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Been a little while since I posted, have some checks & need some advise....

angstocker22angstocker22
100 Comments
in Washington-Seattle
Hello everyone! I hope your Monday is going well..

*We've finally sent off our STD's - better late than never!
*Received our Response postcards from Vista print.
*We are doing chalkboards for the menu & with the 'photobooth' & I bought them!
*Got the guys pants, ties, shirts, and cuff links order.
*Got a few gifts for the bridesmaids & flower girls purchased too.
*Bought all the bm's their shoes (they don't know yet, they still think they have to buy them :D)
*Found a local lady to make our table runners & ring bearer pillow for 1/2 price from what I saw online.
*Put a deposit down on our Florist.
*Bought an elliptical so I can cancel my gym membership ($33/month) that I never use! (I've been like 4 times in the past year)


Now, for the advise.
My MOH is totally flaking out on stuff & it's really pi$$ing me off! We planned about a month ago to go to that Vintage Wedding Fair in Cap. hill on Saturday & she cancelled 1 1/2 hours before I planned to leave the house that morning. & She's done this many times in the past. Wedding related or not. She's always been a little flaky but not like this. It's like cause she's the MOH that she doesn't have to try as hard to help or something. I want to talk to her about it, but then again I don't cause I will just get to worked up & might say something I don't mean. Should I talk to her? Should I just wait it out? Any suggestions on what I should say?
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Re: Been a little while since I posted, have some checks & need some advise....

  • BrandyL10BrandyL10
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I say you need to talk to her. Try with all your might not to get worked up and say something you don't mean. Just be calm and let her know that you really need her to be there for you during this stressfull time and her bailing on you isn't helping. Just remind her how much you need her support and how much she means to you. Maybe that will wake her up. Other than that, I've got nothing, seems like all of our ladies are having BM issues at one time or another! Good luck!
    Married 7/17/2010 Photobucket PersonalMilestone
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  • saracksarack
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    i agree, I think that you should talk to her and let her know how it is making you feel. i'd definitely try to not say anything bad.. hopefully it doesn't get that heated.. just let her know that its really getting to you.

    on the table runner thing.... would you mind telling me how much the lady is making yours for?? i'm kinda thinkin i need table runners but would prefer not to pay an arm and a leg. thank you!
    BabyFruit Ticker BabyFetus Ticker we're having twins!
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  • mgoss228mgoss228 member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    If it helps at all, the Vintage Wedding Expo (at the Gossamer Collective) wasn't that great.  It was super small, but the champange and cheese and cookie platters were a nice touch.

    I went with my FI's Friend's FI and her friend who is also engaged (we are all getting married Spring/Summer 2011, so we are all in the beginning-ish stages of planning).  I don't have a WP yet (waiting to ask), so I don't have any BMs or a MOH to take with me to all these wedding related shows/events.  So I round up groups of 2-4 of my close friends (eventual BMs probably) and the other engaged women I know (which is about 4-5 other ladies that are engaged to FI's friends, it was a freaking domino effect this Summer and Fall with engagements in FI's social circle).

    Are there any other women that you could ask to go with you on WR activities, maybe try to arrange group outings so that if your MOH cancels you still have 1 or 2 other people to go to things with.
    OMH est. May 7, 2011
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    Photo courtesy of jennygg.com
    My never updated Planning/Married Bio: http://mgoss228.weebly.com/
    Seattle Knotties: Please page me if you send me a PM!
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  • melissa82melissa82 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Eh, you said she's always been like this. Have you ever felt the need to talk to her about it before? Or is the main reason you want to talk about it now is that it's affecting *your* wedding? Do you think that you're just noticing it more now because it affects you more? I think instead of talking to her about it (since clearly this is something that's always been a part of her personality and probably won't change), I just wouldn't ask her to do that kind of stuff with you.
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  • angstocker22angstocker22
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Mgoss228- I still went to the show with 2 of my BM's. And that cheese log was awesome! :) lol But it was WAY smaller than I thought it was going to be. I drove from Kent to West Seattle to Cap. HIll & paid $8 for that! I was disappointed!

    Melissa - Yes, she has done stuff like this in the past, but it has never been with this type of "hanging out"... What I mean is... it's been like going to the mall or grabbing a movie. Never like a birthday or an event that I invited her too. Plus, she told me a week ago that she might not be able to go & then on Friday she said "I can come!!" And I got all excited & then come to find out an hour before I leave she cancels. It seems like she is cancelling a lot on the wedding stuff. If we plan other things... like coming over for dinner or going somewhere non-wedding related she shows up.
    I was originally thinking of just not inviting her to other planned wedding related outings either, but then I am just playing games. I don't want to "dodge" the subject. I want to fix it... just not inviting her will make her feel left out and I would never do that to any of my friends.

    SARA- I sent you a PM.

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  • iwillmarrysooniwillmarrysoon member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hello! I sent you a PM earlier asking about your table runners. If you could PM me too, I would really appreciate it. Thank you in advance for your help.
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  • iwillmarrysooniwillmarrysoon member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just saw the message. Thank you!
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  • melissa82melissa82 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I don't want to "dodge" the subject. I want to fix it... just not inviting her will make her feel left out and I would never do that to any of my friends.

    Let's just be honest here--You want to "fix it" because she's pissing you off and you don't like it. And that is 100% OK but don't hide behind the idea that you're saving her from feeling left out, which is ridiculous. If she cared about it, she would have come. She's probably just not that interested in wedding stuff. But if it makes you feel better, talk to her about it.
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  • angstocker22angstocker22
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    You're right, it is rediculous. If that were the case...

    First of all. She is my best friend. I love her like a sister. And I would NEVER want to hurt her. I would never "hide" behind the "idea" of saving her from feeling left out. I want to "fix" it because it's human nature to want to mend any issues that rise with people you love. She is like my family. She is the sister I never had.

    Second, she is "Miss Wedding Planner". She would be a wedding planner if raising a 1 year old wasn't her full time job.

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  • angstocker22angstocker22
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh & you are welcome iwillmarrysoon :)
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  • angstocker22angstocker22
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I spoke to tygirljojo in private about my moh. She had a good point... I think my moh is using her kid as an excuse. Which she should never do (unless he is sick of course). She doesn't have a job cause she got laid off. She doesn't really need one though, her hubby owns his own biz. So she is home 24/7... there should be no reason why she has to cancel on me, esp if it's something that was planned weeks in advance... It just hurts my feelings to be put on the back burner.... that's all.... :(
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