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Money Dance?

cristinah86cristinah86 member
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in Wedding Reception Forum

Heres the deal.  We are going to Hawaii on our honeymoon and my uncle (also the bartender) wants to put a "tip jar" at the bar for our honeymoon fund.  The alcohol will be free ofcourse.  Also, my mom and MIL keep insisting that we do a "money dance".  Where people can pay to dance with the bride and groom.  Is it just me or will there be too much begging for money going on?!  I'm thinking of scratching the money dance idea.  Although the extra cash would be nice for our trip.  What to do?!

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Re: Money Dance?

  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Just say no.  

    You're right, a "tip jar" and a money dance are just begging for money, and are going to make you look like you are using your wedding for a fundraiser, not a celebration.  If people want to give you cash to help with your honeymoon, they will.  But don't ask for it.
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  • CA2MT4EveRCA2MT4EveR member
    1000 Comments
    I'm not a huge fan of them, but in some social circles they are so common people look funny if they don't do them.  Up here they do a garter auction and the last person to throw in money gets the garter. I have seen the garter go in upwards of $1,000 and people just expect it and bring a 20 or two to the wedding because they know the garter will be auctioned. I'm glad I'm not getting married where that happens.
    dont make ur password so easy. gbck2CA2 hahahaha
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  • twilight.rosetwilight.rose member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I don't think a "tip jar" is ever acceptable at a wedding, and I think money dances are appropriate only when it is culturally or regionally the norm.
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  • jenn.danieljenn.daniel
    2500 Comments
    don't have a tip jar, and don't do a money dance.  You're right, you don't want to beg for money at your wedding.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Not a fan of either.  The guests are already giving their time, perhaps expenses for travel and lodging for the wedding, in addition to giving a gift.  I think that putting out blatant pleas for cash in the form of a tip jar and/or money dance is very unfortuante.

    FWIW:  I married into a family that ALWAYS did and still does a money dance.  We didn't.  The ceiling didn't fall in, and we still get invited to family events.  Just because a family ALWAYS does something: you are not required to follow suit if it makes you uncomfortable.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • mysticlmysticl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    The bridal dance is a tradition in my family and my friends so I wouldn't see that as odd, seeing as it is a cultural tradition.  I've never heard of a tip jar being as any kind of tradition.  Combine it with a bridal dance and it could look greedy. 
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  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    Tip jar = NO

    Dollar Dance = If it's part of your ethnic culture or local customs, it may be okay. I wouldn't do it though
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  • alithebridealithebride member
    Ninth Anniversary 2500 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    so the guests would think they're tipping the bartender but it's really your HM fund? irritatingly sneaky!!!

    dollar dance? ugh.

    dance iwth your guests for free and forego the shady jar.

     

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  • kimp67kimp67 member
    500 Comments

    We're doing a "bridal dance" (what it's called around here) because it's part of our tradition/custom.  I think a tip jar at the bar when it's not for the bartender isn't right.

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