What Advice Would You Give to Give to Brides?

Re: What Advice Would You Give to Give to Brides?

• unchatenfrance

  

  October 2012 edited October 2012

  Give them room to choose their own dresses (you can select the colour or mandate a length), their own accessories, hair, and makeup. And don't expect them to "support you" in planning your wedding because that's what your fiance is for. And stop calling them your "maids." As long as a bride isn't a bridezilla from hell, being a "maid" should not be "hard work."

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• missfrodo member

  

  October 2012

  I'm not sure why their lives are so difficult to begin with?  

  Basic advice you'll find here is to ask them each, privately, for a dress budget and find a dress within the lowest price point.  Anything else that you dictate (ie, specific hair/shoes, etc), you pay for yourself.  It also helps when brides aren't total douchcanoes and try to pull stuff like dying their BM's hair or forcing a BM to add/remove a tattoo (yes, it's happened--check out some of the older posts).  Oh, or kicking someone out b/c she's pregnant.  That's another good one. 

  
  

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• theelusive1

  

  October 2012

  Don't tell anyone your wedding plans, colors, guest list etc.  Make it all a secret and it will go so much better.  Do not expect anyone to do anything for you unless you hire and are paying them. Don't hire friends.

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• unchatenfrance

  

  October 2012 edited October 2012

  Also, don't fire a bridesmaid if she "doesn't seem interested enough in your wedding" or won't rearrange her life so she can attend bi-weekly meetings do go over the minutae of your wedding.

  
  

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• calliopeia2013 member

  

  October 2012

  Ask people to be your bridesmaids because you can't imagine getting married without them.  If the consideration "What can this bridesmaid do for me?" even crosses your mind, you're doing it wrong.  (Ditto for "Who will throw me the best parties?" or any other similar concern.)

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• mcda04 member

  

  October 2012

  Don't treat your friends like props or slaves and don't expect ANYTHING from them other than to purchase a dress and show up at your wedding. They are not responsible for throwing parties, or additional expenses. Oh and don't bombard them with wedding talk. Even if they're your BFF's, they just won't be as excited as you are until maybe a few months / weeks before the wedding.

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• pink34562000 member

  

  October 2012

  Your bridesmaids' only obligation is to buy dresses (within their budgets) and show up for the wedding. Make sure you privately ask each bridesmaid their budgets. Or, have them pick out  dresses that are a particular color, style, etc. This way, your bridesmaids can find affordable dresses that look great on them.
  
  Your bridesmaids are not wedding planners, coordinators, DIY experts, etc. Don't demand help or setup mandatory meetings with your bridesmaids. All wedding planning, coordinating and DIY projects should be done by you and your FI or paid professionals.
  
  My final advice is don't have an invited guest work your wedding. It's rude and unfair for any invited guest to work an event. It also puts them in an awkward position.

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• Peledreamsofrain member

  

  October 2012

  My advice? Don't make it hard work to be yourbridesmaid. Seriously, it's not supposed to be indentured servitude. My wedding was my business, my responsibility, and my work of love to accomplish with my FI.

  Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten
  
  
  
  
  
  

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