Moms and Maids

Please Help

I'm a little conflicted here.  My fiance and I live in Florida.  The wedding will be in Florida.  One of my bridesmaids is in New Jersey.  Am I required to pay for her plane ticket and bridesmaid dress or just the dress?  Her family comes down every year for vacation so I was going to try and plan the wedding around then?  Am I wrong to do that as well. 

Re: Please Help

  • My fiances mom is in her seventies.  She doesn't like wearing revealing clothing.  Her philosophy is the baggier the better.  How do I distinguish her dress from my mothers dress without the two women looking out of place?  I love his mom and I want her to feel comfortable, and my mom I am not worried about her.  Do I as the bride even get a say in what the mom's wear? 
  • Teddy917Teddy917 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited April 2013
    You aren't required to pay for either, although it would be a nice gesture if you have the money in your budget. No you don't have a say in what the mothers wear.
  • First issue: you don't have to pay for either her plane ticket or dress, but if you have room in your budget, that's awesome! Remember to ask her for her budget before asking her to buy a dress, if you go that route. 

    For the second issue: Adults dress themselves. That includes mothers of the bride and groom. Tell her you want her to wear something that makes her feel beautiful whatever that may be. If she asks you for suggestions, then feel free to offer some. 
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
  • Not required, but if you can easily pay for it, it would be super nice to offer.

    For the second issue, the only people you have a right to dress at the wedding is your wedding party.  Everyone else has every right to dress themselves, and trying to intrude on that will not be welcome.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • Girlfriend!  The fact that you're trying to plan YOUR wedding around them, is MORE than enough! You are not required to pay for dresses, shoes, accessories and transportation. Some brides, however, are fortunate enough to be able to pick up the tab for one thing or another because they want/like to, or to help a friend out.  So if you can, that's great! But don't feel bad if you don't or can't.

    As far as the next question goes, I'm in a somewhat similar predicament so, the advice everyone else is giving, is helping me!  Hope you don't mind me mooching of your post! :)

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