wake me when it's over...

Re: wake me when it's over...

• Bonnie&Clyde77

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  Sending good vibes your way! I know it's hard being preggers AND planning a wedding, esp when all you want to do is sleep!  Hang in there, it's almost over BTW, have you had morning sickness yet? 

  

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• JayElleJayCee member

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  Thank you for the good vibes. I need them! lol.
  
  and yes!! m/s has been killing me! From week 5 - 6 it was severe nausea. From week 7 - 10 it was severe vomiting (i couldn't keep down ANYTHING). Now i'm into week 11 and I still have vomiting but instead of every time i eat or drink, it's been reduced to half of that. There is still hope for me yet! I thought I would never see the light at the end of the tunnel. While it is a faint one.. it is there! haha.
  
  How is the wedding planning going for you?

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• paprika28

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  jayelle- did you try contacting a beauty school? They'll usually do it pretty cheap for you if you get a student. That way they can practice makeup and hair. I know, it's not the same person, but rather than spend all that money for someone, you might actually be able to get the student to do it on the side for you if they did a killer job.
  
  I hope you and baby jayelle are doing well!

  
  TTC since 12/17/11
  BFP 02/19/2012
  M/C 03/05/2012 *we love you, angel*

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• Ms.BriarRose

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  Trust me honey, it happens to everyone, unfortunately.  My pastor says weddings and funerals bring out the crazies.
  
  My one BM was my best friend for 3 years.  She was over in England for a year getting her masters, and was home for Christmas when I got engaged Dec 2008.  I asked her to be a BM that night, and she said yes.  Since she was away, she helped plan from afar.  When she came home in August 2009, her Bf proposed to her at the Airport.  She then imformed me that she wanted her wedding to be Sept 23- a WEEK before mine.  I tried to put my foot down, but K always was spoiled and got her way.  Luckily, no one had availability on that day, so she set it for August 27th- she HAD to have hers before mine, no matter what.  Then, the day after going out to a really fancy dinner that was really expensive that she wanted to do even though we couldn't really afford it, she informed me that, even though I was THE ONLY ONE state side that really remained in contact with her while she was gone and was her best friend, she was not having me in her wedding (did I mention her BF was a GM in ours as well?).  She told me that 1) I would be too busy focusing on my own wedding to focus on hers, 2) if I got granted my surgery too close to her date that I would be too busy recovering and focusing on my health to give her any attention, 3) that since she would be too busy focusing on her wedding, that she should not be in mine, and 4) though she didn't come out and say it, she didn't want me in her wedding because of my weight- everyone she choose was very skinny, and she made remarks about it.  I ended the friendship.  I flat out told her that I was going t ocompromise my morals for her, which is what I realized I had been doing.  And if were not going to be there to support and encourage me during my health and celebrate the surgery I had been fighting for for so long, then I didn't need you in my life.  K grew up very, very spoiled- mom is a VP at Jefferson in Philly.  Parents paid for college, her $30k car, got her a $50k a year job, everything.  Whatever K wanted, K got- and I don't live my life that way.  Friends don't abuse friends, and that's what she was doing to me the entire relationship, I just didn't see it.  The really sad part?  One of the things I stood firm on was pre-marital counseling, which she and I had talked about and she had said because of the vastly different worlds her and R (her now husband) came from (he came from a townhouse in the city of Philly, first one to granduate college, blue collar and honest working kind of family), that they would be going.  They didn't; when she found out that all the Catholic Church required was a Saturday event, she said that was all they were going to do (one of my grips with the Catholic church- sorry for those who attend, but I think blanket requiring Pre-Cana without evaling every couple hurts rather than helps).  The really sad part is they fight so often about so many things that they will probably end up divorced at the average 7 year mark, with kids involved- and that really makes me sad.
  
  THEN (oh yea, there's more), my cousin was supposed to be in my wedding.  She's 4 months younger than my sister, and my only girl cousin.  We grew up together.  Well, she made some comment on FB (STUPID FB, I hate how it tears families and friends apart!) about leaving for CA in 2010- which really upset me but since I didn't know the whole story, I followed several people's leads and made a joking comment, and then posted saying if that was what God was leading her to do (missionary work), then Godspeed.  The responses I got, from her, friends (who don't know me) and her MOTHER were outrageous.  I was ripped apart, so much so that DH had to step in and make some phone calls.  My cousin and aunt's last reponses were so terrible, I wasn't even allowed to read them.  At that point, based on her language, DH said no way was he having her in our wedding.  Well, it got worse.  In Feb is the Aunnual Shrimp fest in Lewes, and my mom and older sister and I go every year with my aunt.  2010 would have been the first year my sister and cousin could go, so I decided, because it was inexpensive, I knew everyone I wanted there could afford it, and because it was really one of the only events I go to that I truly enjoy (I didn't want to do bars and drinking), that I would make that my bachelorette party.  My MOH/younger sis agreed and thought it was a great idea based on my health, money, etc.  She set up the invite list, and did some pre-planning.  She left in Jan for study abroad in Africa, was didn't come back til mid Feb, so she had set up for friends of mine to send out invites and such (she didn't have any contact with us that entire time).  Well, my mom and I got a very nasty email from my aunt telling me that I was not allowed to have my bparty there, that this was Kasie and Megs year, etc etc.  It was nasty.  DH had to step in (again), and it got really nasty- years of pent up resentment from my aunt towards me came out (why, no one knows- its not like I did anything to her).  She basically told him that I was making all my medical stuff up, that I was a pit of horribleness, that he needed to get out when he could, etc.  Mind you, she is married to my godfather.  She got really upset about us kicking my cousin out, and all the wedding stuff.  DH finally pointed out that she had NOTHING at all to do with the wedding; that her daughter was 21 and an adult and could fight her own battles, and that my aunt needed to stop meddling.  Well, it hasn't gotten better.  They refused to come to the wedding, even though I sent them a message saying I would love to have them come, my dad talked to them- I saw the wedding as a vessel of reconciliation, but she's a very bitter person who wants to be in control of everything.  I finally stood up to her and said, no this is my life, and she didn't like that.  My mom and dad's relationship with them is no more, my sister(s) don't talk to her and told her what she was doing was wrong- the whole family is behind me saying I have done nothing wrong, but weddings tear people and families apart.  Jealousy is a huge issue to contend with.
  
  So, trust me darling, you are not alone at all in any way.  But the wedding will come and go, and you will be able to hold your head high.
  

  Mrs. BLWSquared
  October 2, 2010
  
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• dibsontop member

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  I can't believe you're under a month to go!
  
  You have to try and ignore everyone else.  Let them have their drama.  If they want to ruin their experience of your wedding let them.  But don't let them ruin your experience!

  
  

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• JayElleJayCee member

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  WOW! MBR - that's crazy. and such a shame..I actually remember hearing about your friend awhile back. I didn't know about your cousin though. You know what though, you are better off without them. I completely agree about FB.I have one but I never get on it. It's only family on there and it makes me angry when I have to find everything about my sisters life through FB (she's on everyday) but she can't pick up the phone when I call or call me.
  
  I am starting to see the same thing regarding my BM (she was actually my maid of honor) who has been a part of nothing. She is my friend from high school and I have always done everything for her! When she needed me I would drop everything and drive to Jersey to be there with her. Her daughter is my goddaughter. I just can't believe she's not a part of anything! It blows my mind everyday how she is ignoring my phone calls. It's shocking!! I've never done anything buy be there for her through all of her drama (believe me she has alot of it). It just shows me how selfish she is and I don't need that in my life.
  
  Dibs - You are right. I need to forget about their drama and just focus on the day. Sometimes it's hard but it needs to be done. I can't believe it's less than a month either!!! The time keeps getting closer and closer and I feel like my list is not getting shorter! haha.
  
  Paprika - I would do that, but My FMIL and my 3 FSIL's are all getting their hair and make up done at this place. Since that is half of my bridal party then I am just going to jump on board. The woman is actually closed that day but she is opening up to do our hair and makeup - which is kind of nice since it will be just us. Only 1 of my BM's wont be there. I expressed my dislike of the cost so hopefully the day of, they will help me out. I just can't justify spending that much ya know? I don't mind once - but not twice!

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• RecoveringActor member

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  JLJC, I have a friend like that, too.  We were best friends in high school, and then we totally grew apart.  I actually stopped speaking to her because I was tired of the way she treated me.  And then she called me out of the blue two years ago to ask me if I would cantor her wedding.  I felt guilty, so I said yes.  And it was a lovely ceremony.  But I feel obligated to invite her to my wedding, even though we aren't really friends anymore.  It's not quite the same as her going from MOH to BM to jerkface, but I feel your pain with not knowing where that friendship went. 
  
  **hugs** to you.  I hope it works itself out.

  Paprika: I like it when you burp in my ear. It really turns me on.
  
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• cherbein

  

  November 2010 edited December 2011

  I'm a little over a month away and I can understand the panic.  We still need to order favors, figure out programs, track down people who *still* haven't sent in their response cards, pick music for the reception entrance, etc....
  
  I just keep trying to remind myself that the most important thing is that I am marrying my best friend.  If they send me the wrong flowers, if my cake falls over, even if my flower girl sings Twinkle Twinkle Little Star at the top of her lungs when she makes it down the aisle (happened at my cousin's wedding), none of those things will change the fact that at the end of the day my FI and I will be husband and wife.  Take a deep breathe and don't let the drama queens ruin your day!

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