My mom is driving me nuts and making this so much less of a beautiful wedding. I'm genuinely concerned that she is going to not show up and blame me for it or come and isolate herself with the "intent on being out of my way." With my wedding, I realized that mom has gone back to being her controlling self. She took on her own list and made a whole bunch of hideous things that suited her pallet and not mine. So naturally I was upset to find out that she made a bunch of stuff without me knowing and that I was less than pleased with it. She criticized me for not accepting it as a gift even though I didn't like it. She keeps buying things even though she is going to run out of money and will be using my credit card (that I put her name on) in case she runs out of money. And, she is so insecure about my guests that she sends me email messages calling them bad names and then insulting me about how my fiance is unemployed right now and that its not her life so what does she need to care. As you can see thats very contradicting to insult me and then say that its not her life so she doesnt need to care. Now she is threatening me to ask her to not come to my wedding. She reminds me that its MY wedding and how I made it a point that its MINE. But of coarse it is. Then she told my dad that I didnt want him to walk me down the isle, so now he feels bad. I never said that - she suggested a long time ago that I have my brother walk me down the isle because we have a divorced family and it would be awkward to decide which dad should walk me. She continues to isolate my FI mother because my mom "thinks" she doesnt like her and has never met her. She called my FI's dad a A*hole without knowing him. But now she talks about him like they are BFF's because he's the only person in my FI's other side of the family who can make it to the wedding and my mom has sympathy for him because we are a small family too and my mom things that my FI's mom said is going to overrule the wedding. I cant even get her to pick up the phone. She just sends LOOONG email messages that dont make sense and are mean. She wont sit down and talk, and she wont apologize even though I have asked. I asked her to not talk poorly about my guests, but she does it anyway and then says "what do I care, I dont ever have to see these people ever again after this day" without regard to how its going to make me feel. She refuses to apologize to me by responding that "she is an adult and I am her kid and thats the reason why she doesnt need to apologize for anything and why she never has to me in my entire life." She knows that if she doesnt come to my wedding that I will be embarrassed by it and have to explain it to people or that she will make up a story for me that she is sick or something. But if she comes, she will make it so uncomfortable because I know she is isolating herself, or blame me for sticking her in the kitchen the entire night and being the "hired help" as she likes to call herself. I have never once asked her to do anything. She offered to take on way too much stuff and then gets mad when I offer to take it off her plate. She is making me miserable and I dont want her involved at all. I am in contracts now with catering companies that she decided on to pay for, so either way I now depend on her for the food money and I'm obligated. Just one more thing she is throwing over my head. She also plans to call my brother to tell him how horrible I am being. I'm concerned because he also contracted with someone who I will be responsible for paying if I overreact to this situation. I hate this. My mom forced me out when I was 17 year sold (I would have moved out sooner if it was legal) and I have been paying for all my own expenses included field trips, clothing, etc since I was 14 and got my 1st job. She has called me horrible names my entire life even though I was a good kid, and I feel like this is her moment to regain all that control that she lost when I moved out. My MOH doesnt like to talk about it because she feels like its negative discussion and will drag her mood down, and my other bridesmaids had really good lifes and cant relate, or I cant tell them because they are the ones my mom has been talking bad about. I feel bad for my fiance because my mom criticizes him to without him knowing and I dont want to ruin this special day because of my overbearing mother. I dont know what to do you guys. I'm very woried my entire day is going to be ruined because of my mom.