40-Plus Brides

My 3rd, His 2nd

Hello, I just got engaged for the 3rd time, they say the 3rd time is a charm and I have finally found my prince.  I guess with age comes wisdom. I want a sizable wedding but I'm not sure if that would be the proper thing to do. We are from the South and a rather small town. Oh, by the way I have an 18 & 15 year old both boys, and he has a 12 year old daughter. It is very important to me to incorporate our children in anything we do!!!! I had the princess wedding when I married my children's father, and at 40 almost 41 I'm not sure if that is what I want to do. I know I want outside, we are both very laid back and as such I want that to come through when we say our vows. Any suggestions on etiquette what is right and what is wrong? Undecided

Re: My 3rd, His 2nd

  • Neither one is right or wrong.  For a wedding (whether first or otherwise), you can have whatever size celebration you want.  You just have to figure out what works for the two of you and your children, in terms of both budget and size.

    You might also want to check out the Second Weddings board, where there are many others in your situation.
  • There are so many trends today for weddings, many work for some, some work for few,  a few work for many ... you get my drift. 

    Besides "outside" have you and your fiance come to any other conclusions about the ceremony?  If you've already honed in on your budget, I think your next step is to narrow down some other basics (how many guests, time of day, location, religious/secular, level of dress, etc.).  Take your time.  Enjoy the planning process!

    And while it is understandable you want your children involved, you may want to prepare for one or more of them to decline.  It's really up to them.

    Good luck with all of it and, most of all, have fun!
  • Hello, Like you, this is my third. My fiance and I dated in college and decided to go our separate ways and now 30 years later, back together. He wants a big wedding but being this is my 3rd and his 2nd, I don't know if we should do the big celebration. Our children, 26, 23 and 21 think we should just go to justice of peace being that we're both 50 and I'm riding the fence on this. Please help!!!!
  • queenlionessqueenlioness member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited February 2013
    Wishpr, my fiance and I share the same story as yourself. We dated over 40 yrs. ago and met up again. We are getting married in Dec. We're choosing to have a nice size wedding and reception. Even though this is the 3rd marriage for both of us, I feel like it's the first. If you and your fianc want a big celebration, I say have it....you both have earned it and congratulations!
  • You should do whatever you both want...but although my 3rd, his 2nd...I did not want to do a JP courthouse thing...How about a small,simple,elegant ceremony and a nice dinner afterwards. I get what you are saying about being older and having something more age appropriate...for YOU....every woman is different...but what is MOST important is what YOU and your FI want  :-)

    All the best!
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