Exercise addiction - should I say something?

trixie549 · March 2012

There is a woman at my gym who (I think) has an exercise addiction. Every day, she is on the same elliptical machine for HOURS at a time. Once, I was on the machine next to her and looked over to see her time - she had been going for over 2 hours straight! I will often go to the gym for a long period of time (Zumba class, then some weight training, then lunch at the cafe) and see her there working out for the entire duration. She is horribly thin (to the point of being bony and gaunt) and looks like she's going to collapse at any moment.

Part of me feels like I should point her out to the gym staff and maybe they can intervene to get her help if she truly does have a problem. However, I also wonder if I'm just being super judgemental and nosy. If she was running on a treadmill or around the track, I would assume she might be training for a marathon or something, but that doesn't really make sense that she would be marathon training on an elliptical, right?

So, WWYD if you were in my shoes? Say something...or keep your mouth shut?

baystateapple · March 2012

Do you mean "addiction"?

I think it really is her business and you should probably stay out of it. The gym does not want its members making themselves sick (insurance will go after them if they think that they could be responsible); if they think she has a problem they will intervene. I think she'll be pretty pissed if you say something, addiction or no.

trixie549 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:13219e0d-ac03-47e8-b292-9e4b24d21b3e">Re: Exercise addition - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Do you mean "addiction"?
Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>oops - yes. fixed that.

</div>

[Deleted User] · March 2012

Do you mean addiction? I kept reading that as an addition to an exercise program and that didn't make sense.

In any case, mind your own business. You don't even know this woman, right? I'm very bony and would be beyond pissed if someone did that to me.

ahhhitsshannyn · March 2012

Do you mean addiction?

Keep your mouth shut. It's none of your business. If her friends and family feel there is a problem, they will step in.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · March 2012

If you are not acquainted with this woman then it is not your place to say anything. She pays her gym membership just like you do and has every right to be there as often as she wants, for as long as she wants.

There is plenty of problem behavior going on by lots of people in gyms across the world. Leave this to her own friends and family, if there really is a problem.

My workouts vary in length and intensity. I usually will only workout for 45 minutes to an hour, but once in a while I like to go to the gym for 2, 2 and a half hours. I'd be really effin pissed if someone walked up to me and questioned me about my exercise habits.

ahhhitsshannyn · March 2012

Also, she still could be training for a marathon by using the ellipticals. You need to cross train to keep your endurance up. But again, mind your own business and stop being so judgey.

trixie549 · March 2012

Thanks for your opinions. To be clear, IF I were to say something, it would be to the gym staff, not directly to her. But, it seems like the right thing to do it to just keep my mouth shut and mind my own business.

MeaghanandMichael · March 2012

Let me tell you a story I think relates to this. After I had an emergency gall bladder operation, food would go right through me. I had to constantly excuse myself to the bathroom right after eating. This went on for a few months. Two CWs staged an intervention to accuse me (they were nasty) of being bulimic. It was truthfully mortifying to explain to them what I was really doing in there.

Step back and kep your mouth shut. Unless you see the girl physically start to faint, leave her business alone.

KateJ10 · March 2012

I would agree with PP. I am sure it sucks to see her looking like that or exercising that much, but- you can't "save" everyone.

baystateapple · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:f827e2a0-2ee4-4706-bf00-8d229604708c">Re: Exercise addiction - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks for your opinions. To be clear, IF I were to say something, it would be to the gym staff, not directly to her. But, it seems like the right thing to do it to just keep my mouth shut and mind my own business.
Posted by trixie549[/QUOTE]

But again, I don't think they would intervene if they didn't think she had a serious problem. Intervention usually only succeeds (at least initially) in pissing the person off. The gym is not going to want to lose a member, especially if there's really nothing wrong with her. If you go to them, unless they SEE that there really is something wrong with her (or hear about it from her doctor or family member), they aren't going to do anything. They may say "Thanks, we'll make a note of it", but they're not going to intervene.

trixie549 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:adc7f2ab-771a-4f10-8646-1a40a083ce76">Re: Exercise addiction - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Let me tell you a story I think relates to this. After I had an emergency gall bladder operation, food would go right through me. I had to constantly excuse myself to the bathroom right after eating. This went on for a few months. Two CWs staged an intervention to accuse me (they were nasty) of being bulimic. It was truthfully mortifying to explain to them what I was really doing in there. Step back and kep your mouth shut. Unless you see the girl physically start to faint, leave her business alone.
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

<div>Yikes! That's pretty awful that they accused you of being bulimic.</div><div>
</div><div>All the more reason to keep my nose out of other people's business, I guess.</div>

AllAboutTheBenjamin · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:f827e2a0-2ee4-4706-bf00-8d229604708c">Re: Exercise addiction - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks for your opinions. To be clear, IF I were to say something, it would be to the gym staff, not directly to her. But, it seems like the right thing to do it to just keep my mouth shut and mind my own business.
Posted by trixie549[/QUOTE]

If there really is a problem then I am sure gym staff notices. If there is some type of protocol for them to follow on stuff like that, I would put my faith in their professionalism.

And what shan says about cross training for marathons is true, as well. I'm running a 10k in a couple months - which obviously isn't as much as a marathon - and yeah, doing other types of exercise at longer lengths of time definitely helps, big time.

ahhhitsshannyn · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:bbd82cf9-e7b5-45e6-a037-9d82c3d87dc7">Re: Exercise addiction - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think I'd ever approach a stranger about something like that. I don't know the person, so I really wouldn't know if it was atypical behavior or if their health had deteriorated. I do get that you see her on the elliptical every day but you don't really know how hard she's pushing herself. Also your version 'bone thin' may be a little bit subjective. <strong> I also see it as would you approach a stranger you deem overweight for buying unhealthy food or for sitting around</strong>?
Posted by kodakitty[/QUOTE]

Exactly, or tell the cashier not to sell them that ice cream since it's fattening. You cannot control what strangers do. Just live your own life and forget about it.

ricksang · March 2012

It's really not your concern and if she does have an exercise addiction, it's a form of an eating disorder and you'll only embarrass her and she will only find some place else to work out. .

angelstar975 · March 2012

My FI was a certified trainer and at the gym he worked at, he was required to keep an eye out for people like that. If someone seemed to have some sort of eating disorder or exercise addiction, he had to approach them, offer them help and they weren't allowed back at the gym until they got help. I actually think you should say something to the staff. Not just someone who works on the floor, but someone a little higher up. If they feel it's a concern, they'll address it. If it's not, they won't and the woman will be none the wiser.

mehgank · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_exercise-addition-should-i-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:92e3b448-d93a-4124-b10b-04a83a7cde9ePost:3918c7a7-7bdf-45e3-a515-121e94ae085f">Re: Exercise addiction - should I say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]My FI was a certified trainer and at the gym he worked at, he was required to keep an eye out for people like that. If someone seemed to have some sort of eating disorder or exercise addiction, he had to approach them, offer them help and they weren't allowed back at the gym until they got help.<strong> I actually think you should say something to the staff</strong>. Not just someone who works on the floor, but someone a little higher up. If they feel it's a concern, they'll address it. If it's not, they won't and the woman will be none the wiser.
Posted by angelstar975[/QUOTE]

That's their job, not the OP's. I don't go to Applebee's and start waiting tables, therefore, I wouldn't go to the gym and start addressing the way/reasons other people work out.

sherrbearr22 · March 2012

PPs are right. I was once kicked out of a gym by the manager for training too much, too long, too hard. If some stranger would have said something to me I would have punched them in the face and then gone home and cried. But I was a WEE bit obsessed in those days!

angelstar975 · March 2012

In Response to Re:Exercise addiction should I say something?:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Exercise addiction should I say something?:My FI was a certified trainer and at the gym he worked at, he was required to keep an eye out for people like that. If someone seemed to have some sort of eating disorder or exercise addiction, he had to approach them, offer them help and they weren't allowed back at the gym until they got help. I actually think you should say something to the staff. Not just someone who works on the floor, but someone a little higher up. If they feel it's a concern, they'll address it. If it's not, they won't and the woman will be none the wiser.Posted by angelstar975That's their job, not the OP's. I don't go to Applebee's and start waiting tables, therefore, I wouldn't go to the gym and start addressing the way/reasons other people work out. Posted by mehgank[/QUOTE]

You're right, it isn't her job, but if she has a concern, there's no reason she can't voice it. If they don't see a reason for her concern, they won't do anything about it. If they've already noticed this woman and haven't felt the need to do anything, then they'll probably thank the OP for reporting it and continue to do nothing. I don't think it could hurt anything... If this woman passes out on the treadmill, OP will probably wish she had said something. That's my opinion and clearly I'm the only one who feels that way, which is fine.

angelsong21 · March 2012

I don't think it will hurt to inform the gym staff, but it's unlikely they are going to do anything about it. To me that's like telling a waitress you think someone a few seats down is an alcoholic and she should do something. Random people don't just intervene in addiction situations. It's a touchy subject, and as PP pointed out, there are definitely healthy people that may look "too skinny" to others but really just have a great metabolism. My best friend when I was younger had several teachers over the years approach her alone and accuse her of having an eating disorder. She did not.

When I was in my eating disorder, I worked out at Lifetime for hours a day. And I looked sick. No one ever said a work to me, and if they had, I probably was in a state in which I would have ripped their face off.

Exercise addiction - should I say something?

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