Processional for 2 guys

davenport52803 · November 2011

Ok we're trying to figure out how we are going to do the processional. We're a male couple, and unfortunatley we've never been to another gay male wedding, just one with two brides, so we're kind of confused how to do it. We're each having two attendents and two flower girls. We will have the flower girls walk down the aisle, then attendents walk down in pairs. The question is whether we should walk down together or what? what are your opinons, or what have you seen done in the past?

Thanks for your help.

MillBride2012 · November 2011

My partner and I will walk down the aisle together. You should do whatever feels right to you though! There are no rules!

chrmun · November 2011

I'm curious about this, too. My original idea was that we would "just sort of get up there". This idea was not greeted with universal approval. I don't really dig the idea of one of us going first, because it sort of makes one of us "the lady", y'know? But I also don't really dig the idea of walking down together, because it kind of messes with the symbolism of coming in as 2 and walking out as 1.
One thing I thought of was having 3 seating sections, so there would be 2 aisles.

davenport52803 · November 2011

chrmun, thats kinda the idea im toying with too. having us each walk up a different aisle at the same time. I was just wondering if it would look alright. I know there are no rules and all, but just wanted to hear what others were doing or have done. I also dont really want to walk up together, or have one go before the other, cause like you said it kinda makes one look like the woman. i know thats bad to say, but thats what i thought too.Our venue has several options where we could walk up separately, there are two stair cases we could use to enter from as well, so I;m sure we can work out something. This is kinda the last detail we need to cover. We've got a few months, we're getting married March 31, 2012, so we can still hash it out.

2dBride · November 2011

NotFroofy and I walked together. However, I think having each of you come in a different way at the same time would be lovely!

chrmun · November 2011

Another plus to having three sections is that it sort of gets rid of the concept of my side/your side and lets us mix up our people in the middle.

jayetheartist · November 2011

FI and I are doing the one at a time thing, but instead of looking at it as a "this makes one of us the girl/guy" thing I think it's more of a special attention thing. The last bride or groom down the aisle gets what is traditionally the bride's "spotlight" position.

avigailandcharlie · November 2011

Two of my best friends are getting married and they are each walking down an aisle (two different ones) together, and then will come together at the front, and end their walk toward each other.

Another idea is that a wedding can be looked at not as "someone been given away" but as two families joining together, so having the two families enter from different doors and then meet in the middle and all walk together.

Michelyn B · December 2011

I really like the idea of having 3 isles! I think that would look lovely too! FI and I haven't made any final decisions on this topic either. I also like the idea of waling in at the same time from diffrent isles and joining together in the front/center. I think that really symbolizes the two families joining together. I have to figure out how I'll do that with my father and tween son who both insists they walk me, which is a good thing

TioTee · December 2011

I don't know it anyone has suggested this, however, one idea that may work for you, and depending on the venue, is that you enter at the same time, but from separated parts of the venue, then join in the center, before heading toward whomever is officiating.

In any case, it will be a beautiful occasion and everyone will love whatever you choose. Good luck you guys.

cwestra · December 2011

I've been to queer weddings where the couple each walked in from different sides at the same time, with their parents. It was very nice, and worked well in their space (open field with the chairs arranged in a circle). Basically they came in the sides and then walked down the center aisle together at the end. Keep in mind that people will have to divide their attention between the two of you, which isn't always as easy as it sounds. I've also seen lots of queer couples walk down together, alone or preceeded by their families, and that's very nice. My sister and her wife wanted to go together because they felt like they already had a life together, and they wanted the symbol to be blessing what they already had versus "starting a new life together."

My future wife and I had a hard time deciding what we want to do. Two aisles won't work for us, and we want to walk down with our parents. We are currently thinking that I will walk first, and then she will come next and meet me up front. She is much dykier than I and will not be wearing a dress (I probably will) and she is worried that she will come off as "the guy" in our relationship. So I'll do the more "manly" role and go first, because I don't care and it makes her feel more comfortable. So, instead of worrying that one of you will look like the lady, you could consider using that (antiquated) idea to challenge pre-concieved notions.

But long story short? Do whatever works for you and your future hubby. Figure out what works for you. The best part about the queer wedding is that you get to make your own rules, right?

Processional for 2 guys

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