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Time between Ceremony and Reception

lindka02lindka02 member
First Comment
in Ohio-Cincinnati
I have a dilema on the time between the ceremony and the reception.  The only times we can have our ceremony is at 1:30 pm or 6:30 pm.  It is a Catholic church and due to mass, these are the options.  I would prefer to not have it at 6:30 because I feel that is too late since we have a lot of kids between our two families and I'm afraid it will be too late for them.  If we do the 1:30pm ceremony and start the recption at 5, doors open at 4:30 for cocktails and apps, is this too long of a wait between the two.  We are not doing a full mass and pictures will be before with some after.  We are on the west side so there aren't a lot of options for activities and it will be January.  Anyone else in this situation? What would you do?
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Re: Time between Ceremony and Reception

  • GoBucksOHGoBucksOH member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    If you did a 1:30 ceremony, why would you wait until 5pm for the reception to start? Is that the earliest your venue will allow it to begin?
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  • lindka02lindka02 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No, we can start earlier than 5pm but we are doing a dinner buffet so I didn't want to start too early. 
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  • Michele45419Michele45419 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I attended a wedding once where the wedding was at 1:30 and the reception didn't start until 5:00.  A group of the guests decided we would just hit up a local bar and relax until it was time for the reception.  Sometimes it happens and we didn't really mind.  It was a good chance for us (as guests) to mingle with our common friends and catch-up.  If you decide to have your reception and wedding with hours between, maybe have some suggestions of places to go hang-out, etc? 
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  • GoBucksOHGoBucksOH member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I personally do not like the time gap in between the wedding and reception. You are kind of leaving your guests hanging for those few hours in between. Michele had a good suggestion with finding a local bar to hang out at, but that will only work for a portion of your guests. I know in my family, aunt Margaret and Grandma Sue will not want to hang at a bar for 3+ hours waiting for your party to start. Not to mention, you are expecting them to find their own entertainment and spend their own $$ to do so.

    You know your guests better than anyone, but I personally think its very inconvenient to have such a large time gap in between the ceremony and reception.
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  • julialynnjonesjulialynnjones
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    We have the exact same problem... so here's a few options we're considering:

    (1) Lengthen the ceremony -- />  We're having a full mass, some form of recieving line, and will probably pass out rice/rose petals/bubbles for people to throw as we exit the church to our limo.

    (2) We picked a reception hall that is a 25-minute drive from the church in order to take up some of the "down time" between the ceremony and reception.

    (3) We picked a hotel for our guests that is between the reception hall and church so that out-of-town guests can check-in to their rooms between the ceremony and reception.

    (4) Our reception hall (Aston Oaks) has a public sports bar on the upper level of their clubhouse that is separate from the reception hall.  So we're planning to encourage our in-town guests to hang out there if they need something to do.

    (5) We're also looking into extending the reception by starting cocktail hour at 4 p.m. and then serve dinner at  5 p.m. -- it'll really depend on our budget.

    It's a tough timing situation, but your guests will find a way to deal with it.
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  • TeamBabyTeamBaby
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Ah yes, the "Catholic gap."  :)  It's pretty common, especially in the midwest for some reason.  We were also in the same boat.  I "polled" our families during my initial planning and I was surprised that most weren't even phased by the gap (like I said, for many Catholics, this is common).  They also weren't phased by the late reception time either.  We eventually decided to go with the later ceremony time.  Ours starts at 6pm and we're doing full mass with some other cultural traditions (FI is Filipino), so we're looking at about 1h15m ceremony.  Since you're not doing a full mass, it's really not that late.  I say go for the later time.  GL! :)
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  • ebbowman5ebbowman5
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I don't like the large gap between ceremony/reception if at all possible. Our wedding is at 3:30 and shouldn't last past 4:15 (at the VERY latest) and then our invitations said that the reception starts at 5pm. That way we have a little time to take a few pictures (we are doing the majority ahead of time) and it gives the guests time to drive a few miles, park, find the reception hall, etc… and then we arrive. I like things to move quickly :)
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  • Mieka&JonMieka&Jon
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Long gaps between the ceremony and reception are very common at Catholic weddings. With that being said, I think you should consider how many of your guests are local before making the decision to have a long gap. If people have the option to go home in between, then it's really not a big deal. But, if you're going to have several out-of-town guests, then a big gap can be an inconvenience. I've been in this situation as a guest several times and have always found myself either bored in a hotel room or rushing to get to the reception on time because I've gone sight-seeing or shopping during the gap.
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  • lindka02lindka02 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks everyone!  That really helps.  I was starting to really stress over the gap thing and couldn't logistically get it together.  I like the idea of giving out of town guests a chance to check into the hotel and I think I will look at legthening the ceremony but we have to be out by 3 because of confession.  A lot of our friends and family are Catholic so I'm sure they've experienced this previously.  I am also trying to figure out how to lengthen our reception and start it earlier.  It's a five hour reception but I really don't want people to leave at 9.  But I guess it's making it a long day for them.  Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it.
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  • nics21nics21 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would personally do the 630.  I have been to many catholic weddings that started at 7 and had lots of children and it worked out well.  It sounds perfect for a reception from 8-12 or 730-1130.  I am having a Catholic wedding at 630, although I am not inviting children so its a little different.

    Even if there are a lot of kids there, weddings are special exceptions to allow them to stay up late.   I think you will have a better turnout for the ceremony/reception if you do it at 630, and that would be my personal preference if I were attending a wedding.

    That being said, I think you should just go with your gut and people who want to come and support you will and they won't gripe about it :)
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  • tasharockstasharocks
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    i'm not a fan of gaps. i think 6:30 will be fine. i see young kids up rather late all the time--at the mall, dave and buster's, newport, etc.
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  • newsgrl39newsgrl39 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    go for the 6:30 time slot! I don't think thats late at all for a wedding.. actually I would consider it extremely common for the weddings that I have been to in the past...and i have been to a ton... 
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  • lindka02lindka02 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The other big problem with the 6:30 is that we can't get into the church much before that because of 5:00 mass.  It would mean not being able to get any pictures done before the wedding unless we went off site.  With it being January, I'm not sure there are many options for outdoor pictures.  Taking pictures afterwards means 1 hr or so for pictures then 20 minutes to the reception.  I think we are just going to start appetizers at 4 and dinner at 5ish.  It's a five hour reception and if we needed to we can add time.  We may even plan something for afterward if people still want to go out.  Thanks for all the help!
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  • andrea4111andrea4111 member
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am in the same situation also. Most of my family is Catholic and it seems to be the norm in most of the Catholic weddings I have been to that there is a significant gap. I too have found it nice to just be able to hang out with my friends who have come in from out of town at a bar before going to the reception. It has never seemed like a big deal to me but I was raised Catholic so maybe that's why. We tried to start our ceremony later and when that didn't work I did ask around what people thought and no one thought it was a big deal to have the gap. We are providing transportation to the reception from the hotel so the guest who want this option will have to return to the hotel anyway. Our hotel also has a bar/restuarant in it so hopefully people won't mind too much. We are providing a list of nearby activities/shopping in our welcome bags for our out of town guest also. HTH!
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  • groenekrgroenekr member
    Eighth Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am having the same problem myself. Are you getting married at St. Al's by chance?
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