Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

interracial traditions

I AM NATIVE AMERICAN AND MY FIANCE IS BLACK AND WE ARE TRYING TO INCORPERATE TRADITIONS FROM BOTH SIDES OF THE FAMILY TO KEEP RESPECT TO BOTH RACES. BUT IM NOT SURE OF HOW TO REALLY DO THAT. WE HAVE ALREADT DECIDED ON DOING THE JUMPING OF THE BROOM AT THE CEROMONY. AS WELL AS THE RELEASE OF THE VEIL TO THE WIND WHICH IS A TRADITION FOR BOTH OF US. ARE THERE ANY OTHER ETHNIC TRADITIONS WE COULD ADD IN OUR WEDDING. WE HAVE ALSO ADDED IN OUR PERSONAL FAMILY TRADITIONS. MY FAMILY ALEAYS DOES THE DOLLAR DANCE AS WELL AS A KDS DANCE. THE DOLLAR DANCE IS WHERE THE BRIDE AND GROOM HAVE A FRIENDLY COMPETITION. THE DJ PLAYS 3 SONGS AND THE LADIES AT THE WEDDING LINE UP TO DANCE WITH THE GROOM AND THE GENTLEMEN DO THE SAME FOR THE BRIDE. AND YOU 45 SECONDS TO DANCE WITH EACH PERSON BUT THEY GOT TO GIVE YOU A DOLLAR TO DANCE WITH YOU. AND THE KIDS DANCE IS WHERE THE BRIDE AND GROOM GET ALL THE KIDS 18 AAND UNDER OUT ON THE FLOOR AND DO A FUN DANCE LIKE TO CHICKEN DANCE WITH THEM. AND THE KIDS DANCE IS SUPPOST TO BE LUCK AND BRING YOU LOVE AND LUCK WITH HAVING A FAMILY. IF YOU HAVE ANY OTHER TRADITIONS THAT MIGHT HELP ME OUT PLEASE EMAIL ME AT [email protected]

MONICA

Re: interracial traditions

  • Please don't do the dollar dance. It's rude for all ethnic backgrounds to ask your guests to pay for anything at your wedding, let alone an opportunity to dance with you.

    And please don't use caps-lock. It's difficult to read.
  • It sounds to me like you already have a lot of family/cultural tradtions that you are incorporating that are meaningful to the two of you.  If they aren't ALREADY meaningful to you, and you're only finding out about them from an internet message board, then I don't know why you would incorporate them in the first place.   Stick with what's meaningful to you.   

    As far as the dollar dance, I understand that this is common in some cultures and not in others.  My only advice is to proceed with caution, as some of your guests might be offended by it.  Maybe, instead of money, you could have people write well-wishes on cards and give them to you?  Or you could skip the cards/money altogether and just have people line up to dance with you?   

    Ditto the caps lock.  It makes it seem like you're shouting at us.
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  • thejucheideathejucheidea East Nashville, Tennessee member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_interracial-traditions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:69f3e4f9-ec38-4048-992b-6c59c308eccePost:3dc70390-d5b9-4cce-90e6-4eeaace16d72">interracial traditions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I AM NATIVE AMERICAN AND MY FIANCE IS BLACK AND WE ARE TRYING TO INCORPERATE TRADITIONS FROM BOTH SIDES OF THE FAMILY TO KEEP RESPECT TO BOTH RACES. BUT IM NOT SURE OF HOW TO REALLY DO THAT. WE HAVE ALREADT DECIDED ON DOING THE JUMPING OF THE BROOM AT THE CEROMONY. AS WELL AS THE RELEASE OF THE VEIL TO THE WIND WHICH IS A TRADITION FOR BOTH OF US. ARE THERE ANY OTHER ETHNIC TRADITIONS WE COULD ADD IN OUR WEDDING. WE HAVE ALSO ADDED IN OUR PERSONAL FAMILY TRADITIONS. MY FAMILY ALEAYS DOES THE DOLLAR DANCE AS WELL AS A KDS DANCE. THE DOLLAR DANCE IS WHERE THE BRIDE AND GROOM HAVE A FRIENDLY COMPETITION. THE DJ PLAYS 3 SONGS AND THE LADIES AT THE WEDDING LINE UP TO DANCE WITH THE GROOM AND THE GENTLEMEN DO THE SAME FOR THE BRIDE. AND YOU 45 SECONDS TO DANCE WITH EACH PERSON BUT THEY GOT TO GIVE YOU A DOLLAR TO DANCE WITH YOU. AND THE KIDS DANCE IS WHERE THE BRIDE AND GROOM GET ALL THE KIDS 18 AAND UNDER OUT ON THE FLOOR AND DO A FUN DANCE LIKE TO CHICKEN DANCE WITH THEM. AND THE KIDS DANCE IS SUPPOST TO BE LUCK AND BRING YOU LOVE AND LUCK WITH HAVING A FAMILY. IF YOU HAVE ANY OTHER TRADITIONS THAT MIGHT HELP ME OUT PLEASE EMAIL ME AT [email protected] MONICA
    Posted by monica&chris2013[/QUOTE]


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  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Do you mind editing your post for lowercase?  All caps is almost impossible to read.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_interracial-traditions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:69f3e4f9-ec38-4048-992b-6c59c308eccePost:209a152a-7a9a-4a7c-9714-380755bf4e79">Re: interracial traditions</a>:
    [QUOTE]Do you mind editing your post for lowercase?  All caps is almost impossible to read.
    Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]

    Overall, kept the grammar as OP originally had it, just corrected typos/made it so the grammar was generally understandable/it doesn't look like it's yelling:
    <font face="Times New Roman" size="3" color="#000000"> </font><p style="margin:0in 0in 10pt;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="color:#1f1f1f;line-height:115%;font-family:'Arial','sans-serif';font-size:8.5pt;">"I am Native American and my fiancé is Black and we are trying to incorporate traditions from both sides of the family to keep respect to both races. But I’m not sure of how to really do that. We have already decided on doing the jumping of the broom at the ceremony, as well as the release of the veil to the wind, which is a tradition for both of us.

    Are there any other ethnic traditions we could add in our wedding? We have also added in our personal family traditions. My family always does the dollar dance as well as a kids’ dance. The dollar dance is where the bride and groom have a friendly competition. The DJ plays three songs and the ladies at the wedding line up to dance with the groom and the gentlemen do the same for the bride. And you [have] 45 seconds to dance with each person, but they got to give you a dollar to dance with you. And the kids’ dance is where the bride and groom get all the kids 18 and under out on the flood and do a fun dance, like the chicken dance, with them. And the kids’ dance is supposed to be luck and bring you love and luck with having a family.

    If you have any other traditions that might help me out, please email me at [email removed, hopefully she will delete it in the OP too].

    Monica"</span></p><font face="Times New Roman" size="3" color="#000000"> </font>
    photo a826c490-726a-4824-af5c-d938878de228_zpseb85bb5a.jpg
  • Unfortunately OP, we are all too familiar with what a dollar dance is and it is incredibly rude.  Also, labeling what you want as "interracial traditions" really rubs me the wrong way.  People from the same ethnic background are never a monolithic group.  In your case, some African-Americans have traditions that come from Africa, some from the Caribbean, some from the south, etc. Cherokee and Apache and Sioux and Hopi, etc. all have very different traditions.  If something isn't already a tradition in your family or if you do not have a long connection or have not recently reconnected with your culture, I would skip it.  It actually bothers me more when people do something "culturally traditional" just for the sake of having it in their ceremony.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_interracial-traditions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:69f3e4f9-ec38-4048-992b-6c59c308eccePost:ef8aa611-763c-4561-b7a6-c93f66d70756">Re: interracial traditions</a>:
    [QUOTE]There is no such thing as inter-racial traditions.  Please do not lump all black people and all native americans into the same ethnic groups.  You may have cultural tradition s, but not racial ones!
    Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

    Bless you, CMGr.
  • Also, make sure to involve both sets of parents and ask them what traditions are important to them. Also make sure they are comfortable with doing an inter-cultural ceremony. If you get some resistance, try to compromise in a few places. I also highly suggest doing the ceremony in a NEUTRAL location to prevent drama, like outside or in a hotel (instead of a place of worship that only applies to one of you). Of course, if everyone is flexible and doesn't care, you'll have more options :-).
  • Hello,my family also does the dollar dance and nobody gets offended! if they do get offended then they don't pay 1.00 to dance with the bride,nobody makes them.Its all in good fun. The dance isn't "rude".

    And please don't let the grammar police upset you,its only your first post,you will learn without people ripping your head off LOL I could read your post just fine,some people take caps as yelling.

    Good luck planning your wedding,if you have a question feel free to private message me,Beth
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_interracial-traditions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:69f3e4f9-ec38-4048-992b-6c59c308eccePost:3df7b2f2-bce5-4358-97f3-9cd3fbc6acdd">Re: interracial traditions</a>:
    [QUOTE]Most native tribes didn't have wedding ceremonies.  The couple might exchange gifts, then they simply moved in together.  In others, the groom gave gifts to the bride's father in payment for her hand.  Sometimes a feast was held, but the couple moved in together, and that was that. The prayers and ceremonies that you see on the net are bogus.  Contact a tribal elder if you want an authentic ceremony.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

    <div> many tribes have marriage customs or traditions and they are alll different but yes she could ask triba elders or even just her own family.</div>
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