Oh no, what to do?

Hallanole · May 2012

I just got my frist response in with an "And Guest" written on it.
This is my friend and she is a single mom. She does not have a man. She actually just met someone last weekend and is chatting with him. When I sent out the invited in the begining of the month she was Single and I have budget limits. I also wrote just her name on the invite.

Here is the issue. My venue I paid for 125 guest as it's all inclusive and this was what FI and I could pay for. Mom and Nana wanted additional people, like 10 family friends I had to cut from my list. They said they would pay that portion. So I said fine.

Now, I can allow her the and guest, pending that I don't go over my limit. So far I've only had 1 couple RSVP no. (Mom was insisting 10% will say no)

The thing is if I go under 125 people, I am still paying for 125 people. I only invited 125 people. Mom and nana tagged on 10. So I'm at 135 invited and 2 no with 40 yes' in to date.

What would you do?

rachael7183 · May 2012

You are going to be surprised about how many people do this. I invited alot of my FI's friends w/o guest because they are not dating anyone - - well did not matter - - they still RSVP-ed with guest. Dont worry too much because for the few people that do this, you will have people RSVP no and it will work itself out.

colleenm18 · May 2012

I am a little confused.

So you invited 135 but are hoping only 125 show? If that is the case call your friend let her know that for now the invitation is only extended to her but if you do end up receiving enough No's she is more then welcome to bring her guest and you will let her know. I am sure it is considered "rude" to let her bring the date after the fact but I think that just seems the easiest way to go about this.

ski2play · May 2012

Will your vendor allow you to up the count if necessary? If I am reading the above correctly you are comfortable with you and your FI hosting 125 guest, and your Mom and Nana have agreed to pay for 10 more. If that is the case, I would hold out a little bit and see if the relationship that the single mom has started continues. And if it does, let her bring him, if it doesn't, no harm no foul and you didn't have to speak to her at all to tell her he is not welcome.

Hallanole · May 2012

No, Colleen, I'm hoping no less then 125 will show. My venue is an all inclusive priced at 125. If less then 125 show, I am still paying for 125 which is already paid for. For $100/pp I am getting ....

Wedding on site, Hall Rental for 5 Hours, Exclusive use of the grounds, Fully Trained Waitstaff, Full Course Sit Down Family Style Meal (4 Course), Wedding Consultant, Beverage fountain with signature drink, Limousine, Wedding Cake, wine, Cold Appitizers, Centerpieces, Florist, Photographer and DJ

Mom and Nana are paying for the 10 additional she wanted. Pending I get over 125 to attend. I couldn't afford those additional 10 people on my budget.

I can do up to 400 people if I want. The venue holds up to 400.

I am not sure if she is planning an adult date or one of her sons. I also have no kids except mine that are in the wedding and my neice whom is FG.

I could technically allow her the adult guest as long as I stay between the 125-135 limit. I already have one couple RSVP no. So I'm able to allow. But if she brings her son, there is a potenial uproar especially from my youngest sister who is ticked off I said no kids.

On a side note, I'm hoping my youngest sister says no. She is drama. She has no problem being mouthy, starting fist fights and commontions. Dad has already said if she comes, and starts up, he will escort her out.

michelle11988 · May 2012

So I would call her and get a read on who her "and guest" is. How many other single friends did you not give plus one's to? If there are a lot, be careful if you allow her a plus one so you don't get word out that your friend got a plus one and noone else can. I think your best bet is to call and say no, unless she is really in a relationship now and you feel like inviting her new man since you have the 2 declines you would still be in budget.

Hallanole · May 2012

Only 3 other guests where not given plus ones as they are utterly single and have not had dates in a few years. They are in a circle of friends so they will have a bunch of people they know. And they already responded as singles.

toomanychoices17 · May 2012

I agree with what PPs said. But I also think you'll have more than 10% say no, so even though it was rude of her to assume she could bring someone, you should wait it out to see your numbers before you call her.

Oh no, what to do?

Re: Oh no, what to do?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards