Can you have just the church and not have a reception

Nicole0408 · April 2013

Has anyone ever heard of people just having a church ceremony and not having a reception?

AJuliaNJ · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_can-you-have-just-the-church-and-not-have-a-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:05f81c87-a946-48c0-9750-adc0d7e38dcePost:08cc0ef8-26d6-4c1d-b62a-bb710252eed3">Can you have just the church and not have a reception</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone ever heard of people just having a church ceremony and not having a reception?
Posted by Nicole0408[/QUOTE]

<div>No, never. You should at least host punch and cake for an hour after. People are going to want to spend some time with you and with each other. I think leaving after the ceremony would feel like such a let-down. </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

Nicole0408 · April 2013

Thanks all - thats what I was thinking but just wanted to confirm.

Peledreamsofrain · April 2013

Yes, you can do this if you are eloping, and have NO GUESTS.

If you have guests, and you don't 'receive' them, you're being massively rude. It's your duty to properly host guests for any event. It would be like inviting people to your house for dinner, then demand they cook their own food, then GTFO before you eat your dessert.

AJuliaNJ · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_can-you-have-just-the-church-and-not-have-a-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:05f81c87-a946-48c0-9750-adc0d7e38dcePost:a8ec3d15-b12d-451e-bbe7-e30eebbc8902">Re: Can you have just the church and not have a reception</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, you can do this if you are eloping, and have NO GUESTS. If you have guests, and you don't 'receive' them, you're being massively rude. It's your duty to properly host guests for any event. It would be like inviting people to your house for dinner, then demand they cook their own food, then GTFO before you eat your dessert.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

<div>Good analogy. I'd take it one step further and say it's like inviting people to your house, cooking a great smelling dinner, and then asking them to leave before you eat it.</div>

JMalettas · April 2013

I think it should definitely be up to the bride & groom on how they would like their special day to be. I think if you were to let your guests know well ahead of time that it is a simple church wedding, not followed by dinner or dancing, that they would reply to the r.s.v.p accordingly. Of course this is definitely not the 'norm' or how my fiance and I would have done it, but I think every wedding is different, and people lose sight of the 'marriage' and sometimes focus a little too much on the 'wedding.' Both of which are important, & hold different levels of importance to each couple. I think if this is how you and your fiance want to have it, then go for it! Lots of couples get married at courthouses, or elope to Vegas. I don't see how this would be any different than a choice similar to either of those. Do whatever makes you happy! This is one of the first days of the rest of your lives, and it should be exactly the way you imagined it!

Happy planning!

AJuliaNJ · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_can-you-have-just-the-church-and-not-have-a-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:05f81c87-a946-48c0-9750-adc0d7e38dcePost:f7724d99-baab-459e-bdb0-81e778442c3f">Re: Can you have just the church and not have a reception</a>:
[QUOTE] I think it should definitely be up to the bride & groom on how they would like their special day to be. I think if you were to let your guests know well ahead of time that it is a simple church wedding, not followed by dinner or dancing, <strong>that they would reply to the r.s.v.p accordingly. </strong>Of course this is definitely not the 'norm' or how my fiance and I would have done it, but I think every wedding is different, and people lose sight of the 'marriage' and sometimes focus a little too much on the 'wedding.' Both of which are important, & hold different levels of importance to each couple. I think if this is how you and your fiance want to have it, then go for it! Lots of couples get married at courthouses, or elope to Vegas. I don't see how this would be any different than a choice similar to either of those. Do whatever makes you happy! This is one of the first days of the rest of your lives, and it should be exactly the way you imagined it! :) Happy planning!
Posted by JMalettas[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Unless it was my mom or BFF, I would RSVP accordingly with a no.

</div>

Nicole0408 · April 2013

Thank you everyone for all of your advice. I appreciate everyone's input as I was looking for honest answers. We are having the reception because deep down that is what I (we) want. I was just trying to find alternatives to the norm, but again thank you everyone for your feedback.

pends123 · April 2013

My cousin got remarried last fall with a relatively small family/family friend ceremony which I believe was all word of mouth and no invites. She did not have a reception afterward which I thought was strange but said that they plan on having a hog roast in the spring haven't heard about that since. I'm glad you decided to host a reception. It was odd just sitting/standing around watching the BP take pictures while waiting to say goodbye and congrats. :

pends123 · April 2013

Also, it was in a small church.

JMalettas · April 2013

I apologize if anyone was offended by my post. I didn't realize that ALL wedding's apparently need to follow a specific etiquette. I do agree you don't want to offend guests, and you want everyone to enjoy in the day. I do think though, that there are OBVIOUSLY all different types of weddings all over, and there are ways of doing it how you'd like it, without upsetting everyone. For my wedding we're doing a full ceremony & reception with dinner/open bar, but if a friend were to have 'just' a ceremony, of course I'd be there, because I'm a good friend, and it's not my day. Of course this is MY opinion, and obviously not how everyone would feel.

This being said, this was my opinion, and only one 'opinion' among others. I'm happy to see Nicole0408 has chosen to go with a reception, as I definitely think you'll be happy you did! Have fun planning your reception!

-J

Can you have just the church and not have a reception

Re: Can you have just the church and not have a reception

Choose Another Board

Search Boards