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Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

So, what's your opinion about...

Adult Ring Bearers and Flower Girls. The idea seems interesting. My friend has asked me to be what she calls a Flower maiden. And my boy friend is her ring bearer. He is almost 30 and I am 25. At first I thought it was cute, but now it is getting old trying to explain it to people, so when they ask I say I am a BM. I should mention that the reason she has adults in these roles is because it is A) a child free wedding(which I can deal with I don't have kids) and b) she really wanted us in her wedding party (her FI and my boyfriend are good friends, neither of them cared either way.) Her bridal party is six people. 3 MOH and 3 Flower Maidens. (Which has become a cute name for BM) I think it is unique and cute. What do you think?

Re: So, what's your opinion about...

  • I think it's kind of weird to have an adult FG and RB....those roles are more geared towards children IMHO.

     

  • I find it sort of strange, but if you can bride are both happy with it, there is no reason not to do it.
  • As long as you aren't forced to wear a little-girly dress, put your hair in pigtails, and scatter petals, then I don't see why it matters what you are called. 

    Personally, I don't like the idea of using cute little kids as props in weddings.....but as adults you are free to consent for yourselves, and you understand what marriage is enough to decide if you support it.  So yeah, as long as you are okay with it, I don't think it's a big deal.
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  • I think it's a bit odd but there is nothing wrong with it as long as all parties are happy.
     
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  • I don't get it.  I don't know why she wouldn't just ask you to be a BM.  

    It kind of comes off as a runner up BM.  
  • It's weird. And why are there 3 "flowermaidens"? She needs to make you all bridesmaids. And if you're last to walk down and happen to scatter some petals, so be it. The last wedding I went to, 10 yrs ago, had the best man hold the rings because there was no ring bearer.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_so-whats-your-opinion-about?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:43feddc9-0a7c-469e-a07e-af4b8a973b94Post:d3ba0dd8-7417-46d4-b734-e44781eee061">Re: So, what's your opinion about...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't get it.  I don't know why she wouldn't just ask you to be a BM.   It kind of comes off as a runner up BM.  
    Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

    This.  And ditto just making everyone a BM, that's kind of extra.
  • Yeah... weird, awkward and apparently no different than being a bridesmaid. Except for having a really bizarre title.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_so-whats-your-opinion-about?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:43feddc9-0a7c-469e-a07e-af4b8a973b94Post:3f9336b3-b127-4d7d-ad08-004d2a4f2033">Re:So, what's your opinion about...</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's weird. And why are there 3 "flowermaidens"? She needs to make you all bridesmaids. And if you're last to walk down and happen to scatter some petals, so be it. The last wedding I went to, 10 yrs ago, had the best man hold the rings because there was no ring bearer.
    Posted by hannahmassey[/QUOTE]

    I have <u>never</u> been to a wedding with either a ring bearer or flower girl.  I've only seen this ... The bride's honor attendant holds the groom's ring and the groom's honor attendant hold's the bride's ring.
  • Honestly, I would totally roll my eyes at that- even the use of 'flower maiden'. Why not just be included as BMs? Would you actually throw flower petals? 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_so-whats-your-opinion-about?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:43feddc9-0a7c-469e-a07e-af4b8a973b94Post:fc7d6a7d-04be-41ca-8c21-0a829069a085">Re: So, what's your opinion about...</a>:
    [QUOTE]OffBeat Bride had an article about a grown man (and a comedian) being the flower girl. I thought it was fantastic. 
    Posted by Harry87[/QUOTE]

    This happened at one of my friends wedding, thier friend (who is kinda a 'goofy' personality) asked if he could be the flowerboy. He was 24...so i have seen it done...can be cool with right personalities

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  • I find it a little odd. I think having someone who is a comedien or doing it in a funny way is one thing and would find that amusing, but it basically sounds like the three of you are just runner-up BMs. She should have just called you all bridesmaids.


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  • It does seem like you three are actually just BMs and I don't get the cutsey title thing?

    OTOH, one of my friends is going to be a flower girl at another friend's wedding and is uber excited about it. She's small and adorable so they thought it would fit her, and her guide dog will be the ring bearer.
  • We are bridesmaids with cutsey titles. I mean she doesn't have any BMs, just us and her 3 MOH. She just wanted all of us in her party from the looks of it. Her sister, cousin, three childhood friends and me who has known her for 4 years,
  • 3 MOHs and 3 "flower maidens?"  

    That particular composition sounds like an A list and a B list for bridesmaids to be honest. 


  • I'm doing this for our wedding - my best friend (now 27) was never in a wedding as a kid, and waaay before I got engaged she told me how much she wanted to still be a flower girl, even if it was seen as being silly. There was no question I wanted her in my bridal party, so per her wish I asked her to be my flower girl, and she is beyond thrilled. I've only had to explain it a few times, but if ppl ask me in passing about the weddingI refer to her as a bridesmaid to make it easier/faster. If the adult flower girls like their role, then who cares?
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  • I would be mortified if anyone referred to me as a "flower maiden". Shakespeare would have had a field day making puns about that. 
  • I have never heard of that before. It sounds weird, I hope he isnt made fun of too much for being a 30 ring bearer...
  • My aunt got married a few years ago, and had her son (mid20s) and her hubby's neice (mid20s) as her ring bearer and flowergirl.  It was cute.  No one thought it was weird.  I think it's fine if that's what you want to do. 
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  • I would prefer adults rather than children either way becuase then you can be sure it will be done correctly.
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