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Personal Attendants

steph8289steph8289
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in May 2013 Weddings
I am wondering if you guys have any ideas for my two personal attendants? I want them to be thanked for there work but since there job is different I want there gift to be different from my bridesmaids. The bridesmaids are getting totes, with a necklace, and some small things like perfume, there favorite adult beverage and a few other small things.

So does anyone have any ideas for them? One is my best friend and the other is my aunt!
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Re: Personal Attendants

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    SSaltzman87SSaltzman87 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I'd shop for them like it's their birthdays. For my BMs, I got them each different things tailored to their taste- like for one I got her some Color Run stuff amongst other things since we're doing it together in July. 
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    Sharpschruter22Sharpschruter22 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited April 2013
    Having personal attendants is incredibly rude. There is nothing about it that is an honor. Waiting on a bride hand and foot? That job belongs to someone you hire and pay, like a day of coordinator. I'm not being rude to you, I am explaining how the vast majority of people feel about this new trend. You didn't ask them to be a bridesmaid, which automatically makes them feel like second choice when asked to do this menial task. It is beyond insulting.
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    Annas2013Annas2013 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    I wouldn't have a personal attendant(Sharpshruter's right), but since you are, like Steph said, shop like it's their birthday.  
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    SwazzleSwazzle member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_personal-attendants?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:4ca6e90d-5945-4f10-99bc-b5d357fc9432Post:b41d09ba-ea35-483d-baf5-455abdb6760f">Re:Personal Attendants</a>:
    [QUOTE]Having personal attendants is incredibly rude. There is nothing about it that is an honor. Waiting on a bride hand and foot? That job belongs to someone you hire and pay, like a day of coordinator. I'm not being rude to you, I am explaining how the vast majority of people feel about this new trend. You didn't ask them to be a bridesmaid, which automatically makes them feel like second choice when asked to do this menial task. It is beyond insulting.
    Posted by Sharpschruter22[/QUOTE]

    <div>All of this.</div>



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    Carson386Carson386 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I wouldn't have them, just because I don't agree with the concept. But shop for them like its their birthday as mentioned above. If one really likes wine, you could give her a nice bottle of wine, and maybe some nice cheese or something to go with it? My mom is a wine fanatic and got a bottle of wine, cheese, and a personalized bottle stopper for her wedding. She loved it.
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    MayDay513MayDay513 member
    First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    I am not having personal attendants. But what is the appeal of having them? Exactly what do they do?

    However, when thanking someone who is help with my wedding, hosting a shower, giving a gift, or just general thanking people, I always like to include a card explaining why I am thanking them. Along with a well thought out gift that the individual would actually enjoy.
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    orangjulorangjul member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_personal-attendants?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:4ca6e90d-5945-4f10-99bc-b5d357fc9432Post:b41d09ba-ea35-483d-baf5-455abdb6760f">Re:Personal Attendants</a>:
    [QUOTE]Having personal attendants is incredibly rude. There is nothing about it that is an honor. Waiting on a bride hand and foot? That job belongs to someone you hire and pay, like a day of coordinator. I'm not being rude to you, I am explaining how the vast majority of people feel about this new trend. You didn't ask them to be a bridesmaid, which automatically makes them feel like second choice when asked to do this menial task. It is beyond insulting.
    Posted by Sharpschruter22[/QUOTE]

    <div>Dude, the original poster did not ask if she should have a personal attendant or not.  People love to twist people's questions into their own private agenda on here, and that is what is RUDE.  I personally think the personal attendant thing is a little odd, but whatever, that wasn't the point of the post.</div>
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    Annas2013Annas2013 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    They weren't turning it into a private agenda.  They were explaining etiquette.  No big deal.  Some people actually gave answers, but then again they'd like to try and keep people from being insulted.  Ask this on the e-board and they'll tear into you.  No one here did.
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    SwazzleSwazzle member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_personal-attendants?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:4ca6e90d-5945-4f10-99bc-b5d357fc9432Post:b216b566-8269-4094-bdd1-7525a3c16efc">Re:Personal Attendants</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Personal Attendants : Dude, the original poster did not ask if she should have a personal attendant or not.  People love to twist people's questions into their own private agenda on here, and that is what is RUDE.  I personally think the personal attendant thing is a little odd, but whatever, that wasn't the point of the post.
    Posted by orangjul[/QUOTE]

    <div>Private agenda? Telling someone that what they're doing is rude is not a private agenda. It's an attempt to help the OP not look bad in front of her friends and family. Having a personal attendant is like saying, "be my slave for the day". </div><div>
    </div><div>Last time I checked, it's a public forum and we can post however we see fit. That includes letting someone know that their idea isn't the best and they should probably rethink it. If the OP doesn't want to take our advice, then that's on her. </div>



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    orangjulorangjul member
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    If her wedding is just a few weeks away, I doubt she is going to change her plans.  Just sayin'.
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    Sharpschruter22Sharpschruter22 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited April 2013
    In Response to Re:Personal Attendants:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Personal Attendants:In Response to Re:Personal Attendants : Dude, the original poster did not ask if she should have a personal attendant or not. nbsp;People love to twist people's questions into their own private agenda on here, and that is what is RUDE. nbsp;I personally think the personal attendant thing is a little odd, but whatever, that wasn't the point of the post.Posted by orangjulPrivate agenda? Telling someone that what they're doing is rude is not a private agenda. It's an attempt to help the OP not look bad in front of her friends and family. Having a personal attendant is like saying, "be my slave for the day".nbsp;Last time I checked, it's a public forum and we can post however we see fit. That includes letting someone know that their idea isn't the best and they should probably rethink it. If the OP doesn't want to take our advice, then that's on her.nbsp; Posted by rdr716[/QUOTE


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    SwazzleSwazzle member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_personal-attendants?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:4ca6e90d-5945-4f10-99bc-b5d357fc9432Post:b77edfb5-00aa-44b0-8c63-3eb29e273cdd">Re: Personal Attendants</a>:
    [QUOTE]If her wedding is just a few weeks away, I doubt she is going to change her plans.  Just sayin'.
    Posted by orangjul[/QUOTE]

    <div>OK.</div>



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    Sharpschruter22Sharpschruter22 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    In Response to Re:Personal Attendants:[QUOTE]If her wedding is just a few weeks away, I doubt she is going to change her plans. nbsp;Just sayin'. Posted by orangjul[/QUOTE]

    It is her decision of course, but now she knows what she is planningto do is rude and will make her look like an ungracious bride. After gaining that knowledge she would be a fool to not heed the advice given.

    I was not rude. I have no ties to OP and gave her unbiased advice. Friends and family will likely support her idea, but talk about her behind her back. If OP is hurt by my reply or thought I was rude, it is because she didn't like my answer. It doesn't matter that my answer wasn't what was asked for. If someone asked you which bridge would be the best one to jump off of for a quick death, would you tell her which one or try to talk her out of jumping off the bridge?

    It bears repeating that I would be very insulted if I was asked to be a slave for the day.This is not an honor.
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    jojo01041982jojo01041982 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_personal-attendants?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:4ca6e90d-5945-4f10-99bc-b5d357fc9432Post:99aed70b-fb03-496d-b4bf-b0939343a3d7">Re:Personal Attendants</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Personal Attendants: It is her decision of course, but now she knows what she is planningto do is rude and will make her look like an ungracious bride. After gaining that knowledge she would be a fool to not heed the advice given. I was not rude. I have no ties to OP and gave her unbiased advice. Friends and family will likely support her idea, but talk about her behind her back. If OP is hurt by my reply or thought I was rude, it is because she didn't like my answer. It doesn't matter that my answer wasn't what was asked for. If someone asked you which bridge would be the best one to jump off of for a quick death, would you tell her which one or try to talk her out of jumping off the bridge? It bears repeating that I would be very insulted if I was asked to be a slave for the day.This is not an honor.
    Posted by Sharpschruter22[/QUOTE]

    Well said!!
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    JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited April 2013
    Personal attendant = slave.  Don't do that to someone that is supposed to be your friend or family member.
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