Are my reception plans rude and unrealistic?

Re: Are my reception plans rude and unrealistic?

• Melissa.hylton

  

  April 2012

  It sounds more like you are into the band then you are with the idea of having a reception. A little mingling wont hurt becuase not everyone likes to dance or they are embrassed to dance. You dont have to constantly mingle but make sure you do a round before dinner and after dinner just to cover the basis. 4 hrs of dancing is a long time also. The band isnt going to take a break for 4 hrs? 

  

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• LADY324

  

  April 2012

  If you are doing a receiving line you are fine not to go table to table.  We are not going table to table we have 22 tables if we spend 5 minutes at each table that is almost 2 hours for just saying hi to people.  We are attending our cocktail hour and plan on saying hi to as many people as we can then. 
  
  I plan on dancing as much as possible as well.  But I think you need to have the mind set that it is your wedding.  Not you attending someone else's when you are used to dancing all night long.  So you do have to make it a point to not cut people off if they are trying to talk to you.  Everyone says that the night flies by so fast and I believe my shower flew in the blink of an eye!  So make sure you dance with your girlfriends to several songs, slow dance with FI and make sure to say hi to as many people as you can without it consuming your entire night.
  
  My FMIL is very old school so I am sure she is going to be mad that we are not going table to table to say hi to people but I really don't care. 

  

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• ceglare4

  

  April 2012 edited April 2012

  I would take the time to visit with all of your guests at their tables during the reception too. I was in a wedding two years ago that had a receiving line and also talked to everyone at the reception. They weren't on the dance floor as much as us (the WP), but they still had a good time (and a good balance of everything).
  
  We also went to a wedding a year and a half ago where the bride and groom had a receiving line and didn't go around to the tables at the reception. I honestly thought they were rude not to, even though they had a line. They also didn't feed us during the 2 hours they took pics, and it was a cash bar, so maybe I was bitter about that too lol.

  

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• penny12986 member

  

  April 2012

  A lot of people will also just approach you to mingle as well so you will have the chance to say hi to them when you get up to cut the cake and such. 
  
  As you go back and forth to the dance floor, take a different route each time and you can pass by different tables to greet people.  It will take less time than you think and if you are getting cornered by some guests, give your FI or friend a signal so they will know to rescue you.

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• butterflyjumper1

  

  April 2012

  I think you need to go from table to table even if you are having a receiving line.  I was at a wedding last month that had a receiving line, but then did not go table to table, and I heard lots of grumblings from guests about how they considered that to be rude. 
  
  I think it is somewhat unrealistic to expect to not leave the dance floor.  My fiance and I are party animals and are always that crazy couple doing their own weird thing on the dance floor even when no one else is out there dancing.  We hope to do a fair amount of dancing at our own wedding, but we know that we will need to spend lots of time off the dance floor too in order to chat with our guests and make everyone feel welcome.  We will make our "rounds" after we finish eating (we plan to at least eat part of our meals!), do some dancing, then will be prepared to scoot on and off the dance floor in order to spend time chatting with guests before they leave for the evening.

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• k8888

  

  April 2012

  Am I being unrealistic in thinking that I will be able to spend majority of my time on the dance floor? - Most likely, yes
  
  Will I be considered rude if I'm not constantly mingling with my guests at the reception? - Constantly mingling is not necessary, but if you don't plan on mingling at all, that is definitely rude.  Not everyone coming to your reception may be coming to the ceremony, so to totally not say hello to your guests is just plain rude.  You're going to have to sacrifice some dancing/reception time to meet and greet your guests.  They're there to see you, afterall.
  
  Just my opinion! 

  
  
  

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• bridetobe71412

  

  April 2012

  To answer your question, no, it's not necessarily rude per se, but yes, it's unrealistic.
  
  The reason I say that it's unrealistic is that you're going to be pulled in all different directions the whole day. I've seen it happen at every single wedding with the bride and groom and this is for receptions with receiving lines and without receiving lines.
  
  You may have big plans to spend the whole night dancing and enjoying the band, but the reception is really a thank you to your guests and you should put their comfort/happiness above yours. That may be hard to hear, but it's really true.  Not to say you shouldn't enjoy your reception; but you should really go around and spend time with everyone who took time out of their lives to come to your ceremony and witness your marriage. I would definitely notice it if a bride & groom didn't.
  
  Also, just a side note: Many people have told me this, and I'll agree - you should stick by your fiance's side for most of the night. People will want to see you guys together, too. I've heard on numerous occasions people say something like "I really wish I would have spent more time with [husband] on our wedding day."
  
  Just my two cents. Take it or leave it

  

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• michelle11988 member

  

  April 2012

  I think you should go around and talk to your guests at the reception.  I agree that it would come across as rude if you have just the receiving line and not planning on mingling at all.  I think you need to have a balance of both dancing and mingling.

  
  
  

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• xobride

  

  April 2012

  I LOVE to dance so I feel your pain here, but I agree with PPs that it's unrealistic and honestly rude.  I know it's too late to change things now, but we are only doing a 2 hour reception with a post-reception dance party following so I can visit with my guests and then be able to dance as well.  There will be a dance floor at the reception and the second half of the playlist is more upbeat, but I'm not sure how much dancing will actually happen.
  
  I have a couple of suggestions.  Don't limit your dancing to just the dance floor.  I'm known to dance anywhere, anytime regardless of a dance floor so feel free to boogie anywhere.  Also, talk to the band about playing your favorite songs towards the end of the night when most of the guests who aren't going to dance anyway have left and the ones still there will be joining you on the dance floor.

  

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• arunkumar

  

  April 2012

  Thanks ladies for your input. Your suggestions were all good and I needed a reality check. The band is not just for me but for my guests as well. I really want my guests to enjoy themselves. I will do table visits but I probably won't do them all at once. I definitely want to spend a lot of time with my FI at the reception, but he is completely fine with me dancing without him at times, so we'll try to compromise and do an equal amount of dancing and mingling.
  
  I'm sure on the day of my wedding, I'll want to hang out with my guests and mingle more than actually dance. They are the big reason why I'm having the reception in the first place!  I'm sure I'll have more time to spend on the dance floor later in the evening too when some guests have already left.

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• NIKKIANDTYE member

  

  April 2012

  It's ok to be on the dance floor but, you also should go around and great your guest just to show them you appreciate them being there to share your day with you

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• SHarrison2112 member

  

  April 2012

  I think it might be a unrealistic, not necessarily rude. You want to enjoy what your paying for and thats understandable. But your guests have traveled and took time our of their day and/or week(end) to share and celebrate your marriage. To assume no one is going to "distract" you from dancing is just simply not true. Its like any other party people want to talk and socialize with you and there is nothing wrong with that but to be intensionally avoiding guests or not acknowledging them so you can dance might send them the wrong impression. In the end Its your wedding and its ultimately your decision. I wish you the best! 

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