IN NEED OF ADVICE.....

tirathemrs · April 2013

FI and I was talking last night, well i was more venting to him last night about how he seems to be procrastinating with getting his guest list together (come to find out he did it at work and has just forgot it there!) and how we need to get on the ball with getting everything in order for the big day.. Coincidentally his brother is also engaged to get married this year in DEC. and I have talked with his FI and she's like o yea we have already booked the hotel (where she works) and I just put money down on my dress and how everything is on schedule with the guest list and food selections and everything is good with their plans...(NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG IM NOT IN NO WAYS COMPARING MY DAY TO HERS BUT WE WERE ENGAGED AWHILE BEFORE THEY EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT GETTING MARRIED) so im telling him all this and also how they have already booked their honeymoon and we have yet to even discuss what we want to do for a honeymoon.... Now im super frustrated and hes like well Latira if you want to have the big wedding with all this stuff you really want in it we can do it but we have to push the date again.... <PAUSE>

This was my argument when we were engaged to be married next year in August and he was fighting for a courthouse wedding and complaining constantly about spending all this money on feeding other folks. Now hes like well we can push the date to early next year and that way we can just pay some things off now book the venue and do what you want (ME SMH)....... So now im confused as to what i want to do, mind you i want the big dress the beautiful location for pics and a great menu with lots of dancing and fun but im wondering should i just stick to our original plan and go to the courthouse in Oct do a small reception without all the big thrills and call it a day or just push it out to possibly April of 2014 and do it they way ive always wanted to....PLEASE HELP LADIES ANY ADVICE IS WELCOMED IM JUST A BIT CONFUSED and i hate to tell ppl all over again that well it was supposed to be in Aug of 2013 but we moved it to Aug of 2014 and then decided we wanted to do a courthouse thing in Oct of 2013 but now want to change it to April of 2014 (JUST TYPING THAT MAKES ME FEEL CONFUSED AND SILLY) plus i feel sooo bad about going to my planner yet again and explaining to her our new decision..... DJM!!!!!

MrsBad13 · April 2013

Wow...Like I said before, I think you can still do the courthouse ceremony in Oct. and still have a kick ass reception. Still have the venue you want to hold the reception. Wear your princess dress, take your pics at the perfect location you want. There ceremony is just coming together as one. save all the money you would spend on ceremony decor, programs, and other stuff and put toward the reception.

Do you want the Wedding party, walking down the aisle to that song and so on. If you feel you will be missing all that then and cant do it in Oct. Then push it back til April 2014.

Its really what you and FI want.

LeciaB · April 2013

No judgement here.. first of all kudos to him for actually having a guest list.. i have yet to get one from him..I dont think that a honeymoon is a big thing.. cant he look at it like a vacation witht he 3 of you guys.. I felt like the small reception was a good compromise.. ..sorry i dont think i am much help

MissusD1116 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_in-need-of-advice?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:832dab75-575c-4247-a8cf-d0032a42a3a9Post:73cd3d49-80ed-4b27-be1c-5a974086289a">Re: IN NEED OF ADVICE.....</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow...Like I said before, I think you can still do the courthouse ceremony in Oct. and still have a kick ass reception. Still have the venue you want to hold the reception. Wear your princess dress, take your pics at the perfect location you want. There ceremony is just coming together as one. save all the money you would spend on ceremony decor, programs, and other stuff and put toward the reception. Do you want the Wedding party, walking down the aisle to that song and so on. If you feel you will be missing all that then and cant do it in Oct. Then push it back til April 2014. Its really what you and FI want.
Posted by MrsBad13[/QUOTE]

This!!

sweettiffy03 · April 2013

I would say if you really want the big shabang, I would just push the date back. Especially if its something you really want to do. You don't want to have it I October then regret it months/ years later.. But if you decide try to make this the final date if possible..you can still do a nice wedding in a budget... Just my opinion.

raven&mark · April 2013

I think you should stick with your original date. Like pp said, you can still have the court house wedding and have a big party reception. But ultimately its up to you. Whats most important you you, having the big bang party reception or having a traditional ceremony? Me personally, I wanted to have a courthouse wedding and a big reception as well but I let family talk me into having a big traditional wedding. And to be honest, I wish I would have just did what i wanted to do originally.

nursing2u · April 2013

Tira...

I thought you two communicated about this topic???

Him coming back after he was sooooo ADAMANT about a courthouse wedding...

This is truly up to the two of you. I would be concerned that he would come up with something else that would cause you to change your date again... And I know.. that isn't what you want...

You seemed soo at peace with the courthouse ceremony and having a nice reception... what is wrong with that plan??? and saving the money for buying a house...

I see another conversation in your future... "like ASAP".. because I know this flip flopping is going to drive YOU crazy..

praying for the answer to come to you!!!

IN NEED OF ADVICE.....

Re: IN NEED OF ADVICE.....

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