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April 2013 Weddings

Wedding Week Meltdown

Well, I think I just had my first wedding week metldown. My mom just told me that she talked to my brother, and his wife, my SIL, may not come and I immediately burst into tears at work. Her aunt, who is like a second mom, is dying of cancer and has maybe 1-2 months left. They live about 3 hours away as well. I feel conflicted, because I know how hard that is. My dad died of cancer, but I went to a good friend's wedding 2 days before he died because there was nothing I could do, and I wanted to be there for her. I already feel hurt because FI's sister didn't come to the shower, so clearly that meant nothing to her. And now my SIL who has been family for 8 years, is all, well.. your wedding isn't that important? I mean, she can easily come up for just the day, we visit them for the day a lot. Our family is tiny so if she doesn't come, honestly, I don't know if I'd be able to get past that for a long time. Ugh.
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Re: Wedding Week Meltdown

  • Did she just find out her aunt had cancer? If so then that I can understand. She wants to spend as much time as she can with her aunt before she goes. That's how I was when my grandfather was diagnoised 7 1/2 years ago. Just let them know it would mean a lot to you if they did come, and I'm pretty sure your SIL's aunt wouldn't want her to stop her life just for her. It would probably be good to have the experience of your wedding, that way she can tell her aunt all about it and give her something happy to think about.
  • No, she found out a couple weeks ago. My brother said as of now she's planning to be there. Unless something major happens to her aunt the day before or morning of, I would understand her missing it then. And I know her aunt wouldn't want her to miss it, since her aunt has her entire family- all her own kids and boyfriend and parents up there. So, we'll see. I think it was just that on top of how she and my brother have reacted to things to this wedding that set me off- they've been very.. make life totally easy for me, but we won't think about you, even though all we ever do is think about them. So it's just irritating.
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  • I think they reacted too quickly and said they weren't coming before actually thinking it through. I am sure they will be there for you.
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  • Who knows... the aunt is actually worse off, and I'm much more calm today so I can understand better. Still hurts, but whatya gonna do!
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