BM Gift Ideas

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

I was wondering if I could get some feed back on my idea for my BM gifts.

I was at shoppers yesterday they had QUO makeup pallets on sale from 36 down to 10 dollars. Which got me thinking. I'm not bringing in a make-up artist for the wedding and I was thinking maybe it would be nice to buy the girls some nice make-up that they can use for the wedding. I'm thinking eye shadows and stuff like that.

I googled some things and found:
http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/Prod...ID=jIxqOra

http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/Prod...ID=jIxqOst

http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/Prod...D=jIxqOsP.

Originally I was thinking:
Clutches (Were using these in place of bouquets so I'm buying them)
Earrings
and a GC for a Mani/Pedi for the night before the wedding.

Well the earrings came in last night and they look...... Cheap. I didn't pay alot for them, and I had ordered some for myself this summer and I love them, wear them all the time. Well I thought I was getting the same ones when I ordered them for the girls, and they are not the same and they look cheap. I might still give them to them but I dont want it to be a main part of the gift. so now I'm thinking

Clutches
MakeUp Kit
Nailpolish

Would you be happy recieving this a BM gift? I have set a spending limit of $80 each for Attendants Gifts.

artbyallie · November 2012

Things to use/wear for the wedding are not gifts because they're props to contribute to your wedding. Please pick things that they will enjoy. They don't have to match as long as you spend roughly the same amount per girl.

To answer your question, no, I would not be happy with that gift. I never carry a clutch in my normal life; I hardly ever wear make-up beyond concealer, powder, and mascara, and I'm very picky about what I do wear; and I have every nail polish color imaginable already.

Shop for them as if for their birthday or Christmas. Are these really things you would give them as a gift under normal circumstances?

JaxInBlue · November 2012

Completely agree with allie. Anything for thr wedding is not a gift. It is part of their wedding attire. And make up is something very personal - I only wear specific shades and brands and would not want to get just anything. I'd return the earrings if you can, forgo the make up (let them use their own) and really think about the clutches. I

f your friends use clutches, I'd make sure the rest of the gift is personal to each girl based on her tastes and interests - so maybe a spa GC for one, a bookstore GC for the reader, a Starbucks GC for the friend who loves a morning coffee, etc. (It doesn't need to be gift cards; I did purses filled with other items for each bridesmaids - but the items and purse matched their tastes.)

Definitely shop like it is their birthday gift!

KatWAG · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:7fedde09-b50d-43b5-8c79-e80133421d59Post:8abd781f-a08a-4fd2-b161-ceb6740567c1">Re: BM Gift Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]Things to use/wear for the wedding are not gifts because they're props to contribute to your wedding. Please pick things that they will enjoy. They don't have to match as long as you spend roughly the same amount per girl. <strong>To answer your question, no, I would not be happy with that gift. I never carry a clutch in my normal life; I hardly ever wear make-up beyond concealer, powder, and mascara, and I'm very picky about what I do wear; and I have every nail polish color imaginable already</strong>. Shop for them as if for their birthday or Christmas. Are these really things you would give them as a gift under normal circumstances?
Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]

Ditto to all of this. I only wear a few specific brand of make up that I think looks good on my skin. I think this lacks creativity.

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

Interesting. I'm actually Shocked so many people feel this way. I have never heard this "rule". Where i'm from the gift is almost always something that can be used for the wedding, althought my not be "required".

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

I really don't think buying them make-up is as selfish as your making it seem. All my girls like makeup, wear make up and I'm pretty sure would be happy to recieve a nice pallet of good quality stuff. But thats just my opinion.

I get what youre saying, and I'm not arguing. I just find it interesting becuase I've never heard of this before.

And yes, they are buying a dress (we did pick one that they all agreed they could wear again. I gave them full reigns on this decision), and sure they are taking time out of their lives to be a part of the wedding. But you make is sound like a terrible punishment. No one was held at gun point to be a bridesmaid. There was no pressure on any of them to be a part of the day.

I'm fairly certain they are all very excited about the wedding and know whats associated.

Getting a gift of thanks is a bonus. I'm pretty sure no one has ever agreed to be a bridemaid becuase of the awesome swag they were expecting to get in return. But Hey, maybe I'm completely naive in thinking not everyone is stuck up and looking for what they get out of it.

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7fedde09-b50d-43b5-8c79-e80133421d59Post:8a5304b5-3ea7-49c2-940b-e5cd437edc72">Re: BM Gift Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]Your original post stated that you weren't bringing in a pro to do their makeup, and thought they could use the makeup for the wedding. It's therefore to be used in the wedding. Makeup is also very personal.....most women would prefer to select their own. What if they have skin allergies? They might not be able to use what you bought them. <div>Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]</div><div>
</div><div>I get what your saying, however, they don't HAVE to wear it on the wedding day if they choose not to. I'm not one of those dictating brides that instruct their BM's to lose 10 lbs, get a tan, grow their hair, wear it a certain way. They are all beautiful girls regardless. Do they HAVE to wear the makeup on the wedding. Heck No. </div><div>And i do know my girls - none of them have make-up allergies, or sensitive skin. So thats not an issue.</div><div>
</div><div>I get the girls are being a part of the wedding as a tribute to me, and i get that its an expense. </div><div>
</div><div>Anyway, I get it loud and clear. Some people like this idea (other boards) some people don't.</div><div>
</div>

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7fedde09-b50d-43b5-8c79-e80133421d59Post:9b4673c9-7585-4d5c-a527-acac15fab042">Re: BM Gift Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]If the person likes makeup, then it is a fine gift. I gave two of my BMs makeup. One as part of something else, and the other a large set. I included a gift receipt just in case.
Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]

<div>Oh good call with a gift receipt just incase! :)</div>

artbyallie · November 2012

A gift receipt is a good idea. My main point was to not shop for wedding-related things. The make-up palette is not necessarily wedding-related, and of course you know your friends better than we do. If they wear and like that brand and would enjoy getting it as a birthday/Christmas gift, go for it. A mani/pedi for the wedding and a clutch for the wedding is for your pictures and wouldn't be considered a gift for them.

Kate61487 · November 2012

ditto PPs - there's not actually anything wrong with your gift ideas; any / all of those could be a lovely gift; it's just the context.

I gave my girls Coach wristlets so clearly I don't think a purse is a bad gift. The difference is I picked bags I thought they'd specifically like (and wouldn't splurge on themselves for) and didn't consider at all how it would look with the dress. I also didn't expect them to use it on the day of at all - though I think two did... I dunno, they didn't walk down the aisle with them... Brides almost always buy bouquets for their girls; we don't consider it a gift to them though. I consider this clutch equivalent to a bouquet.

A mani/pedi gift certificate is a gift I would LOVE (given it's to a salon I live near and could go to). Being told it is to be used for the wedding dampers that and makes it about your day instead of about pampering them (and since you give gifts at the rehearsal dinner usually I'd already have my nails done).

The make-up I wouldn't be into because I don't wear make-up (literally just eyeliner and nothing else). But clearly other girls would like it. As long as that specific girl would like it, uses that brand, likes the colors, etc. it's a lovely gift.

Peledreamsofrain · November 2012

It's not a matter of preference or rules, its just plain logic. Anything you buy to benefit or please yourself is not a gift. It's a selfcentered maneuver that is usually not appreciated by the recipient. It is the same as a hisband who buys his wife a mop for Christmas. Not something she wanted, not something she likes, NOT a gift. But it sure benefits him. And I guess if he's a jerk he'll pat himself on the back about his generosity." Well it was an EXPENSIVE mop!

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

I was forgoing the mani/pedi for the makeup idea.

I was thinking instead of doing the mani/pedi, i'd get the girls makeup pallets that suit their tastes. More Neutrals for some, more fashion colours for others.

I understand what everyone is saying about not buying gifts that are "for the wedding." and I got it.

Before today, I just never really thought of it as bad etiquette.

ftrmrsweatherdon · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7fedde09-b50d-43b5-8c79-e80133421d59Post:3132d753-37f6-4da1-96d9-1e873735105c">Re:BM Gift Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]Look, you asked if it was a good gift, you were told it was not. You can justify why your girls shouldn't expect gifts and how every BM gift you've gotten was for the wedding, but bottom line is would you buy these exact items in these exact colors for each of these girls for Christmas or their birthday? If so, then it will be a good gift. If not, then find something you WOULD normally get them as a gift and go with that.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]
<div>Yup. I got it.</div>

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