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Just Engaged and Proposals

Did you buy a house or rent an apartment for your future marriage?

My boyfriend has been working at his new job for about 6 months now. I thought by now he'd have enough saved up to rent an apartment for himself. We've discussed marrying in the future and I have a pretty good amount saved up for our wedding day. I was hoping that once he got an apartment, it would seem more established and he'd be able to propose sooner rather than later. Whats the average cost of a one bedroom apartment in nc?
He's actually a registered nurse at a hospital.

Re: Did you buy a house or rent an apartment for your future marriage?

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  • You can look through the apartment ads on craiglist to get a general idea as well.

    FI and I got an apartment together for a year, then bought a house and moved into it almost exactly a year to the day later. We actually weren't engaged when we bought our house together. He proposed like three months later. 
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  • We got married a few weeks ago, and next week we are moving into a new duplex we are renting that we signed on right before our wedding.
    We've been living in my tiny apartment together for about 8 months prior to the wedding.
  • We owned our own home for 7 1/2 years before we got engaged :)
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  • We bought our home right after getting engaged. Before that we lived in an apartment together for 2.5 years.


  • Is he taking this opportunity to maybe pay down some student loan debt?
  • In Response to Re: Did you buy a house or rent an apartment for your future marriage?:
    [QUOTE]Is he taking this opportunity to maybe pay down some student loan debt?
    Posted by kmmssg[/QUOTE]

    This, and several questions. Does he have roommates and you'd like him to live alone (why?), or does he live with family to save money/help out? Do you live on your own? Have you ever? I just feel like it puts a lot of pressure on him to say that he's the one who needs to live on his own in an apartment. I'll admit I've always had roommates, not because I couldn't afford a place, but because it saved me some money and I don't like living alone. Why would you think he would propose faster if he's spending more money on his living situation, or, is it an independence thing? Conversely, if he, or either of you, can't both pay to live somewhere (assuming he's living at home or somewhere with extremely reduced rent) and save money for a wedding how on earth would you be able to consider buying a home? That's the mortgage, plus living expenses, plus insurance, plus if anything breaks it's your problem. I'm pretty nosy, but it doesn't seem like most people's answers to the question in your title are going to help in your situation. 
    I personally, and from what I've read and heard, don't think it's worth buying a house if you're not going to live in it for at least 5-10 years. Your return on it simply won't be high enough to make the investment worth it, unless you live somewhere that was totally unaffected by the real estate crash. Places are coming back, but it's also much harder to buy a home than it was a few years back. 
    That all being said, my FI is in the military, so we won't be buying until he's out. or if, towards the end of his career we find somewhere we really want to come back to. We're renting a nice townhouse right now, but we're not in a city either of us want to live in permanently. We're considering moving to a different apartment community after the wedding because it's closer to work and is nicer for the money we pay. We live off-base right now because the housing on base isn't as good as what we have, but that could change when we move. 
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  • We lived in an apartment together for the past three years; got married last July. We just closed on our first house yesterday.


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  • We've been renting for the past 6 years. We are smack dab in the middle of purchasing our first house. The closing date is set for Oct 1st.
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  • In Response to Re: Did you buy a house or rent an apartment for your future marriage?:
    [QUOTE]We bought our home right after getting engaged. Before that we lived in an apartment together for 2.5 years.
    Posted by RailWayWife[/QUOTE]

    That's bascially the exact same situation as me. We lived together for 22 months in an apartment before we bought our house. 2 months after moving into our new house he proposed.
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  • I personally beleive in living together before marriage, due to the fact that so many jump in when they really don't completely know each other. Living together provides you with the opprotunity to see your spouse at his/her best and their worse. And you'll be spending more time with eachother so at first it's very normal to argue and such more often.

    Me and my Fiance actually moved intogether after only being together for 4 months we got an apartment. Then we got another apartment(a larger one) then we rented a house, and now we've just purchased our first home together. Were not married yet and technically were not offically engaged. We poured all of our money into purchasing our first home, money that was inteneded on an engagement ring. But a home took proirty over a ring.

    Although i haven't received my ring yet were still making arrangements as planed for our wedding and I don't regret any of our decisions. =)
  • We rented an apartment for his last masters year at college, then bought a house about 8 months ago, and got engaged June 8th. I agree with PP that you should live together before getting engaged, because the first few months of us living together we discovered  A LOT about eachother that we didn't realize in the previous years of dating. But we got through everything and adjusted, and now I'm loving seeing him every day and having our house together. Living together is the ultimate make it or break it, and I think in this day and age you don't need to stay at mom and dad's up until the wedding day. Actually you should be a little more independent and know that you can rely on yourself before getting married anyway. FI and I made sure we had a hefty rainy day fund in ADDITION to our down payment and money for furniture and house things. In 8 months we've already had to have pest control for squirrels in the attic and carpenter bees and our air conditioner give us problems, both of which aren't fees most people can just pay without blinking. Savings is a lifesaver. Some people drown their savings when they buy a house, which i can't advise against strongly enough.
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  • thejucheideathejucheidea East Nashville, Tennessee member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    We bought a house after dating for about two years.

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