Awkward Question

vysabelle · May 2011

I keep getting the "How much is the wedding gonna cost you guys?" or "How much are you paying per person?" questions. I am not sure how to tell them its none of their business without sounding rude.

aragx6 · May 2011

If you're not comfortable talking about that with people, simply saying you're not comfortable talking about that should be sufficient.

Some people hate talking about money and others don't have a major problem with it.

jsleik · May 2011

If they as the per person price, you can always say that you haven't really figured it out that way and you're still finalizing things, so don't have an answer on the overall cost. Be vague and make it clear you couldn't answer their *very rude* question on the spot.

noodle_oo · May 2011

Those always make me cringe. Honestly, i don't really care about talking about money with some people, but it has come to bite me in the butt later. So I try not to discuss it anymore. So when people asked, I'd say something vague like "oh, it is not too bad" or "we're getting a good deal, don't worry". Then change the subject. Usually people got the hint.

But yeah, it makes me uncomfortable!

Celles · May 2011

"Enough so that you had better be bringing a damn good present to cover your plate!"

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · May 2011

"enough" or "weddings are expensive!" then change the subject.

Beachy730 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_awkward-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b153105-95d5-4019-811d-6249a26e82b4Post:14a5f6a3-8bcd-4819-8f3a-6709ae0f646f">Awkward Question</a>:
[QUOTE]I keep getting the "How much is the wedding gonna cost you guys?" or "How much are you paying per person?" questions. I am not sure how to tell them its none of their business without sounding rude.
Posted by vysabelle[/QUOTE]

You can either be blunt and say you aren't comfortable sharing that, or just play dumb and say you aren't keeping track of it.

Truthfully though I think it depends on who it's coming from you as to whether or not I'll tell them. H and I have several friends who are engaged now or looking to get engaged soon. Some have asked us for an idea of what our reception cost, and I don't have a problem telling them. But when it's just nosy family members or random people, I play dumb.

jemmini6 · May 2011

I just always answer "Oh, more than I'd like...I can't believe how expensive weddings are, but it will be a good time."

SereJane · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_awkward-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b153105-95d5-4019-811d-6249a26e82b4Post:7040edd9-1620-4b3f-9592-911fd793a03f">Re: Awkward Question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Awkward Question : You can either be blunt and say you aren't comfortable sharing that, or just play dumb and say you aren't keeping track of it. Truthfully though I think it depends on who it's coming from you as to whether or not I'll tell them. <strong>H and I have several friends who are engaged now or looking to get engaged soon. Some have asked us for an idea of what our reception cost, and I don't have a problem telling them.</strong> But when it's just nosy family members or random people, I play dumb.
Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

Same here, because I know they are asking so they can work on their own planning, not to be nosy.

SteveandKris · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_awkward-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b153105-95d5-4019-811d-6249a26e82b4Post:7040edd9-1620-4b3f-9592-911fd793a03f">Re: Awkward Question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Awkward Question : You can either be blunt and say you aren't comfortable sharing that, or just play dumb and say you aren't keeping track of it. Truthfully though I think it depends on who it's coming from you as to whether or not I'll tell them. <strong> H and I have several friends who are engaged now or looking to get engaged soon. Some have asked us for an idea of what our reception cost, and I don't have a problem telling them.</strong> But when it's just nosy family members or random people, I play dumb.
Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

I'd answer for these people only... everyone else I tell about the "good neighbor" discount I'm getting from Penn for being a Drexel Alum :)

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_awkward-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b153105-95d5-4019-811d-6249a26e82b4Post:7040edd9-1620-4b3f-9592-911fd793a03f">Re: Awkward Question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Awkward Question : You can either be blunt and say you aren't comfortable sharing that, or just play dumb and say you aren't keeping track of it. Truthfully though I think it depends on who it's coming from you as to whether or not I'll tell them. H and I have several friends who are engaged now or looking to get engaged soon. Some have asked us for an idea of what our reception cost, and I don't have a problem telling them. But when it's just nosy family members or random people, I play dumb.
Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I think that's key with everything. Like if someone asks how much X costs, you can usually figure out if it's because they're doing research or if they're just nosy.

unplainjane · May 2011

the only people that have asked me this question are people that are generally rude or awkward with other conversations as well so i just respond i'd rather not say. that shuts down the conversation pretty quick. it's actually shocking random people ask that question.

Kristin789 · May 2011

Here you go:

"My parents are hosting the wedding. You could call my dad and ask - he's home after 6:30 any weeknight except Tuesday when he plays poker with his friends."

"Well, traditionally the bride's parents host the wedding, and that's what my parents are doing. You can call my dad and ask him - he's home after 6:30 any weekday except Tuesday which is his poker night."

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