• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Wisconsin

The dollar dance "debate"

So this came up on my club board and I'm curious about the answer.

I've heard from a lot of people the dollar dance is a regional thing--and it's especially popular in the midwest.  Most of the weddings I have been to have had the dollar dance, including my mom and step-dad's wedding.

I have also noticed that Midwest Sound puts the dollar dance on their worksheet for you to chose if you'd like to do it and what song you'd like to have played.

So who here is doing/has done a dollar dance? 
Wedding Countdown Ticker

Re: The dollar dance "debate"

  • jessgosz310jessgosz310 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm not planning on having it at our wedding. It seems tacky to me. I'm also not planning on doing the big group dances or bouquet toss. I think that it's your wedding, so you should choose what appeals to you for the big day!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011

    There are many who say it is regional, truth is, it's done everwhere.

    There are many who say it is more of a cultural thing: this is also true to an extent - there are variations of the dance that can be found in the Italian culture and also some Latin cultures (I'm sure there are more, but that's what I have found).

     It's up to you to decide if you are going to do it or not, but just remember: just because it's on the list of dances, doesn't mean it has to be done.

    DH and I did not include the dance (even with my Italian family suggesting that we do so) as we are not a fan.  We have attended weddings that have included this dance and typically choose not to participate and leave it as that.

    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • BackpackersBackpackers member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Ditto PP. Also not doing the garter toss. I think it's regional and based on your cultural heritage? I've seen it at one out of four weddings in the Milwaukee/Madison area and she happened to be Polish, which is where they think it may have originated. There are other variations that different cultures use as well. If you want to do it, go for it!
  • edited December 2011
    I am mainly just curious if it is a midwest thing or not. Some people on my club board said they see it all the time and others have said they've never seen it or heard of it before seeing it on TK.   The few weddings in WI I've been to have always had them, so I thought it was interesting that some people had never heard of it. 

    Backpackers--I love your must take photo!  That's so awesome!


    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: The dollar dance "debate":
    [QUOTE]I am mainly just curious if it is a midwest thing or not. Some people on my club board said they see it all the time and others have said they've never seen it or heard of it before seeing it on TK.   The few weddings in WI I've been to have always had them, so I thought it was interesting that some people had never heard of it.  Backpackers--I love your must take photo!  That's so awesome!
    Posted by debbies44[/QUOTE]

    Glad I tried to refrain from snark, haha, !

    It's interesting to see how weddings vary across the states and in other countries, isn't it?  What one considers acceptable let alone tradition where another wouldn't be caught dead doing or having the same thing.

    I think another biggie is dry bar, cash bar, limited bar, open bar ... that will get a few people heated!
    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    Our DJ had us fill out a music sheet for him and he also had Dollar Dance: Yes or No option on there!  I checked yes because all of the ones I've been to in Central/Northern wisconsin has had them...plus you can make a little extra money :) 
  • KatieD212KatieD212 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I had never heard of it (I grew up in Green Bay) until I met FI, who is from northern WI.  He is 50% polish, and EVERY family wedding on his side we have gone to which is a lot, they have had a dollar dance.  He insists on doing this and I am not so sure about it either.  It would be nice to make a few bucks, and dance with everyone, but some may be awkward.  I am still undecided.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I hadn't seen it until a friend from college got married a few years ago.  To be honest I don't really care for it.  I don't get offended if people have it but we've decided not to do it.  If I were to do it I think I would donate the money to a charity that is important to us or our families.  
  • edited December 2011
    Having moved here from New York, someone please tell me: what is a dollar dance? :)
  • edited December 2011

    The dollar dance definition that I found is:

    "In many families a "money dance" -- sometimes called a "dollar dance" is traditional at wedding dance receptions.

    In this dance, guests make an offering for the opportunity to dance with the bride or groom. This gesture is a way of wishing good fortune upon the newly married couple as well as helping them out financially."

    I am Italian, and thinking back, the Dollar Dance has been at almost every family Wedding I've ever been to,  but I've been to plenty of other Weddings where they don't.  It's totally up to you! 

    We are doing one, so hopefully the people at our Wedding have fun with it and don't think it's tacky!

     Maybe a glass or two of champagne will ease the awkwardness??  ha.

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: The dollar dance "debate":
    [QUOTE]I hadn't seen it until a friend from college got married a few years ago.  To be honest I don't really care for it.  I don't get offended if people have it but we've decided not to do it.  If I were to do it I think I would donate the money to a charity that is important to us or our families.  
    Posted by heidkecm[/QUOTE]

    If a couple chooses to do a dollar dance, this is a reasonable option ... donate it to charity and make that known.  If the guest does not agree with the chairty or the dance itself they don't have to participate.

    To the New Yorker - sorry I forgot the screenname already... the short and sweet of the dance is: the B & G ask their guests to pay to dance with them.  It can be said as cultural (which is true to an extent, but I also despise because when I hear "I'm Italian, I'm having it, I cringe and hope that others understand that not all Italians participate in this... I'm sure some of my Polish friends would agree, etc.) and some say it's more regional which was the extent of the OP's question (to find out what truth there is to that statement).

    Some people think it's okay and others think it's extremely tacky to ask guests to give you money at your wedding - you don't get married to make $ at the wedding.
      
    I personally didn't do one, I wouldn't participate in one at a wedding, and I would secretly judge the B&G a little bit if they did one becaue my thought process is: guests already have taken their time to be with you and celebrate with you, they may have spent $ to travel to be there, they may have spent $ to stay the night, they may have spent $ on new clothes, they may have spent $ on a gift, etc ... you don't ask them for more.
    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I am personally not a fan of the $ dance and will not be having one.  At my sis's wedding one of her favorite memories was during the dollar dance.  An older family friend whose wife had passed away a few years prior to the wedding joined in the line of the dollar dance.  He told my sis that he hadn't danced since his wife had passed away and he was glad to spend a few moments with my sis and wish her well.

    One advantage for the dollar dance is it gives you a few moments with a lot of guests and you don't have to dance an entire song with wierd Uncle eddie.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I am from Wisconsin, I have seen the dollar dance (although not at the weddings I have been to in WI, but a few cousins who got married in Michigan).  I too am of the opinion its SO tacky; people are already there and bringing you gifts.  Why should they pay to dance with you?  And, really, are you doing it to make money because thats tacky too.

    However, we also are not doing a garter removal or a bouquet toss, so I could be in the minority.
    I updated my bio on 06/24/10, however if you want to see my planning bio you have to go to www.lizardlipsplanningbio.weebly.com because I am having a hard time making it clicky!
  • edited December 2011
    No dollar dance for me either.  I have seen it at several weddings and I think it is common for the area, but I personnaly think its tacky. 
    Photobucket
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: The dollar dance "debate":
    [QUOTE]I am personally not a fan of the $ dance and will not be having one.  At my sis's wedding one of her favorite memories was during the dollar dance.  An older family friend whose wife had passed away a few years prior to the wedding joined in the line of the dollar dance.  He told my sis that he hadn't danced since his wife had passed away and he was glad to spend a few moments with my sis and wish her well. One advantage for the dollar dance is it gives you a few moments with a lot of guests and you don't have to dance an entire song with wierd Uncle eddie.
    Posted by kijpost[/QUOTE]

    That is a sweet story!  Thanks for sharing!

    I think to get the same opportunity you could do a "friend's and family dance" where you pick 2 or 3 songs and the DJ cue's the switch of partners for the B&G so they get a chance to dance and mingle with their guests.  No money needed for that experience!
    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited December 2011

    I don't like the dollar dance and think it is tacky. 

    However, my DJ suggested that it is a good opportunity for the photographer to get lots of pictures with different guests and the bride/groom. 

    We considered doing the dance for that reason... but were going to announce that all of the money would be going to a local charity that my fiance and I volunteer for. 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I have never seen a dollar dance or heard of it before I came on The Knot. I grew up in Milwaukee, went to school in Madison, and now live in Minneapolis. I've never seen it at any weddings in these cities that I've gone to!
  • cc7003cc7003 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I really don't have strong feelings on the dance either way. I have seen it at the majority of the weddings I've gone to and sometimes I've participated and other times I've chosen not to dance during this song...just depends on how close I am with the groom. I do like "ehathewa's" suggestion that it's a good time to get pics with many different guests. I hadn't thought of that.
    image 125 made the cut! RSVP date--August 22
    image 108 are ready for photobooth fun! image 19 are camera-shy!
    image 0 Can't find the post office!
    Vacation
  • edited December 2011
    The thing is, if you want the photo op, I defer to my earlier suggestion: pick 2 or 3 songs, do a F & F dance where the DJ cues the partner switch.

    Your guests should not have to pay to spend time with you at your wedding.  Period.
    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I've only seen it done at weddings when I was a child (so like, the 80s) and in Northern Wisconsin.  I'm not a fan.
  • edited December 2011
    I was at a wedding where the dollar dance was done with not only the bride and groom, but also their parents.  The money was then donated to a charity in honor of the bride's sister who had passed away.  Although the dollar dance can sometimes seem tacky, I thought that this was a nice touch to allow not only the bride and groom, but the parents too, to dance with several different guests and as a special way to honor her sister.  
  • awolfe2awolfe2 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The DJ that my FI and I booked had the dollar dance listed as one of the options, but he said when he does it he calls it a "Memory Dance" (I think) and tells the guests that any guests who haven't gotten a chance to dance with the bride and groom can do so during this time and any $1 donations to do so would be greatly appreciated. 
    I think it's a good compromise and we're probably going to do it. That way hopefully people won't feel like they HAVE TO pay to dance with us. 
  • IloveDouglasIloveDouglas member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It's been several years since I posted here - this place sure looks different! 

    I was at a wedding this weekend in the Milwaukee area and saw my first ever Dollar Dance.  I had a horrified look on my face when they announced it and my husband immediately said "the Knotties wouldn't approve, would they?"  He has a great memory.   The groom at this wedding was Polish so I just assumed it was a family tradition for him to have the dollar dance.  We didn't participate.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards