weight for me would be 124lbs- I don't think I've been that light since grade school! I want to be realistic about being healthy and notbe lazy about my health but also fully realize the fact that you can be bigger and healthy (like I am.) I guess on some level I wonder if I should just be happy that I don't have any health issues and not be so focused on the number on the scale...

    Btw, congrats on the weight loss, that is really amazing!
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  • I don't like to say I am dieting for the wedding. I lost 120 and kept about 90 of it off in the past 9 years... slowly 30 of it crept back on.I am not happy with how i look. my Fi knows i am not happy... it is a change of life for me and i know that. i lost the 120 the old fashion way.. watching what i was eating and working out.I guess my motivation was getting my wedding dress. they made me order a 18... i knew I was going to be higher then i was in normal clothes.. but I want to look like i did 4 years ago.
    So i started an app on my phone called LOSEIT i love it. i scan the food i am eating and it counts the calories for me.  i put in that i wan to lose 2 pounds a week, so i am on a 1260 calorie a diet a day... a little extream but i need to kick start.
    started on sunday and already down 2.8 pounds.

    But just remember, if you are happy with the way you look, just keep remembering that.
    If you want to lose weight, don't set your goals to high. I would love to lose 5 pounds a month. it's not gonna happen

    You didn't put it on over night, it's not gonna come off over night!

    Good Luck girls! Be Happy!
  • i am dieting...but i have been dieting for a long long time.....i started doing it for health reasons...my blood pressure was really high...and i am really motivated to fit into that dress perfectly and i want to look back and know that i did everything i possible could to look my best on my wedding day
  • I am about to buckle down and get ready for it. I have flucuated A LOT in weight since I met my fiance 6 years ago. I would really like to lose 50 lbs in a year. I lost 50 lbs in 6 months, so I know it's more than possible. I really don't want to be a fat bride!!
  • I'm not. I refuse to put that kind of pressure on myself when planning a wedding is pressure in itself.  I've also struggled with an eating disorder in the past, and I don't want to get back into the binge cycle again.  Too much restriction will trigger that.  I'm mainly focusing on cooking good healthy meals and making good choices as often as I can, not beating myself up if I don't, being as active as possible, and keeping my blood sugar under control.  FI really wants to eat healthier too, so I'm working on providing that for us both. 
  • I am dieting. At work we started a Biggest Loser contest- winner gets the money we put in to enter and if you gain a week you pay an additional $2. Could really use the money for the wedding & it's great motivation to find a more comfortable me !

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  • I'm so dieting!!  Wedding date set for June 1, 2013.  I'm going to start looking for dresses 6 months before and I def. want to lose 50 pounds before then!!

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_im-not-dieting-not-yet-anyway-are-you?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:b8f0e72e-fb71-4560-9a0e-56c6aa63952cPost:d4f2226a-394b-41ca-8eac-90f2d616f87c">Re: I'm not dieting- not yet anyway- are you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am dieting. At work we started a Biggest Loser contest- winner gets the money we put in to enter and if you gain a week you pay an additional $2. Could really use the money for the wedding & it's great motivation to find a more comfortable me !
    Posted by ajbankos[/QUOTE]
  • Jlp818Jlp818 member
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    I have about a year and a half before our wedding and I am getting back into working out and eating really healthy (and on weight watchers).    Obviously I want to look good and get fit (def have to when we are ready to try to have a baby) but honestly a small part of me is doing it for everyone else.   My Fiance is an awesome guy and my family is really great but i do get "gently" pressured to lose weight (well sometimes greatly pressured).    I love myself and I don't have low self esteem at all, it's definately a hard struggle because i have that damn sweet tooth and lazy a*s gene.  I don't want to regret not looking perfect in the dress!!

    But seriously getting to the gym sucks but the results are so sweet. 
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