Pre-wedding Parties

MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party

My sister/MOH has refused to plan my bachelorette party and I'm upset.  Here's why:

1. She has a baby and says she is too busy
2. I want to go to San Fransisco/Napa for a wine tasting weekend and she says it's too expensive but I live in Denver and she lives in Oakland, CA. 
3. I don't even want anyone to pay for me!  My other maids who live in CO and Mass. all love the idea!
4. She thinks it's rude of me to ask my friends to go to San Fransisco even though they say they love the idea.  She refuses to plan it for me because she thinks it's unethical
5.  She thinks it's disgusting that I am asking my maids to pay for their dresses
6.  She hasn't done anything to help me at all and everytime I ask her to do somethng she flips out
7. When I'll see her over the holidays I asked if she wanted to go try on her MOH dress while I'm there and she can't commit because it depends on her 9 mo. old's mood.  Can't her hubby watch the baby?

What should I do?

Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party

  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:95b2f7f7-36d8-4a00-8e0b-aa21649a381b">MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister/MOH has refused to plan my bachelorette party and I'm upset.  Here's why: 1. She has a baby and says she is too busy 2. I want to go to San Fransisco/Napa for a wine tasting weekend and she says it's too expensive but I live in Denver and she lives in Oakland, CA.  3. I don't even want anyone to pay for me!  My other maids who live in CO and Mass. all love the idea! 4. She thinks it's rude of me to ask my friends to go to San Fransisco even though they say they love the idea.  She refuses to plan it for me because she thinks it's unethical 5.  She thinks it's disgusting that I am asking my maids to pay for their dresses 6.  She hasn't done anything to help me at all and everytime I ask her to do somethng she flips out 7. When I'll see her over the holidays I asked if she wanted to go try on her MOH dress while I'm there and she can't commit because it depends on her 9 mo. old's mood.  Can't her hubby watch the baby? <strong>What should I do?</strong>
    Posted by ktworkman[/QUOTE]

    You need to chill out before you permantly destroy your relationship with your sister.  The MOH is not obligated to plan a bachelorette party.  Any party thrown in your honor is a gift that you should be grateful for if you receive one.  It is not something to which you are entitled. 

    Your sister is perfectly within her rights to decline to throw you a bachelorette party.  It is incredibly rude for you to demand that she do so.  Guess what?  She has a kid, so you aren't always her number one priorty.  I think it is asking a lot of your sister and friends to go away for a bachelorette party weekend in Napa.  Napa isn't cheap at all. 

    Also, just as your sister doesn't have to throw you a bachelorette party, she also doesn't have to help plan your wedding.  You are the one getting married so you and your FI are responsible for planning your own wedding or hiring a wedding planner. 
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:95b2f7f7-36d8-4a00-8e0b-aa21649a381b">MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister/MOH has refused to plan my bachelorette party and I'm upset.  Here's why: 1. She has a baby and says she is too busy<strong> Do you have a baby?  I had 3 kids.  She IS busy.</strong> <strong>Give her a break.</strong>

     2. I want to go to San Fransisco/Napa for a wine tasting weekend and she says it's too expensive but I live in Denver and she lives in Oakland, CA.   <strong>You can give suggestions for where you'd  like a b-party, but it's not your decision.  It's the decision of the people who OFFER (because throwing you a b-party is NOT a requirement) to decide the particulars based on what THEY can afford.</strong>

     3. I don't even want anyone to pay for me!  My other maids who live in CO and Mass. all love the idea! <strong>All too often people will say they love a bride's idea, because they don't want to hurt her feelings.  But on their own, they're saying something altogether different.   I personally think that a "destination b-party is a lot to ask of people who are already buying attire for your wedding, traveling to your wedding, perhaps taking vacation time for your wedding, buying a gift for your wedding, and perhaps even throwing you a shower.
    </strong>
    4. She thinks it's rude of me to ask my friends to go to San Fransisco even though they say they love the idea.  She refuses to plan it for me because she thinks it's unethical  <strong>She's partly right.  It's not "unethical" for her to pretend to host a party that you're insisting on, but it is very poor etiquette and it's rude. As for the first sentence about being rude to ask your friends to travel for a b-party, please see #3.</strong>

    5.  She thinks it's disgusting that I am asking my maids to pay for their dresses  <strong>That depends, for me, on whether you cleared a budget with them first or not.  If you didn't get their input on what they can afford for attire, but simply dictated that they buy the dress YOU decided on, then I agree with your sister.  If you did get input and kept the dress choice within the lowest budget request, then I disagree with your sister.</strong>

    6.  She hasn't done anything to help me at all and everytime I ask her to do somethng she flips out <strong> She doesn't have to do anything to help you, and you're wrong for asking.  It's your wedding:  You and your FI plan and execute it.  Your WP are not your Wedding Planners, they're your Wedding Party. 
    </strong>
    7. When I'll see her over the holidays I asked if she wanted to go try on her MOH dress while I'm there and she can't commit because it depends on her 9 mo. old's mood.  Can't her hubby watch the baby? <strong>Apparently not.</strong> <strong>9 month olds are infants.  If she's still breast feeding, then no, she can't predict when he'll want to feed, and her hubby can't feed him.</strong> <strong>Why does she have to try on the dress when you're there anyway?</strong>

    What should I do? <strong>Relax, because your sister isn't in the wrong here.  If everything you've said here is correct, then you're really sounding demanding and you have a sense of entitlement the size of the Rocky Mountains.   </strong>
    Posted by ktworkman[/QUOTE]
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    All the things that entail your b-party, you are wrong on. Wrong. Do you hear me? Wrong. You do not ask for parties. Why would you think that's okay? You do not ask a new mother to go on some trip galavanting off in the countryside. Especially after she told you she's too busy. It's none of your business how she and hubby raise their child. So back off.

    You are getting married 9 months from now. 9. You do not need to do anything remotely related with BP yet. Nothing. Nada.

    It's not wrong for them to pay for the dress, it's expected, IF you asked for their budgets before you picked one out or if you're just letting them pick whatever they want. If you didn't do that step, then it was rude of you not to consider it and you should take a step back and retry that.

    You are 9 months out. There is nothing to do yet. I promise. Please sit back and enjoy Christmas and New Year's. You'll thank yourself later.
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  • orangecrush32orangecrush32 member
    Third Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Wow. There are so many things wrong with this picture it's ridiculous.

    You are way out of line here, first to expect a bachelorette party at all. It isn't a given. It is something that if someone chooses to throw for you is a bonus. You in no way get to plan or demand what happens. Your sister is completely within her rights to tell you she's too busy to plan this ridiculous party. She is not obligated to throw you a party, nor is she expected to plan your wedding. That's on you and your FI.

    Honestly, you need to take off the tiara you've bestowed upon yourself. Getting engaged doesn't make you a princess that everyone has to listen to. Reread what you wrote. Consider it from your sister's perspective. It's honestly not so terrible of her. You should really take a deep breath, step back, and apologize to your sister for acting like a spoiled brat.
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  • ktworkmanktworkman member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks all for putting it in perspective!  I really appreciate it and completely agree.  I just would like her to be more excited for me I guess and I'm taking it personally.  Good advice! 
  • ktworkmanktworkman member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The reality check is much appreciated!
  • vicki0508vicki0508 member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:95b2f7f7-36d8-4a00-8e0b-aa21649a381b">MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister/MOH has refused to plan my bachelorette party and I'm upset.  Here's why: 1. She has a baby and says she is too busy 2. I want to go to San Fransisco/Napa for a wine tasting weekend and she says it's too expensive but I live in Denver and she lives in Oakland, CA.  3. I don't even want anyone to pay for me!  My other maids who live in CO and Mass. all love the idea! 4. She thinks it's rude of me to ask my friends to go to San Fransisco even though they say they love the idea.  She refuses to plan it for me because she thinks it's unethical 5.  She thinks it's disgusting that I am asking my maids to pay for their dresses 6.  She hasn't done anything to help me at all and everytime I ask her to do somethng she flips out 7. When I'll see her over the holidays I asked if she wanted to go try on her MOH dress while I'm there and she can't commit because it depends on her 9 mo. old's mood.  Can't her hubby watch the baby? What should I do?
    Posted by ktworkman[/QUOTE]

    1.  Babies always take priority over weddings.  Babies certainly come before optional pre-wedding parties

    2.  She knows her finances better than you know her finances. If she says she can't afford it, then she can't afford it.

    3.  You are free to plan a girls weekend with you friends.  You can't plan your own b-party though.

    4.  It sounds like she really isn't interested in planning this party for you.  You can't make her, leave her alone about it already.  One of your other girls can plan it if she chooses to.

    5.  I actually agree with you here, BMs typically pay for their own dresses.  Did you ask about their budget first?  It's pretty out of line to demand they pay for some radically expensive dress if you never asked them beforehand what they are comfortable with.

    6.  BMs and MOHs aren't required to help you do anything.  If you can't plan your wedding on your own, hire a coordinator.  If you can't afford a coordinator, scale back until you can handle it yourself.

    7.  Now that she has a baby, her life revolves around the baby.  It's natural.  That's how things go.  You should try to be a little more flexible.  When she has time to try on dresses, she'll let you know.

    All in all, you need to leave your MOH alone.  Your wedding is not a priority for her.  Her baby is her number one priority.  (Really, nobody care about your wedding as much as you do)  She sounds like a busy woman, take a hint.

    ETA:  You posted while I was posting, thanks for taking the advice of the PPs and not getting all crazy about it.
  • mkruparmkrupar member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
     1. She has a baby and says she is too busy - Babies take up a lot of time that's a completely valid excuse
    2. I want to go to San Fransisco/Napa for a wine tasting weekend and she says it's too expensive but I live in Denver and she lives in Oakland, CA. - OOT bachlorettes are expensive! No one should ever ask for one
    3. I don't even want anyone to pay for me!  My other maids who live in CO and Mass. all love the idea! - Well then maybe your other BMs should throw the bachlorette. It's not a requirement for your MOH to do. It can be anyone, even someone not a part of the WP.
    4. She thinks it's rude of me to ask my friends to go to San Fransisco even though they say they love the idea.  She refuses to plan it for me because she thinks it's unethical - Again, see my response to #3
    5.  She thinks it's disgusting that I am asking my maids to pay for their dresses - She's out of line on that one. Typically the BMs do pay for their dresses. It's generious to offer to pay if you can.
    6.  She hasn't done anything to help me at all and everytime I ask her to do somethng she flips out - Again, she is not required to do anything. If she offers to help great, but you can't force her to spend HER time planning YOUR wedding. That's for you and your FI to do.
    7. When I'll see her over the holidays I asked if she wanted to go try on her MOH dress while I'm there and she can't commit because it depends on her 9 mo. old's mood.  Can't her hubby watch the baby? What should I do? - Maybe her husband can't watch the baby. Maybe he's working. It's wrong of you to assume anything and demand she spend her time the way you want. Does she already have the dress? Do you need to see it on her before the wedding?

    I haven't read any of the other responses, but I can picture you in my head stomping your foot throwing a temper tantrum because your MOH won't do these things for you. You NEVER ask anyone to throw any party for you. If your other BMs think it's a great idea, let them plan it, but keep your nose out of it.

    ETA: Aaaaaannnnddd that's what I get for not reading the entire post. Good for you OP taking everyone's advice. It's refreshing.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    ***BRAVO***.  Consider this a standing ovation for reading advice, realizing that it was delivered to help keep you from looking foolish and entitled, and thanking people for the "tough love" that was delivered.

    Stick around.  You're okay with me.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Okay with me too. We all need our Come to Jesus moments. I can't think of a single poster who didn't get at least one.
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  • lauraalannalauraalanna member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I have a question to kinda follow up with things.

    I posted something about a bridal shower and I know that a shower is a gift and should NOT be planned by me.

    Is it okay to plan a bachelorette party for myself? Maybe it woudln't necessarily be a "bachelorette party" but something where I get my girls together and just enjoy a night out on the town or something.

    I definitely would not expect anyone to pay for me or give me anything-I just didn't know what the proper ettitqute would be for that.

    Also-a lot of my BMs don't like each other so I just don't see them pow-wowwing it around to plan something together.


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  • edited December 2011
    I don't think anything you are asking for is unreasonable.  You just expect it from the wrong person.  One of the factors I thought of when choosing my bridal party was how our opinions line-up on bachelorette parties etc.  My MOH is throwing me a huge party in Cabo San Lucas.  We got a great deal through a friend that works for AAA and a couple of girls used their timeshares so we are going to have 20+ girls in cabo.  There will also be a night on the town.  If you know another maid would really love to do this for you let her have party planning duties.  My little sister asked me not to make her MOH because she doesn't have time right now.  Soon after choosing my wedding party I threw a nice dinner party for my maids and a friend from Marky Kay gave us manifures for free.  It only took an hour of their time, i offered to pay a sitter, gave them one month notice, and the girls decided who wanted to plan parties and who was too busy, what style of dresses they all prefer, etc.  It was very productive and very fun. 
  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:bc6e1f11-4690-4ed8-bde8-0d7135ec4f8e">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't think anything you are asking for is unreasonable.  You just expect it from the wrong person.  One of the factors I thought of when choosing my bridal party was how our opinions line-up on bachelorette parties etc.  My MOH is throwing me a huge party in Cabo San Lucas.  We got a great deal through a friend that works for AAA and a couple of girls used their timeshares so we are going to have 20+ girls in cabo.  There will also be a night on the town.  <strong>If you know another maid would really love to do this for you let her have party planning duties.</strong>  My little sister asked me not to make her MOH because she doesn't have time right now.  Soon after choosing my wedding party I threw a nice dinner party for my maids and a friend from Marky Kay gave us manifures for free.  It only took an hour of their time, i offered to pay a sitter, gave them one month notice, and the girls decided who wanted to plan parties and who was too busy, what style of dresses they all prefer, etc.  It was very productive and very fun. 
    Posted by ojeda87[/QUOTE]

    Well that's impossible.  No one HAS party planning duties so there aren't any to designate. 
  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:ceeb7358-48a7-4ba1-9f45-01740d664afe">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party : Well that's impossible.  No one HAS party planning duties so there aren't any to designate. 
    Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

    Lol
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  • edited December 2011

    All I really have to give input on is the fact that your sister doesn't HAVE to give you a bachelorette party. All she has to do as a part of your wedding party is show up on the day of- I'm sorry if this isn't what you want to hear but it's the truth.

    As for the dress, I agree with you. There has to be someone who could watch her child for an hour or two, especially if she is married. I'm by no means saying that having a child isn't a big deal, but she makes it sound like it's impossible- it's not.

    I would suggest that you try to smooth things over with her. She's more than likely annoyed that you assumed she would throw a bachelorette party and you probably need to address that with her. GL!

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  • edited December 2011

    I do feel a little sorry for you though ktworkman because it would be nice to have a MOH who is a little more willing to help. If I was a MOH for someone I would be sooo excited to throw them a bachlorette party because I care for them and would want them to have the whole experience.  I'm sorry things are a little frustrating. You already have a lot on your plate.  Best of luck to you!

  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:57701294-bace-4262-84af-93b60610a8f1">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]I do feel a little sorry for you though ktworkman  because it would be nice to have a MOH who is a little more willing to help. <strong>If I was a MOH for someone I would be sooo excited to throw them a bachlorette party</strong> because I care for them and would want them to have the whole experience.  I'm sorry things are a little frustrating. You already have a lot on your plate.  Best of luck to you!
    Posted by disneylover1955[/QUOTE]

    Well that's you. That doesn't make her MOH wrong. It just makes her different from you. Come back when you have a two month old child and please say the same thing.
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  • StephieBowStephieBow member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    People on this board were pretty harsh! I guess I am lucky not to have this problem as my MOH and BMs are more excited about the bachelorette then I am!

    I do understand where your sister is coming from though and I see that you've realised that as well. That said, if your BMs want to plan something for you then let them know your sisters situation and let them plan something instead.  They might have more time and/or be more excited about planning something then your sister. This also takes the pressure off of your sister to attend since she has a little one.   If they don't throw something for you well, that's too bad - ultimately it's up to them.  In my situation, the bachelorette is my MOH's #1 priority BUT she doesn't have kids, she knows all my friends and we live in the same city which makes things easier.

    It is also 9 months away... so take a deep breath.  Your shower will be a month or two before (if someone throws one) and a bachelorette is only a few weeks before.  If you really want one, why don't you plan it to get all the girls together?  This way you get the party just the way you want it without all the stress you seem to be putting yourself through!

    Good luck!!
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  • edited December 2011
    Wow people are harsh on here. Isn't this supposed to be a happy place jeeze.
  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:db657889-91c8-4762-89ec-7ad994f2c51b">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wow people are harsh on here.<strong> Isn't this supposed to be a happy place jeeze.</strong>
    Posted by disneylover1955[/QUOTE]

    Says, who?
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  • Sarahj2011Sarahj2011 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Seriously.. people turn defensive when it comes to kids :/ No matter if it is an obligation or not with planning parties, if the shoe was on the other foot, wouldn't you like to give your own sister a great party?? Being a bridesmaid and a bride within a month apart, no matter what, I made sure my friend is getting a great party thru my participation. Time to take the blinders off and view this as an opportunity you only go thru once in your life and want to make the best out of it. Props for you for taking the reins early in the planning stages, it WILL pay off I assure you.
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:db657889-91c8-4762-89ec-7ad994f2c51b">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wow people are harsh on here. Isn't this supposed to be a happy place jeeze.
    Posted by disneylover1955[/QUOTE]

    No.  Disney is the "happy place".  This board is for people to bounce ideas off of and to get feedback and advice about those ideas.  Sometimes the ideas will be validated, and sometimes they won't be. 

    Sometimes responders will give the OP considerations that she may not have thought of that can help her as she makes a decision.  Sometimes the OP will respond as the OP did, thanking people for helping to see all sides of the situation.

    And sometimes posters will respond as you did:  talking about how mean people are.

    If you want a "happy place", may I suggest a local board, or weddingwire?  They will be much happier to validate all of your ideas.  Their advice may not be as helpful, but it sounds like you'll like it better.

    Or you can go to the Magic Kingdom.  (which, BTW, I love!)
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:6d4383bf-672f-48f4-bb28-87f614c9e57f">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]Seriously.. people turn defensive when it comes to kids :/ No matter if it is an obligation or not with planning parties, if the shoe was on the other foot, wouldn't you like to give your own sister a great party?? Being a bridesmaid and a bride within a month apart, no matter what, I made sure my friend is getting a great party thru my participation. Time to take the blinders off and view this as an opportunity you only go thru once in your life and want to make the best out of it. Props for you for taking the reins early in the planning stages, it WILL pay off I assure you.
    Posted by Sarahj2011[/QUOTE]

    Seriously! Thank you for saying this!
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:cbf32d9e-d9e4-4f58-8e68-e74376ad0877">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party : No.  Disney is the "happy place".  This board is for people to bounce ideas off of and to get feedback and advice about those ideas.  Sometimes the ideas will be validated, and sometimes they won't be.  Sometimes responders will give the OP considerations that she may not have thought of that can help her as she makes a decision.  Sometimes the OP will respond as the OP did, thanking people for helping to see all sides of the situation. And sometimes posters will respond as you did:  talking about how mean people are. If you want a "happy place", may I suggest a local board, or weddingwire?  They will be much happier to validate all of your ideas.  Their advice may not be as helpful, but it sounds like you'll like it better. Or you can go to the Magic Kingdom.  (which, BTW, I love!)
    Posted by trix1223[/QUOTE]

    Wow. Soooo intense. Yea it's great to here other people's opinions and give advice but people are sooo freakin harsh. Maybe instead of being so negative try to understand that it is already stressful for the bride and there is no need to get all crazy about it. Just relax and try and be a little more supportive and understanding to other soon-to-be- brides.  
  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moh-refuses-plan-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:75b08fdc-39b3-4471-bde0-e3eca79334ecPost:29b10d7c-dd66-41ed-87f6-bccec96fd0ec">Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: MOH refuses to plan a bachelorette party : Wow. Soooo intense. Yea it's great to here other people's opinions and give advice but people are sooo freakin harsh. Maybe instead of being so negative try to understand that it is already stressful for the bride and there is no need to get all crazy about it. Just relax and try and be a little more supportive and understanding to other soon-to-be- brides.  
    Posted by disneylover1955[/QUOTE]

    Not every idea deserves "support" and "understanding". If you think it does, then you have some growing up to do.

    It's not harsh to say "She has a baby and you're not owed a party so please relax." What's harsh about that? Nothing.
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