Honeymoon Registry

adktd2boots · February 2012

So I understand now why ladies come to TK asking about Honeymoon Registries and think they are such an awesome idea. Yesterday while I was at the bridal show, my friend won a $25 gift certificate to the travel company. She went to find out what it was for, and they told her "you can put it towards your HM registry!" and went off on how cool they are. There was a huge SANDALS sign and I imagine they told anyone who went to their table they could do that.

She walked back to me and started talking about how cool that was and how she and her FI really want to go to Hawaii, but they don't know that they can afford it, now if they register they might be able to.

We aren't close enough for me to say "NO! That's a CRAP idea!" So I just kinda played dumb and said "Don't you want cool new stuff for your house?"

kellycatalo · February 2012

yeah, when i first heard about the whole idea (WAY before getting engaged even), i thought it was pretty cool. i had no idea it was a scam, etc.

after coming hear and learning about it and really realizing what it meant, i can see how people can easily be tricked if they don't have anyone to tell them otherwise.

DirtyWater · February 2012

My cousin registered for real things and then did a honeymoon registry from Marriott. I'm not sure how many people actually contributed to that registry but they were able to say at a bunch of their hotels for 2 weeks in Florida.

I understand why people do them for excursions or spending money, but I don't think I would ever do it.

kirab2 · February 2012

i dont get it... sorry im retarded haha

SCogs18 · February 2012

I would have just tried to explain to her that most of the time, the HM Registry just takes a percentage of the gift and then often just writes you a check and not point our how incredibly rude they are. That way she can see how it doesn't benefit her.

I thought they were a neat idea until I learned how they actually work.

akbrown19 · February 2012

A lot of people have differing opinions about honeymoon registries. That said, my FI and I are setting one up because we have a house and all the items we need. I found a credible website that arranges for your guests to essentially choose an item or event on your honeymoon they would like to purchase/sponsor, and then they are responsible for writing a check or giving you cash personally at your wedding. That way there is limited third party involvement. I have talked to several relatives about this idea and they all think it works well for our situation, so I know my guests won't find it overly tacky. Plus, for those that do want to purchase an item and not give money, we have set up an extremely small gift registry. Just wanted to point out that there are feasible, secure options for those who would like to go that route.

mamameech · February 2012

eHoneymoon.com only gets 3% of the money contributed to our honeymoon registry, instead of the usual 7-10%. And it's really cute how we can make it look like ppl are buying us scuba lessons or excursions but really the money is just going towards a pot for our honeymoon (or really whatever we choose - but it would be honeymoon). It's linked with paypal, so we just get the money at the end.

This is ours: http://www.ehoneymoonregistry.com/couples/view/1524

bridezillatobe2009 · February 2012

I don't understand why it's any different than a gift registry? You still wouldn't include the information in your invites and what is so different from people just giving cash? $100 on a gift or $100 cash or $100 towards a honeymoon, what the eff is the difference?

adktd2boots · February 2012

I guess I would just feel bad asking people to pay for an awesome vacation for us, knowing many of those people have never had the money or opportunity to take a vacation themselves.

smartlypretty · February 2012

I personally don't like them, and they aren't very common in my area (ie I don't know anyone IRL that has done one.)

I guess if you were actually getting the exact thing that you chose, then it would be different. Like, if you could set it up through a specific resort and you actually, literally got that snorkle trip or beach side dinner that your relative/friend paid for. But I really don't like how someone could think they are buying you something specific and all you really got was a pile of money at the end.

I also always give cash at weddings. I'd rather a website not take a cut, even if it's just a few percent.

smartlypretty · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_honeymoon-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:5c339162-0f1c-4425-9f03-508a7a45f5cdPost:be91d5c4-b305-4d11-bf90-108a1d240622">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]I guess I would just feel bad asking people to pay for an awesome vacation for us, knowing many of those people have never had the money or opportunity to take a vacation themselves.
Posted by adktd2boots[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree with you. And remember, your guests can *always* offer to pay for things if they want to. Like, they all realize you are going on a honeymoon and can put some cash in an envelope and tell you to go wild. One of FI's aunts (kinda rich) offered to pay for our honeymoon. Completely out of the blue- it was awesome. So yeah, people will offer to pay for things if they want. </div>

smartlypretty · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_honeymoon-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:5c339162-0f1c-4425-9f03-508a7a45f5cdPost:adadaa7b-d85d-43f1-83fb-cf9743785f43">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]A lot of people have differing opinions about honeymoon registries. That said, my FI and I are setting one up because we have a house and all the items we need. I found a credible website that arranges for your guests to essentially choose an item or event on your honeymoon they would like to purchase/sponsor, and then they are responsible for writing a check or giving you cash personally at your wedding. That way there is limited third party involvement. I have talked to several relatives about this idea and they all think it works well for our situation, so I know my guests won't find it overly tacky. Plus, for those that do want to purchase an item and not give money, we have set up an extremely small gift registry. Just wanted to point out that there are feasible, secure options for those who would like to go that route.
Posted by akbrown19[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I think I like this way a lot better. Then your guests know that they didn't actually buy you that snorkle trip- they are just telling you what they would like for you to do with the money.

</div>

mamameech · February 2012

Ours is set up as an option for those who don't want to give just cash; I'd much prefer JUST cash, but this way it's what we get without asking for it.
I'd rather skip gifts completely... I think this is the part I like the least about the wedding planning.

MrsBassPlaya · February 2012

I'm not a fan of the HM registry. I thought about it for a while, but I'm in the mindset that you shouldn't plan a vacation you don't know if you can afford. If they plan this whole thing out and they don't get enough money, then they're kind of in a tough spot.

Plus, you should tell your friend to reserach before booking her HM. Hawaii doesn't have any Sandals resorts and very limited options for AI.

akbrown19 · February 2012

Ours is really cool if anyone wants to check out honeyfund.com... We chose where we are going and made a list of the activities we want to do and guests sign up to pay for an activity or other item. Then it takes the item off the list and allows the guest to pay check/cash via mail or at the wedding. PayPal is an option but there is a 3% fee to use it just like any other transaction on PayPal, so the website literally doesn't get anything. They make their money in a way similar to TK, you can pay for an upgraded website that has customizable features. Anyway, it's still up to you to use the money for what you want, but by giving guests specific things to pay for, they can feel like their money is being used toward creating memories together which is more meaningful than plain old cash for a couple who already has a stable home like us. I mean, we aren't going to ask for grocery money or dog food, which is what we could really use for our kitchen

I don't view it as asking people to pay for something they couldnt afford for themselves, because they are still able to choose something from our list that's in every price range, from $10 to $200. We aren't asking any one person to buy us a dream honeymoon - in fact we are keeping it domestic and affordable.

BMcLeodTeam · February 2012

The big issue a lot of girls (myself included) have with them is exactly what some people see as a 'positive' when setting them up. Its the fact that I could go on and say "Oh, I am going to buy them that ATV tour they are registered for" but you don't get that, you get money in that honeymoon 'pot' paid out to you. Its kind of deceiving. If someone goes on a registry and buys you a towel set, you get a towel set... if they want to give you cash, they give you cash. It just comes across like you are deceiving the guests to get cash in the end.... that's the biggest thing that girls have a hard time with about them on TK.

MSwanny87 · February 2012

We set up a honeymoon registry in addition to a traditional one at one store, so it gives people the option of a more traditional option, and something more modern. I understand that it's essentially like giving the couple money, but some people I've spoken to would prefer knowing their money (and it would!) is going toward a fun excursion, or a dinner on the beach, then just into our bank account. I think it's a great option as a supplement to a traditional registry. As a guest at a wedding, I would love to have the option to buy the couple something for the honeymoon, so I don't see anything wrong with it. I could see more traditional couples, or older relatives thinking it is a tacky option, but at the end of the day it's OUR wedding, and they can just choose not to participate in the honeymoon registry!

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