Birth Control/Family Planning

TheBeckmeister · March 2011

I'm just curious... No need to post a response if you don't want, just click an answer

lisa89760 · March 2011

I'm on the pill...I've been since I was 18. Not exactly what the church teaches though.

ring_pop · March 2011

Pregnancy. Hah.

When LO is here I will use NFP.

mica178 · March 2011

I started NFP after we married. I generally love it.

clearheavens · March 2011

For those who are contempating or planning to use NFP during their marriage, I recommend charting at least 3 months beforehand to get a feel for it and getting hyped up to use it together. It truly made my engagment exciting and we talked more about it.

Also a note, your first option mentioned only the sympto-thermal method of NFP. There's also the Creighton or Billings method of NFP, which don't require a thermometer at all. My NFP instructor estimated that for 95% of us, the thermo-sympto method is more than enough. But the other two are worth a mention.

In general, the Crieghton method is more for the ladies who want a medical component and are prone to health problems or miscarriages. Your charts are carefully monitored by a nurse practitioner or doctor and anything abnormal merits blood tests to see what can bring you back to homeostasis - normal levels.

http://www.creightonmodel.com/

The Billings method is the one used by most NFP users around the world and is great for those whose waking schedule is never the same day in and out (nurses, doctors, flight attendants, and so on).

http://www.boma-usa.org/

[Deleted User] · March 2011

We are still using the Pill, however, as soon as we TTC and get pregnant, we have talked about switching to NFP. I know H really wants to give it a try. We need to take a class and I have been doing some of reading about it. I know this is not an excuse, but things have just been so busy with us right now as well.

I know NFP is really reliable but then there are so many people at our church that use it and have so many kids. That scares me.

threepinkroses · March 2011

I don't want to discuss what I use but we plan on going au natural once we're married in May. I don't know much about NFP but the little I've picked up on reading here I don't know if it will work for me. I work nights and don't sleep the same times from day to day, which is something that I understand is important when checking temperatures. Can anyone help me out with understanding this better? ETA just saw the links from clearheavens!

agapecarrie · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:79e947a5-ca49-4091-9e71-9b4ed69125e7">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't want to discuss what I use but we plan on going au natural once we're married in May. I don't know much about NFP but the little I've picked up on reading here I don't know if it will work for me. I work nights and don't sleep the same times from day to day, which is something that I understand is important when checking temperatures. Can anyone help me out with understanding this better? ETA just saw the links from clearheavens!
Posted by threepinkroses[/QUOTE]

You only need constistent sleep times with ST method. Temperature is only a secondary sign anyway, not the main sign. NFP is designed for women with irregular cycles.

Also-- about lots of kids...many people who use NFP veiw children differently than a lot of people... as a blessing and want many of them. Many people who use NFP don't follow the rules or decide to disregard them for one time...which is all it takes. This is not a fault of NFP.

Riss91 · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:f28e5c39-169a-416b-aa11-9c817922bc1a">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE] I know NFP is really reliable but then there are so many people at our church that use it and have so many kids. That scares me.
Posted by MissySue20[/QUOTE]

I don't think you should be scared! But I understand where you're coming from as many women feel the same way. I think it's important to talk to people that have used NFP to get a better idea.

Seeing large families in church doesn't equate to NFP failing. It is usually because they CHOOSE to have that many, based on their family structure beliefs and desires. It doesn't mean that NFP wasn't effective for them, or that they have that many children because it doesn't work. Also, some may not be using NFP at all and just letting nature take its course.

Many, many ladies here use NFP and have not had any issues. Also - if you go onto the Getting Pregnant boards on the Nest and the Bump, a huge amount of ladies use charting (FAM mostly) effectively. There are also many scaring things about articial BC to consider.

Calypso1977 · March 2011

I know NFP is really reliable but then there are so many people at our church that use it and have so many kids. That scares me.

ditto others. some folks just dont care and are truly happy to have large families if that's what god gives them. some choose to have large families. there are also folks who think it makes you more catholic to have a ton of kids (seen it/heard it, not making this up).

i was nervous at first, but i'm on i think cycle 27 of charting to avoid, and i have 110% confidence.

[Deleted User] · March 2011

Thanks ladies. I am aware of the negative side effects with artifical contraceptives, and H really wants to at least try NFP. I plan on going off of it soon but perhaps I would feel better if we took a class on it as well. We sort of got jipped out of the NFP thing during our EE Weekend b/c the person that was going to talk with us was unable to be there.

laurenes · March 2011

I am currently on the Pill anyway for cramps and acne, so that is our BC. I do plan on using NFP methods to get us pregnant once we're done w/ grad studies and ready for kids, should we run into difficulty (but if there's an unplanned for blessing before then, we'll consider it just that... a blessing).

I know some people are worried about the side effects of long term hormone usage. I can say from my (granted, limited - 2.5 yrs) experience, I feel better, periods are more regular, cramps aren't half as bad, etc. I know that both my mother and FI's mother used the pill before they had kids, and literally got pregnant the month after they stopped using it, so at this point in time I'm not too concerned.

Obviously, however, despite that we're all Catholics, this is against church teaching. Everyone should choose a method they are both physically and morally comfortable with.

clearheavens · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:3a8ecf01-4048-423d-aada-2fcdc3d649db">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Birth Control/Family Planning : You only need constistent sleep times with ST method. Temperature is only a secondary sign anyway, not the main sign. NFP is designed for women with irregular cycles. Also-- about lots of kids...many people who use NFP veiw children differently than a lot of people... as a blessing and want many of them. <strong>Many people who use NFP don't follow the rules or decide to disregard them for one time...</strong>which is all it takes. This is not a fault of NFP.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

I think we're used of categorizing NFP as a contraceptive method. But it really is not <em>contra</em>ceptive at all. Sure, you can ignore the rules and get pregnant. Or you can use the rules to identify phase II (i.e. fertility time) and <em>increase your chances </em>of pregnancy. :p

TheBeckmeister · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:050516bf-ebb2-4087-b7d9-a7c36b7b1405">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]For those who are contempating or planning to use NFP during their marriage, I recommend charting at least 3 months beforehand to get a feel for it and getting hyped up to use it together. It truly made my engagment exciting and we talked more about it. Also a note, your first option mentioned only the sympto-thermal method of NFP. There's also the Creighton or Billings method of NFP, which don't require a thermometer at all. My NFP instructor estimated that for 95% of us, the thermo-sympto method is more than enough. But the other two are worth a mention. In general, the Crieghton method is more for the ladies who want a medical component and are prone to health problems or miscarriages. Your charts are carefully monitored by a nurse practitioner or doctor and anything abnormal merits blood tests to see what can bring you back to homeostasis - normal levels. <a href="http://www.creightonmodel.com/" rel='nofollow'>http://www.creightonmodel.com/</a> The Billings method is the one used by most NFP users around the world and is great for those whose waking schedule is never the same day in and out (nurses, doctors, flight attendants, and so on). <a href="http://www.boma-usa.org/" rel='nofollow'>http://www.boma-usa.org/</a>
Posted by clearheavens[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I guess I didn't fully capture all of NFP, sorry! We haven't taken a class or anything, so the only info I know about NFP was what they briefly mentioned in EE and the short bit I've read in "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" (I'm not done with the book yet...)</div><div>
</div><div>Thanks for the extra info!

</div>

apardy131 · March 2011

I have been on the pill since I was 16 so roughly 8 years.... It helps keep me regular and my cramps were so bad without the pill I would be in bed for one day a month. I do not see a problem with the pill when it is used for more reasons than just birth control

bel138 · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:174f75c8-b6c0-45ae-af3c-597cf87f409f">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]I have been on the pill since I was 16 so roughly 8 years.... It helps keep me regular and my cramps were so bad without the pill I would be in bed for one day a month. I do not see a problem with the pill when it is used for more reasons than just birth control
Posted by apardy131[/QUOTE]

I know you're probably happy with the method you have now, but I just wanted to tell you that I was the same way at 16 and went on the pill for a while then too, soley for cramps and cycle regulation. The thing is, at that age your body is still really transitioning into adulthood, and your hormones are basically as awkward as the rest of you. If you went off now, you may be more regular and have fewer cramps now that your body has gotten into rhythm.

lindsaynewbride10 · March 2011

See this is where I have a different opinion than of that the Catholic Church teaches. How, in the world, is NFP not just another form of contraception?

Riss91 · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:f7080862-893c-4e05-986e-2c170541a7b3">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]See this is where I have a different opinion than of that the Catholic Church teaches. How, in the world, is NFP not just another form of contraception?
Posted by lindsaynewbride10[/QUOTE]

You're not alone. I wondered the same thing! The reason it is accepted by the Church is that it is natural. You're not artificially making your reproductive system incapable of conceiving, as is the case with birth control pills. Also, you are not preventing sperm from reaching an egg as is the case with barrier methods. The importance is the mindset that you are open to children, which the artificial methods completely rule out.

When you practice NFP, and abstain during fertile periods you are still open to the possibility of a pregnancy at any time, however unlikely it may be. I also personally feel there something to the sacrifice of abstaining.

agapecarrie · March 2011

You can read up more by reading Theology of the body for beginners and "Good news about sex and marriage" both by Christopher West

The church doesn't teach that its wrong to space children. NFP is NOT contraception. ===against conception

It does not do anything against conceiving. It is simply not engaging in sex during fertile times.

abc (artificial birth control) perverts the actual act of sex from cutting off the divine factor (fruitfulness;..life giving). It is saying, I love all of you except your fertility. God allows us to share in divine life by taking part in creating new human life.

The ends don't justify the means--- abc and nfp may share the same intent, but not the same means. One may need money to pay the bills...they can go earn it or rob a bank. Same goal, different means of getting there.

Think of a church...one can go into the church to pray (sex during fertile time), walk by it -- do nothing (abstain from sex during fertile time), or go into the church and vandalize it (contraception).

mcdol3 · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:1469c2dc-ac83-4f10-8463-b9eda1570d18">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]. Think of a church...one can go into the church to pray (sex during fertile time), walk by it -- do nothing (abstain from sex during fertile time), or go into the church and vandalize it (contraception).
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

I love this.Unique way of looking it. thanks Agapecarrie

chrissyann02 · March 2011

I'm currently on BCP due to some medical issues (none like those mentioned above) & must remain on the pill unless I plan on getting pregnant immediately. Since FI and I want to wait at least a year to get used to being newly weds and replenish our savings, I will have to stay on the pill until at least next year. I'm hoping that we do not have any trouble TTC due to my medical issues. Ideally, I would like to be able to use NFP after baby #1, but it will all depend on whether or not my body cooperates with me or not.

newlyseliski · March 2011

Fi and I are on month 8 of learning the Creighton method NFP currently and will begin applying it by the wedding night

I have PCOS which really protracted my cycles and gave me pretty severe cramping/nausea on the first day of my cycle. Now that I'm taking Metformin regularly, it has regularized and shortened the length of my cycles. When I don't take it regularly... the unpleasant symptoms come back and I have messed up cycles. Metformin is actually a medication prescribed for those with type-2 diabetes. Since Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome can be a pre-diabetic condition, metformin (aka generic version of Glucophage) in lower doses can help counter its effects on your cycle. It does not have contraceptive effects.

I was on the pill for awhile when I was younger and it really didn't treat the issue. It masked my PCOS and other semi-related serious health issues that were only discovered after I went off it. There are many alternatives to the pill to treat a lot of the issues that you ladies mentioned above... you just need to find a doctor who will help you beyond the default response of ABC.

agapecarrie · March 2011

Ditto above. I'm on metformin for PCOS. It's actually treating the cause of the problem, not the symptom.

I've discovered several problems from charting that I never would have found were I not. Another includes low progesterone.

go to www.omsoul.com to find a doc that will actually heal rather than medicate.

aclove2lope · March 2011

This was a great post...being about four months out from my wedding, I am thinking about going off my birth control and starting NFP. My fiance really wants to do this, and I also want to because I havne't had a normal cycle in about 9 years of being on birth control...I know crazy. MY ONLY CONCERN, I have a year left of nursing school after we get married, no insurance, etc. and I really can't imagine throwing a baby in the picture. I have done some research, and doing natural family planning correctly the statistics show 1-3 pregnancies a year (not per person ha that is not possible, but out of 100 women). I am hung up right now because I have to decide soon so I can start before we get married to get used to it....it also is a lot of work and I am just nervous I will screw it up somehow.

mica178 · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:f91c5078-4a11-44e1-90cc-5654672647e0">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]This was a great post...being about four months out from my wedding, I am thinking about going off my birth control and starting NFP. My fiance really wants to do this, and I also want to because I havne't had a normal cycle in about 9 years of being on birth control...I know crazy. MY ONLY CONCERN, I have a year left of nursing school after we get married, no insurance, etc. and I really can't imagine throwing a baby in the picture. I have done some research, and doing natural family planning correctly the statistics show 1-3 pregnancies a year (not per person ha that is not possible, but out of 100 women). I am hung up right now because I have to decide soon so I can start before we get married to get used to it....it also is a lot of work and I am just nervous I will screw it up somehow.
Posted by aclove2lope[/QUOTE]

<div>Why not try NFP now and see how it goes? If it's too tough, you can return to your previous BC before you're married. Honestly, I thought it would be rough, but it becomes part of the morning routine and is as easy as remembering a pill.</div>

agapecarrie · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:f91c5078-4a11-44e1-90cc-5654672647e0">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]This was a great post...being about four months out from my wedding, I am thinking about going off my birth control and starting NFP. My fiance really wants to do this, and I also want to because I havne't had a normal cycle in about 9 years of being on birth control...I know crazy. MY ONLY CONCERN, I have a year left of nursing school after we get married, no insurance, etc. and I really can't imagine throwing a baby in the picture. I have done some research, and doing natural family planning correctly the statistics show 1-3 pregnancies a year (not per person ha that is not possible, but out of 100 women). I am hung up right now because I have to decide soon so I can start before we get married to get used to it....it also is a lot of work and I am just nervous I will screw it up somehow.
Posted by aclove2lope[/QUOTE]

ACtually, NFP, when used correctly, is way more effective than any other birth control. Condoms actually get credit for preventing pregnancies when a woman can only get pregnant at most 1/4 of the time! Every single type of hormonal contraception has the potential to be abortive...in fact, there are 5-7 septic abortions for every surgical abortion. So, its not always doing the job either.

It really isn't a lot of work once you learn it. It is second nature. IT can sometimes be a bit difficult at first coming off of abc though, so don't wait.

clearheavens · March 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_birth-controlfamily-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:4e4aa818-9b0f-4635-b7d3-082756540ccaPost:f91c5078-4a11-44e1-90cc-5654672647e0">Re: Birth Control/Family Planning</a>:
[QUOTE]This was a great post...being about four months out from my wedding, I am thinking about going off my birth control and starting NFP. My fiance really wants to do this, and I also want to because I havne't had a normal cycle in about 9 years of being on birth control...I know crazy. <strong>MY ONLY CONCERN, I have a year left of nursing school after we get married, no insurance, etc. and I really can't imagine throwing a baby in the picture.</strong> I have done some research, and doing natural family planning correctly the statistics show 1-3 pregnancies a year (not per person ha that is not possible, but out of 100 women). I am hung up right now because I have to decide soon so I can start before we get married to get used to it....it also is a lot of work and I am just nervous I will screw it up somehow.
Posted by aclove2lope[/QUOTE]

<div>I really feel for you because it seems we're in the exact same stage. I was an engineer for two years, got laid off, and am now in pre-nursing working for a second bachelors while FI is in med school. I don't have health insurance, either. It's scary to think of conceiving at this time.</div><div>
</div><div>NFP is very effective despite the prejudices. Anectdotal story: my parents were poor emmigrants from Vietnam and still in college after they married and had me. They used NFP to avoid and decided to have my sibling 11 years later. They're NFP instructors at my parish and attest to NFP's accuracy. NFP is the primary method of Vietnamese Catholics, who make up 10% of Vietnam, where there's a limit of only 2 children.</div><div>
</div><div>There is no fear. In fact, NFP is really power because it's knowledge. Unlike ABC where each day (except for period days) is the same no matter what, when using NFP you know full well of its potential given any day of the cycle you decide to make love. When you're finally ready to have a baby, it's amazing just knowing while doing it that you're probably going to conceive.</div><div>
</div><div>For all newbies, uncertainty about NFP tends to make us nervous. Learn it now, chart a few months, and see what it's like. You won't screw it up.</div>

Calypso1977 · March 2011

the biggest thing wtih NFP is self control.

the pregnancies that occur are people that cant say no to sex when they know they could get pregnant.

as we are TTA (for now anyway), when i'm entering the fertile phase, i tell my husband we're off limits until i tell him otherwise. that way, we dont even attempt to start something get passionate in the moment and then do something we might regret later. you really do have to communicate with your partner. they need to know your fertile time and non-fertile time BEFORE they get the idea that it might be fun to do something tonight.

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