Favors
JessicaE84
member
Donation In Lieu Of Favors - Ammount
in Favors
My fiance and I are both teachers and, in lieu of favors, we are going to be making donations to various academic programs through DonorsChoose.org. I teach English and Drama and my fiance teaches Math. We are also both musicians, so we are going to choose programs dealing with literacy, math and the arts, and donate to them. Is there a rule of thumb about the amount you should donate when doing a donation in lieu of favors? Is there a certain dollar amount per person? I realize we won't actually mention how much we donated but, just for my own peace of mind, I would like to know that we are doing the right thing.
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Re: Donation In Lieu Of Favors - Ammount
Make your donation. I believe in donations. I make them myself. I think they're a good thing to do.
But don't pretend that they're a favor to your guests. Because they're not. They're a favor to the organization, and to you. You're taking the money you'd spend on a little something for your guests and giving it to someone else. How do you figure that's a favor for your guests?
Honestly, I don't need a favor. I don't really want a favor. You're already giving me food, drinks, entertainment. I don't need a matchbook or m&ms (although I LOVE m&ms) as a thank you.
But please don't in any, way, shape or form think that giving $$ to a charity is somehow doing something for me.
Think of it this way: Your neighbor comes over to your house and says “I’m going to do you a favor and shovel the snow from your driveway.” That’s a favor to you. But if your neighbor comes over and says “I’m going to do you a favor. I’m going to shovel my elderly father’s driveway”, you’d be thinking “how is that a favor for me?”
Because it’s not. It’s a favor, yes. But not for you. And what would you think if your neighbor to come to your house and said “Wow! I’m a terrific person. I just went and shoveled my elderly father’s driveway! I told him I did it your honor. Aren’t I something?” That’s pretty much how telling your guests that you’ve made a donation “for them” is going to come across.
Bottom line, IMO: charity donations are not favors. Make your donation. That's a wonderful thing. But why do you have to announce to your guests that you've made a donation?
I think it's inappropriate to donate anything "in your guests' names". Let them make donations to charities that are important to them. You make donations to charities that are important to you.
Just leave your wedding out of it.
The truth behind a well laced dress
[QUOTE]Also, for the record, we are also doing a photo booth, and I understand that many people use the photos as their favor, so I think our bases are covered.<strong> If anyone does have any insight on how much I should spend on the donation, however, I would appreciate it.</strong>
Posted by JessicaE84[/QUOTE]
A million dollars. Not to be snarky, but it's not a favor - the photobooth is your favor. You, IMO, shouldn't even mention the donation to your guests, so just donate whatever you feel comfortable donating.
Horses are very important to her. Not at all to me. I don't ride. Horses scare me. I wouldn't choose to go near a horse of my own accord.
I think it's nice that she made a donation to an organization that's important to her. But it most certainly wasn't a Christmas present FOR me. It was a way to donate to an organization that means something to her.
I even got a laminated certificate telling me about how honored I should be. It's now in my recycling pile.
Contrary to PPs, I think the donation is a wonderful idea, and I myself, am toying with the idea of doing the same for my wedding in June. I donate frequently to the Disabled American Veterans organization and I am thinking that in lieu of a favor, making a $1 donation per guest to that organization. We're having 150 guests, so it'd be $150. The average per-guest cost for favors is usually only around $1 (even according to The Knot) so I think that's a fair amount. Of course, you may donate more if you wish. I went to a friends wedding who did this, and she left a note on each guest's plate letting the guest know that she and her new husband had donated $1 to their favorite charity "in their honor". They had about 200 guests so it was a nice donation. I thought it was brilliant, appreciated the idea very much and still do. As long as the charity means something to you, I think it's wonderful and I think your guests will appreciate it too. Good luck in your planning!
"But don't pretend that they're a favor to your guests. Because they're not. They're a favor to the organization" And all other comments like it...BULL. FI had a nice who died of brain cancer at 3 yrs old and she was a Make-A-Wish kid. She had disney princesses come in for a tea party, and people who donate are HUGE to the organization, so by us donating money we are doing the family a favor. We are helping other children who were in the same situation as Corin and her family. Without the donations this little girl may not have had this dream come true. When I told FSIL this is what we were doing..she cried! She was that thankful that someone she knew wanted to help other kids in the same situation as her daughter. Favors dont need to be in physical form.
To answer your question...donate what you can. We're not doing a physical favor, so they $$ we budgeted toward that will go to the organization. Any little bit helps.
People are inherently stupid. Weddings make it painfully obvious -- KevinandMonica
Like others have said. Donate what you can!
The truth behind a well laced dress
[QUOTE]Donating as a favor is a bold face LIE to your guests. I have nothing against donating to charities, one of my bridesmaids had leukemia as a child and had a make-a-wish. I donate every year to them. I also donate to the sixty-five roses charity, my alma mater, United Way, goodwill, etc. So nothing against donating to charities, and if you are able to donate, do so. This is the problem I have. A favor is a gift. When you give someone a favor, you are giving them something to their benefit. How does donating to a charity specifically benefit a guest? It doesn't. I agree that donating to a charity benefits other people, but it does not benefit your guest. It is also a LIE because unless you are making 150 separate donations of $1 in each of your guests names and giving your guests the receipt, you are not donating in your guests name. If you want to donate, please do, but you don't need to AW about it at your wedding. Which is essentially what donating in lieu of a favor is. Also, if it is that important to you, why donate in lieu of something as useless as a wedding favor? and yes, I said useless. The reception is the thank you for your guests, not the favor. Save money on favors if you would rather see the money put to better use, and donate the money you would have used towards flowers or your cake towards the charity. To me, that puts forth a better message.
Posted by ivyrose13[/QUOTE]
cosigned, tldh.
AKA GoodLuckBear14