Wedding Recap and Withdrawal

This maybe a silly question but...

I keep going back and forth with hiring a coordinator. I don't want to be stressed out at all about the wedding, I don't want to lose focus (which is easy for me to do) that it's about us not everyone else and I don't want to turn into a bridezilla. Then again I don't want to spend any extra money either. What was your experience? BTW I'm getting married next Summer 2014 and I have a ton of questions so this probably won't be the last post that you guys see from me Smile

Re: This maybe a silly question but...

  • If you have it in the budget, I'd get one. At least a day of coordinator. It takes so much stress off of you knowing that someone is in charge on your special day and you can just sit back and enjoy.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I agree, if you can afford it, hire one.  My DOC includes "ongoing consultation" in her fee, so if I have questions about anything wedding related, I can get in touch with her.  She's been great at giving advice on vendors and generally navigating me through the process.  When I got engaged, I'd never been to a wedding as an adult so I didn't even know where to start! 
  • Have you done any research into prices? I suggest posting on your local board asking for recommendations for a coordinator in your budget. I found one that was suprisingly a lot less expensive than I expected.  She has been phenomenal and I am so happy we hired her. Second only to our photographer, she is our favorite vendor. I'm so happy I will have someone to help the day of. 
  • I thought it wasn't worth it. My ceremony and reception were at the same place, so the venue provided a worker to be our liason. He and the JOP got everyone situated for the ceremony. The liason and I think the DJ got everyone situated for the start of dinner. My photographer kept track of myself and my DH. The wedding party was able to grab things for me (for instance, I never got my own drink all night. Family and wedding party were constantly offering to get it for me) or people I needed for pictures. My mom took charge of getting the corsages and bouts out to the VIPs and stuff like that. 

    Now, the thing is, I didn't ask for them to do these things (aside from my vendors). I just knew my family could be relied upon for the small things. 
  • So far, it has been worth every penny.  I hired a day-of person who has taken over 90% of wedding prep a few weeks ago (her contract really only required her to step in two weeks before the wedding to help but she steped in a week or so ago to help).  I know it depends on who you get but she has been a God-send in organizing everything, keeping me on track, going through details I hadn't thought of at all, etc.  If you have it in your budget and are a busy bride with life, work, etc. with not a lot of free time, I recommend hiring someone.
  • If it wasnt for the venue hook ups and my cousin's "family hookup" i wouldnt have done it....but could regret not spending the money....i think it depends on your vendors, venue and communication

    ****The Future Mrs. Ikeard**** wedding countdown
  • We didn't have one. I was very "hands-on" with the wedding and wanted to be involved in that aspect. I did, however have friends who volunteered to be the "day of coordinator" just to make sure everything runs smoothly and have someone else be concerned about the small stuff (after all on your wedding day there isn't much that can be done so you just have to pray that it goes as perfect as possible).
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_this-maybe-a-silly-question-but?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:12Discussion:6e7a7435-26fa-445b-887b-2d754e149981Post:c964ab9e-29d9-409e-9b33-b2444bbc2bfb">Re: This maybe a silly question but...</a>:
    [QUOTE]If it wasnt for the venue hook ups and my cousin's "family hookup" i wouldnt have done it....but could regret not spending the money....<strong>i think it depends on your vendors, venue and communication
    </strong>Posted by aquari0216[/QUOTE]

    This bolded part. We didn't have one, and looking back, there was no way we needed one. Our DJ coordinated the first dance, parent dances, and cake cutting. The manager of the reception venue (and her staff) had everything set up the day prior to the wedding. Yes, FI and I added a few things, but it took 10 minutes, if that, the day before. Our florist knew when and where to deliver the flowers. Our photographer knew when and where to show up and our time schedule before and afer the wedding.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_this-maybe-a-silly-question-but?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:12Discussion:6e7a7435-26fa-445b-887b-2d754e149981Post:67d1e798-e225-46e8-be19-d191ebbf149c">Re: This maybe a silly question but...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: This maybe a silly question but... : This bolded part. We didn't have one, and looking back, there was no way we needed one. Our DJ coordinated the first dance, parent dances, and cake cutting. The manager of the reception venue (and her staff) had everything set up the day prior to the wedding. Yes, FI and I added a few things, but it took 10 minutes, if that, the day before. <strong>Our florist knew when and where to deliver the flowers. Our photographer knew when and where to show up and our time schedule before and afer the wedding.
    </strong>Posted by Smooch711[/QUOTE]


    It's awesome when everything goes according to plan.  But, in the off chance that someone drops the ball, it's priceless when the bride and groom don't have to put out fires or spend one moment worrying who will when they should be enjoying themselves.

    I say hire a professional day-of coordinator if you can.  Other than the photographer, it was the best-spent money of the whole process for me.  I am a detail-oriented control freak and being able to express my expectations without worrying about a) whether things would get done, b) whether things would get done <strong>the way I wanted</strong>, and c) offending a volunteer friend/relative DOC with my perfectionist expectations was a huge relief.  I was able to totally relax and enjoy the day's events from the time I arrived at the venue to get dressed until the time we left, without one worry.  If anything went wrong, it was handled without my knowledge.  I didn't even have to wonder how things were coming together upstairs while I was getting ready because my DOCs sent picture messages of the tablescapes, cake, etc. and checked in periodically with descriptions.  It was a luxury I didn't have with my first wedding, so perhaps that is why I appreciated it so very much.
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  • I think it depends on the details of your wedding. The reception hall we went with included the cake in the price, included the linens, we opted for their centerpieces so they took care of decorations. They also took care putting out placecards & favors for me since I dropped them off a few days prior to the wedding. So the only thing was the DJ who had worked at reception hall before so he had a relationship with them already so they coordinated the time of things between them. 

    We had a limo and I emailed the company a detailed list of instructions on where & when the driver needed to be, they followed it a t, so no issues there. Also by letting the parents & bridal party know the plans for the wedding day they knew what was going to be happening so they helped things to go smoothly (things like where to be when, what the day of schedule was & what things at the reception they needed to participate in like intros)

    But if I was having an event where there would be a lot of day of organizing say an outdoor reception where tables, chairs, dance floor, lights, decor & all that would need to be set up. I would have hired a coordinator to deal with all of that. 
  • I didn't have one, but ou venue provided a coordinator. And while she was helpful, it's more likely that she was there to protect the venue--not to be overly helpful to me. Not trying to put her down..just saying to keep that in mind. 
    My mom offered to help with anything I needed, but I wanted to do it all myself..and she lives 200 miles away so there were certain things that she couldn't do in advance. Like getting the fire permit. It would have been really nice to have someone else do that for us (and make sure that we qualified the first time instead of having to go back twice!). 
    Will your venue give you any references? Perhaps you can contact other brides to ask what their experience was. Ask if they could change things what they would do differently. 
    Good luck!

  • I didn't have one but I am a project manager and very OCD about running a tight shift. I had recruited some of (now) husband and my close friends who attended my wedding and they all had a very small tasks to complete to help me out. The venue we used had a staff member present but we were really responsible for everything going on. 

    If I had to do it all over again and I had the budget I would definitely hire a DOC to run things for me so I wouldn't have had to worry about things getting done. However, I do have some great friends who went above and beyond to make sure I enjoyed my day. 
  • Thanks everyone...I decided to go with a planner. And I must say SHE is great! This is my second marriage (the first time I eloped) I have no clue what goes into the planning and I will drag my feet since we aren't getting married until next year. I don't even want to start to look for a dress!!
  • I didn't have one, and our event went perfectly. I am NOT a control-freak who has to be in charge of every detail, but I think I did a darn good job - and without stress! - for what I had in mind for the wedding. I didn't even make a "true' list - just thought of the big things and everything else fell together. Like someone has mentioned before - it's ONE day. I said, "I do" (and H did too!) and that's all I "needed." The rest is really just frills - and I didn't "frill" it up to the nines - but it was very "me." I don't regret not having a coordinator.
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