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Bridal Shower Guest List

Schnoodle500Schnoodle500 member
First Comment
in Pre-wedding Parties
We are having a small wedding, and since our venue allows a maximum of 50 people had to cut back on our guest list a bit more than we initially planned. My FMIL is already talking about my bridal shower that she wants to through me later, and mentioned that "We can still invite the ones you aren't inviting to the wedding to the shower." Is it just me, or would that seem really rude? Do I even have a say in it, since she is the one hosting the shower?
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Re: Bridal Shower Guest List

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited December 2011
    Totally rude.

    Decline the shower if she's planning to do that.
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  • Allycat11Allycat11
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Definitely rude.  Only people invited to the wedding can attend pre-wedding parties.  I'd start by telling your FMIL that you are uncomfortable inviting people to a shower when they are not invited to the wedding.  If she still doesn't listen, I would politely decline the shower.
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  • CassieeKCassieeK
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yeah, that's rude.  Don't do that.
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  • AudiofrogAudiofrog
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You're definitely right. You can't have people at the shower who are not invited to the wedding.
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  • Schnoodle500Schnoodle500 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for the advice. I will let her know I do not feel comfortable with people not on our wedding guest list being invited to the shower.
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  • Pickles48Pickles48 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just got on to ask basically the same question... except I'm wondering if there is any wiggle room for my situation. The 50 or less guests at our wedding will be strictly family, but my friend and SIL want to have a shower/going away party for me, since I will be moving out of the country for a few years after we're married. It would be primarily friends, not family, and a chance to get them all together before I leave. What do you think?
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited December 2011
    Nope.  It shouldn't have anything to do with the wedding anyway.  If they want to throw a 'going away party' that's fine but it should not be a wedding shower.
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  • MMRoberts11MMRoberts11 member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    It is very rude.  Please do not invite anyone not invited to the wedding to any pre-wedding parties.
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