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Nuptial Mass without Communion?

stantokmstantokm member
100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
in Catholic Weddings
My FH and I are planning on having our wedding ceremony WITHOUT a full Mass because he isn't Catholic and because out of approximately 200 people, only about 30-40 will be Catholic and able to receive Communion.  We didn't want to start off the unification of our families by letting everyone watch my family and I receive as they just sit there.

Now I'm wondering if it's even possible to have Mass without Communion.  I would kind of think not because isn't that the whole point of the Mass?

This is more for curiosity's sake than anything else.  A Deacon is marrying us, so he can't perform a Mass anyway.
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Re: Nuptial Mass without Communion?

  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    mass isnt mass withouth communion.
    you can just have the catohlic ceremony, its still valid.
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  • stantokmstantokm member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited December 2012
    Calypso, no worries about our ceremony being valid.  I already knew that, but found out that my parents DIDN'T when they asked a seminarian student (in front of me, at my cousin's baby's Baptism party) what he thought about us not having a Mass with the ceremony.  The seminarian assured them that it was still a sacrament and a real Catholic wedding. :)
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  • bibliophile2010bibliophile2010 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    My understanding is that the Eucharist must be offered to all the faithful present any time a mass is celebrated, so you cannot have a ceremony that includes the Liturgy of the Eucharist and thus, the Sacrifice of the Mass, but not have "communion" for the congregation. So it is either mass or ceremony without mass, both of which are equally valid (like PPs have said).
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  • Riss91Riss91 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Hello and welcome!

    The ladies have given you awesome advice already. I just want to encourage you to have mass/communion if YOU want to. There are many more blessings that come along with having mass and you shouldn't have to give that up for your guests. I've been to plenty of ceremonies in different faiths and never felt "snubbed" by the bride and groom for having the ceremony that speaks to them, even if it meant I couldn't participate in everything.

    Your guests will likely not care, and if some do - they will get over it pretty quickly. Just some food for thought!

    Eighter way - congratulations and stick around the board - we love new faces/voices/experiences!

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  • stantokmstantokm member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Riss (and everyone else), thanks!  Really the deciding factor in not having the Mass is that my FH isn't Catholic nor intends on converting (though he comes to Mass every Sunday and Holy Day with me and agrees on raising our children as Catholics).  If we were both Catholic, I'd have the Mass despite most of the guests not being the same religion, but as things stand now I know he'd be upset if he wasn't able to participate in such an important part of his own ceremony.

    I'd love if he converted one day and we could have an anniversary Mass with just our family, but I'll still be happy even if that never happens because he's the best man I've ever known. :)
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    OP, just keep praying for him and his conversion.  you never know what might happen.

    my sister married a non-catholic and he converted about 4 or 5 years into their marriage, once discussions began about my nephews first communion.

    converts are often the strongest catholics!
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  • stantokmstantokm member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Calypso, my dad's side of the family is Catholic and he and his three siblings all married people who weren't Catholic or weren't practicing Catholics and now all four are practicing and are Super Catholics.  I pray that he convert if it's God's will (I hope that it is, but I won't be disappointed if it's not).  It makes me a little sad on Sundays when I go up for Communion and he doesn't.
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  • maggieandreymaggieandrey member
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    I'm not catholic, but we are still having a full mass. I was initially reluctant to do full mass because I won't be receiving communion and thought that would be awkward, but somebody explained to me the importance of receiving both the sacraments. Well obviously I won't, but my fiance will, and that's still important to me. Like your fiance, I have no intention of converting but still go to mass regularly. So if it's important to you, I think it's worth a conversation. I'm not upset at all that I can't participate in that part - it's my personal choice.
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  • hoff9631hoff9631 member
    First Comment
    You have to be careful with this one. Other forms of Christianity can accept communion but it's frowned upon if they do it in the Catholic church. For example, Lutherans and Baptists take communion in their own churches, but are not supposed to take it when entering other churches. My deacon made it very clear that if a portion of our guests were not Catholic he would prefer us not to do communion in our mass because even the non-Catholics may get up and accept communion, which is a no-no to do in other churches. Not everyone knows this though so he said a lot of people may end up getting up and receiving it by mistake. He would rather us skip the communion and still have a full valid mass than give communion to those who aren't supposed to be getting it. 
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  • jleon12lsujleon12lsu member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its First Anniversary
    My priest actually discourages having Communion if the bride and groom are of different faiths.  He says we want to celebrate the unification of 2 people, not the differences.  
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