Step moms outfit....

DaisyDwyer91 · May 2013

I don't know if this is the correct board or not. But I am having an issue with the outfit my step mom choose to wear for my wedding.... She is a much larger women, she has a GIANT butterfly tattoo on her chest. She choose a very low cut dress that reveals most of the tattoo. I feel that it's very inappropriate, and to be honest, I find it quite gross. How do I tell her that I would prefer her to keep it covered?

athomfor · May 2013

You don't. She is a grown woman and can dress anyway she chooses.

kmbryant2413 · May 2013

...You don't, unless you want to start a fight. She's the one who will look trashy, not you. You can't tell adults what to wear, so don't.

Also, what does being a larger woman have to do with anything? Is your issue with the tattoo, or the size of your stepmother?

Maggie0829 · May 2013

Your step mom can wear whatever she wants. If she wants to show up in a clown outfit (no matter how scary that would be) she could. If she looks ridiculous it will reflect poorly on her not you.

daveANDkristen · May 2013

There is no way to dictate what she wears unless you are okay with the very real possibility of hurting her feelings. She will be the one to look foolish and it won't affect your wedding day. You are probably not likely to order a photograph of your stepmother to hang in your home - and for any family pics, maybe your photographer can position everyone in such a way that her tattoo isn't noticeable. This is more trouble than I would go to, but it's about your only option.

daveANDkristen · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]...You don't, unless you want to start a fight. She's the one who will look trashy, not you. You can't tell adults what to wear, so don't. Also, what does being a larger woman have to do with anything? Is your issue with the tattoo, or the size of your stepmother?
Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

I was just about to go back and ETA this.

Ella and Pedro · May 2013

Why don't you and your fiance plan to smash cake on her bosom? Just get a really big smear going and it should cover most of that butterfly right up.

itzMS · May 2013

The one very slim possibility of an exception to the rule of "leave her alone" would be if you're getting married in a church.

Some churches do require modesty in dress.

If that's the case, you can be honest with her and say that your church requires shoulders and cleavage be covered. Otherwise you really just have to let it go.

mc4dj13 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]Why don't you and your fiance plan to smash cake on her bosom? Just get a really big smear going and it should cover most of that butterfly right up.
Posted by Ella and Pedro[/QUOTE]

ROFL Good show dahling

I agree that the only thing that may work in your favor so you can indirectly control her choice of clothing would be guidelines set by your church. As far as I know, for my church they only have restrictions on the bride not her guests. Someone suggested positioning her so that the tattoo is hidden in pictures and I think that is a great idea as long as you don't make it too obvious. Maybe that is why you told all of us that she was large and It is kind of hard to hide a large person in photos.

Good luck!

Maggie0829 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]The one very slim possibility of an exception to the rule of "leave her alone" would be if you're getting married in a church. Some churches do require modesty in dress. If that's the case, you can be honest with her and say that your church requires shoulders and cleavage be covered. Otherwise you really just have to let it go.
Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

OP, if this is true of where you are getting married you could possibly buy her a nice wrap that goes with her dress for her to cover up with while in the church. This way at least some of your pictures won't have the boobalicious butterfly showing.

But if you aren't getting married in a place that has restrictions then just let that butterly soar and chuckle about it later.

QueerFemme · May 2013

In Response to Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]I don't know if this is the correct board or not. But I am having an issue with the outfit my step mom choose to wear for my wedding.... She is a much larger women, she has a GIANT butterfly tattoo on her chest. She choose a very low cut dress that reveals most of the tattoo. I feel that it's very inappropriate, and to be honest, I find it quite gross. How do I tell her that I would prefer her to keep it covered?
Posted by DaisyDwyer91[/QUOTE]

You don't. You keep your mouth closed and your judgment to yourself.

Consider this scenario. let's say you are shopping for your wedding gown... and your FMIL says "ohmygod, those bones around your neck are showing, you are a MUCH skinnier woman, and you look GROSS. You should buy a high collar dress so I don't have to see that".

Sound rude and judgmental? Yeah, your post sounds the same way.

MuppetFan · May 2013

Have fewer photos taken with her in them for you to be bothered by....or ask the photographer to position her at an angle.

s-aries8990 · May 2013

Just smash cake on her, like Ella said. At least she'd match your MOH's face...

renegade gaucho · May 2013

I, too, am interested to know why your stepmother's size is relevant here.

Maggie0829 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]Just smash cake on her, like Ella said. At least she'd match your MOH's face...
Posted by sydaries[/QUOTE]

I was wondering what the MOH reference was all about and then I found the thread. All I can say is wow.

kmbryant2413 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Step moms outfit.... : I was wondering what the MOH reference was all about and then I found the thread. All I can say is wow.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

Please post the link here, because the new way they set up peoples bios leaves me having no idea how to post-stalk someone for dirt.

Maggie0829 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Step moms outfit.... : Please post the link here, because the new way they set up peoples bios leaves me having no idea how to post-stalk someone for dirt.
Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

Here you go! Oh and the way you do it is just by scrolling down and clicking on "My Posts" and all there stuff should show up if it isn't set to private.

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_new-twist-on-feeding-each-other

theretamaragoes · May 2013

If her outfit offends you, simply try not to look.

You don't get to choose the outfits for anyone outside of your bridal party.

dizedd · May 2013

I'm a "very large " woman- with NO tattoos, and I'm not offended by the OP's question. I take it she means the woman is not just large, but very well endowed, WITH a giant tattoo on her chest. I like my "endowments"- but I wouldn't showcase them at someone elses wedding by wearing an extremely low cut dress! That's rude! It's not nice to upstage the bride by wearing white, and it's not nice to upstage her with your GIANT boobies either

Especially if they have "artwork" on them.
OP, perhaps you could sugest to your stepmother that you would like to go shopping with her to pick out something that would suggest she also has a place of honor in your heart, something that will loosely coordinate with what your mother and the grooms mother are wearing, Hopefully you can steer her towards something with a more modest neckline. Good luck!

Viczaesar · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE] I'm a "very large " woman- with NO tattoos, and I'm not offended by the OP's question. I take it she means the woman is not just large, but very well endowed, WITH a giant tattoo on her chest. I like my "endowments"- but I wouldn't showcase them at someone elses wedding by wearing an extremely low cut dress! That's rude! It's not nice to upstage the bride by wearing white, and it's not nice to upstage her with your GIANT boobies either

Especially if they have "artwork" on them. OP, perhaps you could sugest to your stepmother that you would like to go shopping with her to pick out something that would suggest she also has a place of honor in your heart, something that will loosely coordinate with what your mother and the grooms mother are wearing, Hopefully you can steer her towards something with a more modest neckline. Good luck!
Posted by dizedd[/QUOTE]
There is no etiquette rule about upstaging the bride with your bazongas.

BostonGIrl4732 · May 2013

In Response to Re: Step moms outfit....:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Step moms outfit.... : There is no etiquette rule about upstaging the bride with your bazongas.
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]

DED

arendiva · May 2013

Honestly this plus the smashing cake post just makes me think OP is a troll.

dietz49 · May 2013

My stepmother didn't choose an inappropriate dress, but she did choose a hideous one! Looked like something for a Hawaiian luau. So when I saw it I said that it was ok, but it didn't seem special enough. I explained that I wanted her to stand out from the other guests and I wanted her to look and feel special. I then suggested that we went dress shopping together. We did and I was able to help he pick out a very nice dress.

Step moms outfit....

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