Ketubah - Can a non Jewish couple use this document?

parisinflames04 · March 2012

So I have been looking for a unique wedding certificate/license and all of the ones I like are Ketubah's and I am not Jewish. Do you have to be Jewish to use a Ketubah? I don't want to be disrespectful or offensive to anyone of that faith and don't really know who to ask if this is something that can be used by some one not of that religion.
Any insight will help a ton! Thanks

ElisabethJoanne · March 2012

Only the government can issue a real marriage license. Also, this isn't what a ketubah is. It's more like a pre-nup.

If you just want a pretty piece of paper on which to create a keepsake wedding certificate, I'd just talk with the artist/calligrapher creating the artwork. If s/he's OK with it being used for that purpose, you're not going to offend anyone. It's just a pretty piece of paper you've commissioned.

Do you like the actual terms of a traditional ketubah, which is basically a pre-nup? A rabbi would say that a non-Jew can't use the traditional wording because by it Jews marry "according to the laws and customs of Moses and Israel" (or something like that, depending on translation). Those laws and customs are not available to non-Jews. I don't think there's a problem with drafting your own non-traditional marriage contract or pre-nup from Jewish sources, as long as you leave out the expressly Jewish parts. The parts about money, food, clothes, sex, etc., could be applied to non-Jews, but not the parts about Moses, Israel, and Torah are uniquely Jewish.

Also, unless you can actually read Hebrew or Aramaic, to make a keepsake from either of those languages would also be strange.

This will give you more sources on how Jews think about the ketubah:
http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/477326/jewish/The-Ketubah.htm

tldh · March 2012

Your license and certificate are going to be issued by the state.

Bonzo2011 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_ketubah-can-a-non-jewish-couple-use-this-document?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:e7fe5d81-24ff-49e2-ae3c-8ea2810333fePost:9c9bf17c-b8d5-4c74-9c71-cadc26c0608a">Re: Ketubah - Can a non Jewish couple use this document?</a>:
[QUOTE]Google or search Etsy for someone who does "calligraphy and illumination". Illumination is the name for the medieval/scroll style artwork that used to surround legal documents and historic books. Here are a few I found using the Google search "illumination marriage certificate": <a href="http://palmstone.com/marriagecertificates/" rel="nofollow">http://palmstone.com/marriagecertificates/</a> <a href="http://urjbooksandmusic.com/product.php?productid=1100" rel="nofollow">http://urjbooksandmusic.com/product.php?productid=1100</a> <a href="http://www.toucancalligraphy.com/wedding.asp" rel="nofollow">http://www.toucancalligraphy.com/wedding.asp</a>
Posted by burntofferings[/QUOTE]

The first and third link are some great resources for the OP. the second however is the Union of Reform Judaism, so those are still religious ketubah, which I would recommend she stay away from.

OP, I hope all of this helped. There are some beautiful calligraphy marriage certificates out there for you to pick from.

em01092 · March 2012

Ditto PPs. You do not get to choose your official license that will be processed by your county/state, but you can purchase a separate, unrelated "license" as a piece of artwork essentially to serve as a keepsake or something to hang up in your home.

parisinflames04 · March 2012

Thanks to everyone who answered.

very helpful and I will definitely look into contacting the etsy seller that creates Ketubah's and see if they would be willing to create something for us! & Love the idea of incorporating our vows ... Thanks again ladies!

hansa11 · March 2012

Another option would be a Quaker marriage certificate. They look similar to the Ketubah (at least the one my friend had at his wedding). All our guests signed ours (we didn't bother with a guest book then) and we have it framed in our living room. I know a couple of people who went through the same calligrapher (as did I) - http://www.calligraphica.com/certificates2.html There's some traditional Quaker wording that also works well for people of other faiths or who aren't religious, but you can also customize the wording to meet your preferences or beliefs.

fpaemp2011 · March 2012

We made a 16x20" Marriage Covenant for our Christian wedding. You can see it here: http://fpaemp2011.weebly.com/marriage-covenant.html

The paragraph at the top was our Statement of Intent.

LuckyHeather · March 2012

YES! We used the etsy seller (UrbanCollective) and she was fantastic to deal with! She changed some of the wording for us and made it perfect.

Our Ketubah is a vow to each other, and not a "license". Its a beautiful piece of art to hang up and remind you of your wedding.

Good luck! I can't wait to hear what you find.

SCogs18 · March 2012

You could also consider incorporating your wedding invite into the piece of art you are having created.

Ketubah - Can a non Jewish couple use this document?

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