Hey girls,
So I just need to vent. Bear with me! I have a friend who was really close to me and my kids for many years. She was at the birth of my youngest son (who is now 9 years old), and I was there at the birth of her son. For various reasons (mostly geographic and schedule-wise, I thought), we haven't seen much of each other over the last couple of years (we live about an hour apart and both went back to work at about the same time). Even so, I view her as a sister, and I totally thought she would be there for me for the bigger events in the wedding. But over the last few months, she's excluded me from special moments in her and her kids' lives. I tried to pass it off as her just not thinking about it, nothing personal, but I admit it's been a struggle to know how much I've been excluded from. Anyway, this friend has been remarkably quiet over the last year and a half (even for non-wedding related things that we've invited her to, like our parties for fun and for the kids). There's been no "falling out" or argument that I know of -- just that once she was there and seemed interested in our friendship, and then...she wasn't. I just tried to look at it as a distance/scheduling thing, and nothing more, but the more time passes, the more I realize that's probably not the case.
Well, my MOH sent the invites for the bridal shower over two weeks ago, and she sent an Evite for the bachelorette (same day for both events). It's this Saturday. Today, my friend told me that because the weather finally warmed up, she's taking her kids camping this weekend so is terribly bummed to miss the festivities, but will have to pass. I'm SO hurt by this, I can't even express how much. I mean, in truth, I'm not really surprised (my FI was sympathetic, but he too was not surprised). Before her message today, I tried to look at the brighter side -- she is an "all you need is love" kind of girl -- I thought this would be something she would make time for even if she hasn't been around for much else, and now that she's bowed out (and it's obvious that it's not just bad timing), I just feel so hurt. I'm 34 and this is my first wedding, and I just thought of all things I've invited her to be a part of, that she would make time to celebrate with me. To choose to go camping instead because the weather is nice -- well that just feels like an overt rejection, and it stings.
I know there's really not much I can do about it; I just feel very sad and wanted to vent. I know I'll still have a wonderful time with the friends and family who come this Saturday, but her absence just hurts, especially since (aside from family) she's been in my life longer than most of the people who WILL be there (about 10 years now).
Ok, I'm done whining. Thanks for listening!
"Love it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you,
It will set you free..."
~Mumford and Sons
