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Odd Question for Coordinator

KateH2013KateH2013
100 Comments 5 Love Its First Anniversary
in Destination Weddings Discussions
So, I've found another coordination company that's available for our new wedding date. Before I sign the contract with her I have a strange question to ask but am not sure how to word it. My FI feels strongly about having a male officiant marry us (I think because growing up he's never seen a female officiate and it's his way of making his parents happy since we're not getting married in a church). How do I politely ask her who the officiant is, and if it's possible to have a man marry us? I worry about offending her :-/
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Re: Odd Question for Coordinator

  • TerriHuggTerriHugg member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Love Its First Answer
    I don't think it's weird at all. In fact, I believe a few religions won't even allow male officiants. I don't practice the faith, but I think the Catholic religion is one of them. 

    I personally don't think it would be offensive to ask if you have a male. As long as you don't say, we don't trust females so we need to have a male or something like that. 

    Maybe you can ask what officiants that they do have and have the coordinator send you the names and information on them. From there, you can pick out the male names (assuming they won't be any unisex names to confuse you) and go from there.

    Or maybe you can simply say, you prefer a male officiant. You need to tell her the reason behind it. 

    But it's so nice that you are concerned about offending her. I think if you were asking a female officiant you run a greater risk of offending her. But since it's the coordinator and she's probably gotten much stranger requests you should be fine. 


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  • JennyR01JennyR01
    100 Comments
    She's probably heard it before. My FI asked our coordinator for a male officiant. He says it's because we saw a wedding out there last year and the lady officiating was unimpressive. I don't care either way, but he was assured that it would be no problem to get a male minister for our ceremony.
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  • Julyet06Julyet06 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    I also say it's not odd at all and would be okay to request a male officiant :-)
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  • cevans11cevans11
    100 Comments
    I agree with above posters, and don't think it's odd. I think you could phrase the request exactly how you explained it in your post, and avoid offending anyone. 
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