garter toss alternatives

KayseL · December 2011

I've always, always, always hated the idea of a garter toss. I'm super-conservative (read: prudish) and I'm just mortified at the idea of my new husband digging up my skirts in front of everyone I know. I pretty much vetoed it before letting my fiance know, and he's upset--he really wants to be able to toss something. I told him that if he didn't think it was fair, then I wouldn't toss my bouquet either, but he doesn't want that either. How should be compromise? Am I being too picky? I just don't want to be uncomfortable at my own wedding reception, and from lurking the internet, I've gathered that bouquet and garter tosses aren't very "done" anymore. Does anyone have any suggestions for garter tossing alternatives?

trixie549 · December 2011

XP from your other post:

If you don't feel comfortable doing a garter toss, then don't. It's as simple as that. You're not being picky and your FI needs to respect your wishes. I personally think garter and bouquet tosses are horribly tacky and outdated, but to each his or her own.

The only other alternative that I've heard of is giving your bouquet to the couple who has been married the longest that is in attendance at your reception.

kaputi82 · December 2011

I agree with the tackines of the garter and bouquet toss. I'm just skipping them all together.

I think he should respect your wishes but,... Has he clearly verbalized what is he reason is for really wanting to throw something?? Can it be your bouquet and you a garter as maybe a funny roll reversal or, I like RetreadBride's idea of your ankle if it has to be a garter.

Good luck!

calliopeia2013 · December 2011

Well, I'm in the camp that thinks that the garter/bouquet tosses are not only outdated, but kind of gross. (I'm not actually conservative about this stuff at all usually, fwiw, but I think they're traditions that are more mean than fun, and also just plain skeevy!)

So, with the caveat that I'd argue for skipping both tosses, you could just hand him a garter to throw, or, you know, he could throw something else altogether. Make a groom's bouquet out of handkerchiefs/pocket squares or something.

HeatherMKR · December 2011

I love the garter toss! Although, if you're not comfortable with it, I second the "putting the garter on your ankle" idea. That way it "appears" to be a garden variety garter retrieval and toss without making you feel uncomfortable.

morganharding · December 2011

Another idea I saw on pinterest was to just put a garter on a football to toss it. I am not doing them either, only because I find them to be tacky and annoying...

tvgirl102 · December 2011

im kinda the same way, im not "prudish" but in front of his family i would feel really weird. he doesnt like the idea either. i still want to do the toss though so i think i will do the ankle idea everyone said. thanks for asking this question so i feel better!

mandctaft · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_garter-toss-alternatives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:1e51badd-7b06-43ea-b53e-30efc41ce163Post:0231730e-1865-44bf-ab87-007e84ffa278">Re: garter toss alternatives</a>:
[QUOTE]Nobody will notice or care if you skip them altogether. Alternative - put the garter around your ankle instead of your thigh. Then there's no nasty under-your-skirt stuff.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

This. That way all you have to do is lift the dress a little. No teeth or digging required.

KayseL · December 2011

Thanks, everyone! I think we've compromised on him throwing a garter from his pocket.

lopezalonso · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_garter-toss-alternatives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:1e51badd-7b06-43ea-b53e-30efc41ce163Post:6b0822e7-f29c-4820-99bf-7bc5a0f65f58">Re: garter toss alternatives</a>:
[QUOTE]I love the garter toss! Although, if you're not comfortable with it, I second the "putting the garter on your ankle" idea. That way it "appears" to be a garden variety garter retrieval and toss without making you feel uncomfortable.
Posted by HeatherMKR[/QUOTE]

I agree!

wondermom05 · January 2012

Personally, I HATE standing in the throng of women for the boquet toss, it embarasses me, and at my fiance's cousin's wedding this past October his ENTIRE family was like "GET UP THERE!" while I stood at the back with my champagne...lol anyway. A good alternative I've actually witnessed is where there is a duplicate bouqet and garter, and the bride and groom give their "item" to someone in their bridal party getting married soon or a family member getting married soon. Saves the hub-bub of the big crowd.

Also, I'm THRILLED I don't have to stand with that crowd of girls anymore

leamide · January 2012

I just think the garter and boquet toss are uncalled for. I have always hated doing them when going to weddings. So, I didn't want to do it at mine. We are going to do a dance of married couples and the couple that has been married the longest will get the garter and boquet

LittleMissCutiePie · January 2012

So I have a friend who had a similar issue, but wanted to throw her bouquet and knew her husband wanted to get in on the fun as well. She had a fun idea, and it turned out to get quite a laugh out of everyone. He bent down and went under her skirt, but didn't do any digging around. It looked like he just slipped it off her ankle, but what he really did was pull out something from his suit pocket and turned around and tossed it at the guys. It was a bundled up tshirt that read "I went to Jack and Jill's Wedding, and all I got was this tshirt!" It was super funny.

nyc1210 · January 2012

One of my friends took her groom to the bridal dressing room to take her garter off. They had time to just enjoy being married for a little bit. He took off the garter and they came back to the reception to throw it.

Dulmaria · January 2012

DH tossed a thong, a funny shaped male thong, after my bouquet toss, my wedding planner discreetly gave me the thong and I passed it on to DH, it was so funny and unexpected.

garter toss alternatives

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