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September 2012 Weddings

PSA: Our Friendly Board

Ok ladies, I know we have had the talk many times about why we like our board better than others, due to how nice and unjudgemental it is...

Here's the issue, we've been slowly letting this slide. I have gotten messages from a few different people lately saying that they feel they are starting to second guess posting for fear of being insulted or made fun of. Phrases like "tacky" or "sketchy" may seem normal to you, but we need to also consider how other people react to these statements.

Remember, everytime you post, that everyone is going to be a little different on here. Some of the girls are more sensitive, or more self conscious. Some ladies will read your tone differently than how you meant it. Sometimes its just a matter of you're not quite getting across what you're trying to say.

Before posting, just read over what you're writing and make sure you're thinking it through before posting... I want this board to stay as close knit as we've been up to this point!!!!

Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board

  • This is exactly why I probably annoy people with my excessive use of exclamation points and smiley faces... :)
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  • I think some people just aren't necessarily thinking through how it comes across to 'others'. I mean, sure you might not find what you say offensive, but remember that there are always others to consider :)
  • I'm sure I'm guilty of it.  I try to be nice, and if I can't, I try not to post a response. 
    I have a problem with speaking my mind sometimes without a filter. IRL and online.

    FWIW I like this board and how nice people are.  If you see me being mean to someone, call me out in a PM. 
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  • I agree... there are definitely some things I've regretted posting because of some not so friendly comments. It's ok to disagree and to express a varying opinion, but it's possible to do so in a nice way.
    I hope none of my posts have ever come across that way because I do reread my posts to ensure that I always provide you ladies with the respect and support you deserve :)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:bc93e7b8-ecf5-4966-8904-8e24f2357f1d">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm sure I'm guilty of it.  I try to be nice, and if I can't, I try not to post a response.  I have a problem with speaking my mind sometimes without a filter. IRL and online. FWIW I like this board and how nice people are.  If you see me being mean to someone, call me out in a PM. 
    Posted by adktd2boots[/QUOTE]

    I'm the same way. I am normally just a blunt person and often have to remind myself to be nice lol
  • I'm pretty blunt and I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing.  What i sometimes say comes out more harsh than I intend but I hate sugar coating things.  It is what it is and that's that.  I'm not sure if I have necessarily done that on these boards but FOR SURE on the other boards I frequent.  If I have, I'm sorry... if not we will all just keep being nice!!!!!!!!!! :):) (for jparli, and I don't find it annoying...)



    PS.  If I ever come up with a really crappy idea and post it.. .or pics... just tell me.  Don't do the whole "this could look better there" or "they might like this".... no... just say LBARR YOU SUCK.  I will be okay with it :)

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:cd408087-b004-45a5-908c-a83585561319">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree... there are definitely some things I've regretted posting because of some not so friendly comments. It's ok to disagree and to express a varying opinion, but it's possible to do so in a nice way. I hope none of my posts have ever come across that way because I do reread my posts to ensure that I always provide you ladies with the respect and support you deserve :)
    Posted by mamameech[/QUOTE]

    <div>My thoughts exactly! (about myself I mean!) lol</div>
  • romamor sometimes I think we are the same person LOL
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:a8a10d0d-087f-4c5f-a17d-8fb141e93bb0">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm pretty blunt and I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing.  What i sometimes say comes out more harsh than I intend but I hate sugar coating things.  It is what it is and that's that.  I'm not sure if I have necessarily done that on these boards but FOR SURE on the other boards I frequent.  <strong>If I have, I'm sorry... if not we will all just keep being nice!!!!!!!!!! :) :) (for jparli, and I don't find it annoying...)</strong> PS.  If I ever come up with a really crappy idea and post it.. .or pics... just tell me.  Don't do the whole "this could look better there" or "they might like this".... no... just say LBARR YOU SUCK.  I will be okay with it :)
    Posted by lbarr088[/QUOTE]

    I wish there was a "like" button on here.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:a8a10d0d-087f-4c5f-a17d-8fb141e93bb0">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]
     
    PS.  If I ever come up with a really crappy idea and post it.. .or pics... just tell me.  Don't do the whole "this could look better there" or "they might like this".... no... just say LBARR YOU SUCK.  I will be okay with it :)
    Posted by lbarr088[/QUOTE]

    I feel the same way, don't let me follow through on a stupid idea, that's not what these boards are for, but everything can be said with tact.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:cce1374c-4811-45ba-b355-3444500518ec">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]romamor sometimes I think we are the same person LOL
    Posted by mamameech[/QUOTE]

    <div>Haha! Me too! It's crazy!</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:c9a5f1e4-ea37-41c0-ac05-680aef1f42c4">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board : I wish there was a "like" button on here.
    Posted by jparli[/QUOTE]

    I absolutely agree.  So right now, I would click LIKE to this post.  Maybe people would be less hurt by words if they got 189 thumbs downs to their 13 likes, and realize that's a crap idea.
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    Just because you saw it on Four Weddings, doesn't mean it's a good idea.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:533bad64-d5e8-4fb6-b167-a83feec583b6">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board : I absolutely agree.  So right now, I would click LIKE to this post.  Maybe people would be less hurt by words if they got 189 thumbs downs to their 13 likes, and realize that's a crap idea.
    Posted by adktd2boots[/QUOTE]

    <div>I'd totally propose this to the TK Gods.  We all know what will happen if they add it... TK will go absolutely wonky for 3 months.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:5434be8c-4442-460a-b5c3-344e6f315677">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]This is exactly why I probably annoy people with my excessive use of exclamation points and smiley faces... :)
    Posted by jparli[/QUOTE]



    I laughed when I read this because I am the same way... :)
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  • edited February 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:5434be8c-4442-460a-b5c3-344e6f315677">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]This is exactly why I probably annoy people with my excessive use of exclamation points and smiley faces... :)
    Posted by jparli[/QUOTE]

    <div>I am definitely guilty of both of these too! And overusing the word "awesome"....</div><div>
    </div><div> But Britt, thank you for posting this. I realize that some posters have the mentality that if you're posting something on here, you're opening yourself up to criticisms. I understand that point, but I think that we all work hard to make sure that this is a community where no one has to feel afraid to ask a question. I love the fact that this isnt one of THOSE boards, and thats why this is the only one I frequent.</div><div>
    </div><div> Like MamaMeech said in one her posts recently, your wedding is a reflection of you. No one wants to hear that their idea is stupid, blah, generic, etc. Just because you wouldnt do it, doesnt mean its bad. The different wedding styles we all have going on here is what makes the brides on this board so fun to interact with :)</div><div>
    </div><div>
    </div><div>
    </div>
    September 2012: May Sig
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_psa-friendly-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:8521faf1-cd9a-4cec-a134-83348c9e2571Post:40bdda82-20a6-45eb-b45d-8f5950df8297">Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: PSA: Our Friendly Board : I am definitely guilty of both of these too! And overusing the word "awesome"....  But Britt, thank you for posting this. I realize that some posters have the mentality that if you're posting something on here, you're opening yourself up to criticisms. I understand that point, but I think that we all work hard to make sure that this is a community where no one has to feel afraid to ask a question. I love the fact that this isnt one of THOSE boards, and thats why this is the only one I frequent.  Like MamaMeech said in one her posts recently, your wedding is a reflection of you. No one wants to hear that their idea is stupid, blah, generic, etc. Just because you wouldnt do it, doesnt mean its bad. The different wedding styles we all have going on here is what makes the brides on this board so fun to interact with :)
    Posted by ekk120[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Exactly! </div><div>And you're welcome :) 

    </div>
  • Yikes!  I hope I haven't offended anyone!  I know that I've used the term "sketchy" in terms of a registry website.  I certianly didn't mean the person/couple was sketchy, I just wasn't sure how legit the service was and I didn't want anyone's guests to lose their money.

    I think the ladies are great here :)
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  • I haven't really thought any posts were rude.  I do have a thick skin though and realize that it is a public forum, to prepare myself for people not liking my ideas.  I hope I don't offend anyone and if I do I'm sorry Innocent  Just call me out on it and I'll rephrase something or apologize for being a wench.

    I love this board and like everyone who posts here.  I pretty much stopped posting on others and just stay here.  I wish my local board would pick up again.  I miss some of the other girls.
  • To be the devil's advocate, we, as readers, also shouldn't read too much into what is being written...we all come here for advice and what people have written isn't meant to be mean, just honest.  And as mamameech, we all have different tastes, so we can respect that.  But I'd like to feel we can all be honest with what we say as well so I think it's a 2-way street.

    But like others have said, if I have offended anyone I apologize because my comments weren't meant to do so.
  • Thanks for the reminder Britt... while I try to always be mindfull of how I'm saying something, my hubby is always reminding me to think before I speak!! LOL 

    @ jparil... DD is always telling me to "stop with the emoticons Momma!!" .... I just laugh at her! This is how I talk IRL so after 24 years she should be used to it!! :))

    So if I have offended anyone I really do apoligize and as PP have said please let me know, maybe I can clarify what I was saying. I too think the ladies on here are great & this is the BEST board going! Laughing

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