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Invites and Paper

Wording...To include or exclude the parents?

Both my fiance and I have been living on our own for several years and are near our thirties.  His parents are funding only $1000 more than I am.  We are doing 100% of the planning for the wedding.  We both feel indepent from our parents, but don't want to stir up trouble.  Do we include "together with their parents" on the invitation or not?

Re: Wording...To include or exclude the parents?

  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_wordingto-include-or-exclude-the-parents?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:d26e7a84-33f7-4687-b621-b2a8946a2cedPost:f186572f-8880-45bb-b497-96317043df97">Wording...To include or exclude the parents?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Both my fiance and I have been living on our own for several years and are near our thirties.  His parents are funding only $1000 more than I am.  We are doing 100% of the planning for the wedding.  We both feel indepent from our parents, but don't want to stir up trouble.  Do we include "together with their parents" on the invitation or not?
    Posted by jandj0909[/QUOTE]

    Since his parents are contributing to the wedding, it is polite to ask them.

    It seems like you and FI are planning to host, so "together with their parents" would be fine.

    Though some parents are very traditional and like to be listed by name, so just ask! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    In a situation where everyone's paying, using "together with their parents" is fine.

    But the purpose of a wedding invitation is not to map out the family trees or indicate who's paying how much, which really is only the business of the couple and their parents.
  • My parents are divorced.  My mom is paying for the reception and my dress-related expenses.  My dad is paying for the photographer and possibly helping my mom with the reception.  My FI and I are paying for everything else.  We put "together with their families...", because we wanted to honor both sides, even though FIs parents weren't able to contribute. It also helped avoid having to put my parents on two separate lines, awkwardly drawing attention to their relatively recent divorce.
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