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Need MOH Advice

missyjp94missyjp94
10 Comments
in Wedding Party
I've been off and on friends with SE. We were friends growing up, then lost touch for some years, and became friends again in college. We've talked about her being my MOH once I get married.

I also have an older sister that I've always been really close to. I've looked up to her since I was little, and she's my role model to this day.

This past year I've been through a lot of hardships. It's really shown me who I can rely on. SE wasn't supportive through everything like I needed her to be. It really took me by surprise and hurt. My sister, however, was supportive from the start and still is. 

I've been doing a lot of thinking during this past year, and I'm not sure if I want SE as my MOH anymore. I know we had talked about it, and so that's why it's making it really hard. I think that I should have someone I can be honest with and that supports me and loves me no matter what as my MOH.

Help!
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Re: Need MOH Advice

  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited April 2013
    Have you already officially asked her?  If so, you can't "demote" her. If not, it sounds like you are closer with your sister, so I would choose her. Or you could make them both your MOH, or have no MOH at all. 

    Your wedding is over a year away, so you really shouldn't be making any bridal party decisions right now anyway. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • missyjp94missyjp94
    10 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-moh-advice?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:2b8ff61d-c16f-449e-b26a-83f87eecddcbPost:fda47cc9-3d3e-46ef-8b22-ab8e7067fb7a">Re: Need MOH Advice</a>:
    [QUOTE]Have you already officially asked her?  If so, you can't "demote" her. If not, it sounds like you are closer with your sister, so I would choose her. Or you could make them both your MOH, or have no MOH at all.  Your wedding is over a year away, so you really shouldn't be making any bridal party decisions right now anyway. 
    Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>I'll consider those both, thanks for your help!

    </div>
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  • Sierra524Sierra524 member
    500 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    As long as you havent officially asked her to be you MOH, you are okay to ask your sister. But like Addie said, you cannot demote your friend if you already asked her. She is also right when she says that since your wedding is so far away, you dont need to ask your BM right now. Give it more time & really see where both of those relationships stand at that point. I would ask about 6-8 months out, not a year.
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  • PeledreamsofrainPeledreamsofrain member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    Ditto the what Addie said. There's nothing wrong with having two MOHs.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • winelover123winelover123 member
    1000 Comments 250 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I'm confused as to whether you've asked your friend to be MOH or have only vaguely talked about it. If you haven't actually asked her to be your MOH, you can definitely ask your sister. If you have, you can have 2 MOHs. Don't demote her unless you want to end the friendship though.
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    It depends on what you mean by "talked about it".  If she left that conversation feeling that it was a done deal and she'd agreed to be MOH, you can't kick her out.  If the conversation was more along the lines of possibly someday being each other's MOHs when you weren't even engaged, there's no need to stick to that plan.  
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  • alexshep09alexshep09
    First Comment
    edited April 2013
    It sounds like your sister definitely needs to be your MOH! She's always been there for you and you know that you will be able to depend on here being there and supportive for that day as well. If SE is a good friend then she'll understand. It's you're wedding, you should have the person that you feel most comfortable with standing next to you!

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