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Wedding Party??? What Do I Do?

RichNicci4211122RichNicci4211122
100 Comments
in August 2012 Weddings

When FI picked our wedding party we picked our best friends who are husband and wife couples.  Well to make a long story short our BM and MOH have been going through a really rough patch in their relationship and have decided to get a divorce.  So do I ask them to step down so not to cause them any more undue stress or do I let them continue with their duties?  I want both of them to be there of course.  But with the decision just made last night I'm afraid that if I say something to one of them that I will seem like their problems don't matter and that the only thing that matters to me is the wedding.  UGH Please I need opinions on this one....

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Re: Wedding Party??? What Do I Do?

  • dawnp917dawnp917
    500 Comments
    I would not ask them to step down. I am sure they can put their feelings aside for one day. If they feel like it will be too much for them they will say something.

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  • DeClue82DeClue82
    500 Comments
    I agree with PP, I would talk to her and mention it... and just make sure she/he is still comfortable... but with the wedding so close I'm sure they are both planning on continuing what they started and being there for you...
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  • m tullim tulli member
    100 Comments
    I wouldn't ask them to step down. If I was them I would feel hurt. Maybe wait a week and just check in on her and ask if there is anything she needs. Is it a messy devorce? If not then I'm sure they will be fine. I just wouldn't do a bridal party dance or anything like that.
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  • tingeytrontingeytron member
    10 Comments
    I agree, don't ask them to step down. I'm sure it will be difficult, but helping you with your wedding might help them get through the pain- you know, doing normal things to help distract you?
    Good luck.
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  • KT020803KT020803
    100 Comments

    I agree with the PP, don't ask them to step down, but maybe in a week ask your MOH her feelings on it. Does she want you to reaarange where people stand so she doesn't have to walk with him. Also let your photographer know so they aren't making them in 'couple poses' which could be tense.

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  • LibbyC730LibbyC730 member
    100 Comments
    Good advice by all PPs.  If it was just decided very recently, I would definitely give them some time.  Divorce may not be their final decision after all.  Definitely talk with your MOH after giving it some time, see how she's feeling and what would make her most comfortable.  I'm not sure if you have other BM's, but maybe they could step up and help with some responsibilities that MOH was taking on.  Best of luck to the both of them.
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